Guide on How to Fail at Online Dating

Edited by Divetus

They had said that there were only ten minutes left on the video, but when Jing Huan returned to the cubicle, the two of them were still on the webpage.

Hearing the sound of the door opening, Gao Zixiang, who was wearing only one earphone, didn't even turn his head and said, "Huanhuan, it's the last two minutes, really! You login first, we'll be right there!"

Xiang Huaizhi glanced at Lu Wenhao's computer screen and paused stepping forward.

It was the video of them killing the God of War at noon.

Xiang Huaizhi reflexively looked at the person in front of him.

Did these two roommates know that he was actually Xiao Tianjing?

"Scram, don't even come now, I'm playing with others." Jing Huan said with dislike.

Hearing the sound of two different footsteps behind him, Gao Zixiang turned around and was stunned when he saw the people behind him. "Senior Xiang… Why are you here? Came out to get online too?"

"En," Xiang Huaizhi said, looking away from the screen. "Is it convenient for another person to sit here?"

Before they could answer, Jing Huan had already sat in his seat and helped him drag out the chair next to him. "Xiang Ge, sit here and just ignore them."

"Of course it's convenient," Lu Wenhao said. "Senior, are you alone? Did Lu Ge come out?"

Xiang Huaizhi nodded. "He had something to do."

On this big weekend, Lu Hang had absolutely shit to do.

He was just wrapped up and knocked out in his blankets right now.

After the battle video finished playing, Lu Wenhao said with great emotion, "Other people only take 60 minutes to kill the God of War. When we try to kill the God of War, we get our entire team killed in 60 minutes."

"Whenever you're finally as strong as that Fairy Fox Cave, our entire team won't have to be killed off." Gao Zixiang said coolly, "Other people's blood pools are a CD skill. Your blood pools could be called a lucky gift. If you manage to eat it, you'll win the big prize."

Lu Wenhao sneered and countered, "You don't even have half the damage of Yearning For, and you want exclusive blood pools like those of Xiao Tianjing's? How would that match?"

Xiang Huaizhi: "…"

He glanced at the person next to him, and Jing Huan's expression was scattered. He was completely slouched in the chair, as if what they were talking about had nothing to do with him.

"Okay, then I won't say Xiao Tianjing…" Gao Zixiang's gaze swept to Jing Huan, and he opened his mouth and said, "Huanhuan! You know Huanhuan hasn't played NCH for many years, yet that day at that Internet bar, even him playing it casually for a bit was stronger than you."

Lu Wenhao told himself that he wasn't angry, definitely not angry. If he got angry enough to get sick, that would be just as Gao Zixiang had wished.

"Laozi won't quarrel with you anymore," Lu Wenhao closed the web page and suddenly thought of something. "Hey, drat, I forgot to see what divine weapon the warlock finally got."

"Junk," said Gao Zixiang, "I went to the forum, and they said it was the most common grade. The light was still not purple yet."

Lu Wenhao nodded. "Then I'm relieved."

Jing Huan turned on the computer to play PUBG and turned his head to urge. "Ge, you log in."

This big battle royale game was so popular that Xiang Huaizhi had naturally come into contact with it. Relying on his memory, he entered his account password and logged into the game.

"Wait, Senior Xiang." Lu Wenhao thought of something and leaned forward, full of smiles. "I heard Lu Ge said that your NCH account was especially awesome. Can you take this opportunity to enlighten me?"

Xiang Huaizhi's tone was natural. "That account has already been sold."

Lu Wenhao's face was full of regret. "Oh, if that's the case…okay ba."

Soon, the four of them entered the PUBG team interface. Jing Huan and Xiang Huaizhi were wearing the game's default outfit. The two people around them were garish. Sunglasses, masks, and scarves were all piled on top of them.

Xiang Huaizhi said, "I haven't played for a long time, I might be a bit rusty."

"It's okay," said Jing Huan. "We're all noobs."

Xiang Huaizhi originally thought he was being modest, but very soon, he found out that this underclassman was being sincere.

Just half a minute after landing, the other three members of the team were knocked down by the same player in a nearby factory.

They really were noobs.

Wordlessly, Xiang Huaizhi silently loaded his ammunition and switched the game to first-person perspective.

"Ah ah ah!" Jing Huan was angry. "I shot at him several times! Were you two just watching from the sidelines?!"

Lu Wenhao immediately refuted, "My ass, those shots were obviously from me!"

"They were definitely from me, you know!" Gao Zixiang also refused to back down, "I have even run out of bullets, they couldn't have all completely missed!"

After arguing for a long time, it was still unclear whose shots had actually hit.

Since he had already been killed and turned into a loot box, Jing Huan couldn’t help leaning over towards Xiang Huaizhi’s side.

Seeing that Xiang Huaizhi was still wandering around in the area where they were killed, Jing Huan hurriedly said, “Ge, hurry up and leave, their whole team is here.”

Xiang Huaizhi let out an "En" sound, but had no intention of leaving, "What were the people who killed you guys wearing?"

"White!"

"Light grey!"

"Purple!"

The three of them answered in unison.

Xiang Huaizhi: "…"

Fine, first he'll get rid of the purple one.

Jing Huan had originally thought that the game was over. He was planning on jumping to an area with few people the next match, so that at the very least, he wouldn't get turned into a loot box as soon as he landed.

However, he then saw Xiang Huaizhi rush into the factory with a M762 in his arms, and in half a minute, he had cleared out the entire team.

Jing Huan: "…"

Jing Huan: "?"

That's what you call rusty?

By the end of the game, Xiang Huaizhi had completely killed two teams by himself, and adding in the scattered teams he had run into, one person had killed twelve people all on his own.

Although he didn't win the game, it didn't prevent him from becoming the big man in the eyes of all the 312 dormitory members.

"Holy shit." Lu Wenhao came back to his senses and even changed what he called him. "Great God Xiang, you're really too awesome… You're even more awesome than those streamers! "

Gao Zixiang busily nodded. "That's right, and you were so modest just now…"

Xiang Huaizhi clicked open their stats to take a look.

Sure enough, their rank was very low

Xiang Huaizhi euphemistically said, "Looking at your clothes, I actually thought you were high ranked."

Jing Huan followed him up with, "And you didn't expect that they're just two garish noobs."

Lu Wenhao cursed, "Fuck, you also weren't that great!"

Jing Huan raised his eyebrows. "I'm not the same. My appearance is consistent with my performance."

"…"

Xiang Huaizhi's mouth unconsciously tweaked up, and he smiled.

He's actually quite proud.

Suddenly, his cellphone vibrated, and Xiang Huaizhi took it out to look at it.

Lu Hang: Xiangxiang, why is it taking you so long to go to the convenience store? Come back and help bring me some hot and sour noodles ba. QAQ

Xiang: Order takeout yourself.

Lu Hang: Don't be like that ah T.T. I'm too lazy to go downstairs and get it. >.<

Xiang: ?

Xiang: What emoticons are you using?

Lu Hang: Oh, I found that you seem to really like Xiao Jingjing sending cute emoticons, so I'm willing to change myself for you.

Xiang: Buy it yourself, I'll only be back in the evening.

Lu Hang: Why, where are you going 0.0?

Xiang: Internet bar.

Lu Hang: ??

Lu Hang: What are you doing at an Internet bar? I'm not fun enough? Are you not happy playing games with me in the dorm?

Xiang: Yes.

Xiang: Don't send these emoticons anymore, they don't suit you.

Lu Hang: …..

The four people in the Internet bar played the whole afternoon, and getting hooked, they even ordered take-out and had dinner delivered to them.

At nine o'clock at night, they finally logged off with an unfinished feeling.

It was already so late, so night basketball obviously couldn't happen now.

Half of autumn had passed, and the weather was getting cold. Lu Wenhao had just opened the door of the Internet bar, and he was shocked by the cool breeze that blew at him.

Except for Jing Huan, all of them were wearing short sleeves, and Lu Wenhao was frozen until goose bumps popped up.

"It's so damn cold. Us two are planning to go eat some hot food to warm up," said Gao Zixiang. "Are you guys going?"

Jing Huan didn't really want to go. He glanced at Xiang Huaizhi, and he also shook his head.

"Then Xiang Ge and I will go." Jing Huan also felt a little cold. He shrugged his shoulders. "I'll go home on the way."

Xiang Huaizhi waited until they had left to ask, "You don't live in the dormitory?"

Jing Huan shook his head. "No, I'm renting a house outside."

He was that tight on funds, and he still rented a house outside?

"The school is always stopping water and electricity, I didn't want to live there." Jing Huan finished and jokingly added, "And Lu Wenhao's socks stink, I couldn't stay."

Xiang Huaizhi thought about it and understood.

Although their school dormitory environment was good, most of the boys were casual and undisciplined. It would count as good if they cleaned the dorm once a week. Cockroaches and mice were regular guests in the dormitory.

Today was the weekend, and it was cold that night. There were few people on the path leading to the back gate, and even the number of street vendors had lessened quite a bit.

The two boys walked side by side on the side of the road, two long shadows being stretched out by the street lamp.

Another cold wind blew past, and Jing Huan instinctively shrunk his neck back, turned his head, and said with a smile, "I didn't expect that you would be so good at playing PUBG, you're even better than accompanying players"

Xiang Huaizhi asked, "Accompanying player?"

"Yes," Jing Huan explained, "It's people who charge a fee for playing the game with you."

Xiang Huaizhi of course knew what an accompanying player was, he was just puzzled. "Have you ever gone to find an accompanying player?"

"Yeah, I often do." Jing Huan said frankly, "Because I'm noob."

"…"

Only after a few steps did Xiang Huaizhi evenly ask, "Do you usually go find guy accompanying players or girl accompanying players?"

Jing Huan didn't even think about it before replying, "Definitely guys ah."

This unexpected answer caused Xiang Huaizhi to turn and take a look at him. The wind blew past Jing Huan's hair, revealing a clean and full forehead. His whole person looked more fresh.

"Although right now, I don't really go looking for accompanying players anymore," Jing Huan looked ahead. "It's better to go straight to Xiao Yan's team, which is both stable and exciting."

"Xiao Yan?"

"Yes, the male anchor of Star TV, he's very powerful. The audience calls him Yanyan… He's pretty popular, you haven't heard of him?"

"No." Xiang Huaizhi seldom watched livestreams.

"He plays as awesome as you." Jing Huan's words unconsciously raised up Xiang Huaizhi, "And he's very handsome, just a little worse than you."

Xiang Huaizhi's eyelids drooped a bit. "Really."

His tone carried traces of subtle feelings in it.

"En, I've sent him gifts before. Although it's only just a few thousand yuan and can't rank among his regular supporters, but he still often takes the initiative to play games with me." Jing Huan blinked at him. "He's very popular, so that's how it is."

"…"

Even with Yearning For, he had just made fireworks worth around three figures.

But he had actually sent this male anchor thousands of yuan worth of gifts?

After a long time, Xiang Huaizhi just asked in a light voice, "Thousands of yuan, you don't regret it?"

Jing Huan was flustered, and his two hands swayed unconsciously back and forth. "Not really, I like the anchor a lot."

After a moment's silence, he asked, "Do you still like him?"

"Still like him," Jing Huan replied. Even when he was bored while doing regular instances, he would go have a look to kill some time.

Xiang Huaizhi's eyelids twitched, his face slightly changing.

Okay.

This person was actually straddling two boats.

Then why didn't he go pester that male anchor and instead chose to seek him out?

Jing Huan sighed, "But ever since Xiao Yan has started dating someone, he doesn't stream very much now. "

"….."

It turned out that the other person had already been claimed, and only then had he targeted him.

Thinking back, Xiang Huaizhi just realized that they had met so many times in reality, but Jing Huan had never mentioned the two words "Yearning For" in front of him.

The only time he had mentioned him, it was just as "not that great of a person."

Jing Huan had talked for a long time and hadn't gotten a response. He looked up at him slightly. "Ge?"

Xiang Huaizhi's eyes drooped, shoving down his emotions, "En."

"Were you listening to me just now?"

"Listening."

"Then why ignore me?"

"No, I was thinking about exactly how strong that anchor was." He was so strong that even though he was dating someone now, you still can't forget about him.

"In fact, he's okay. He's pretty quiet, not as annoying as other accompanying players." Jing Huan said casually, "But I prefer to play with you. If you were an accompanying player, I would definitely pick you every single day."

"I don't want to be an accompanying player," Xiang Huaizhi said.

Jing Huan nodded. "I know, I was just saying that…"

"But if you want to play, you can come find me at any time." Xiang Huaizhi added.

Jing Huan smiled.

He's been talking around the subject for so long, just for this one sentence!

"Really? But I'm such a noob, would you not have fun playing with me."

"No," Xiang Huaizhi paused. "But there's one condition."

"En?"

"When you play with me, you can't call over accompanying players, or the anchor." Xiang Huaizhi's tone was as usual. "I don't like playing games with strangers."

Jing Huan's smile just grew wider, "With you around, why would I need to go find accompanying players ah."

Here it was again.

Flattery.

At this time, Jing Huan's trembling right hand accidentally rubbed against him. The back of their hands touched and made a slight rubbing sound.

Xiang Huaizhi slightly froze and wanted to take his hand back, but his wrist was pulled over by the person beside him.

"Ge, your hands are so cold." Jing Huan very naturally wrapped his hand in his palm. "I'll warm you up."

Feeling the heat in his palm, Xiang Huaizhi's throat tightened, and he wanted to pull back his hand: "No need…"

"It's okay. I have a good constitution, and my hands are warm in the winter. Lu Wenhao and them often come to me to keep warm."

Jing Huan gently rubbed his hands twice, looked up, and proudly asked, "Comfortable ba?"

Warmth spread all the way from his fingers to the rest of his body, and even all the cells in his body felt like they were heating up.

Xiang Huaizhi looked at him, and he felt a slight abnormal flutter in his chest. Trying to keep his usual tone, he opened his mouth, but his voice came out much lower than usual.

"En," he said, "Comfortable."

—

Juurensha: In which Huanhuan is inadvertently shameless, and XHZ has to both struggle with his own jealousy and gay panic. (And Yanyan from the author's previous novel gets mentioned again!)

Divi: XHZ's feelings are activating! Look at Huanhuan making those first moves hahaha!

And we have a fanart page!