Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Eguchi Ren: S-somehow I managed to upload it

Offerings to Demiurgos-sama included:

– Japanese sake (5-bottle set from Kochi, Nagano, Yamagata, Yamaguchi & Niigata)

– Hokuriku Plum Wine (for his attendants)

– Potato Sochu Plum Wine

– Brandy Plum Wine

– Premium Canned Goods

– Dried Mackerel

– Dried Golden Eye Snapper

I stared at the 1.8 litre bottles of saké for a moment and sent a brief prayer to Demiurgos-sama’s liver. Please drink in moderation.

As for the dried snacks, well, dried seafood tasted good with rice, therefore they should taste good with saké as well.

After setting up everything on the table, I put my hands together and said, “Please accept this week’s offerings.”

“Oh, we’ve troubled you.”

“No, no, I am indebted to everyone.”

“Fuoh, fuoh, fuoh, many thanks for today’s offerings. Do let me know if any of them make trouble for you. I shall tell them off~”

I appreciate the words, but the ‘~’ at the end of your words makes the statement creepier than it should be.

[1] Desperately trying to change the subject, I blurted out, “Ah, yes, speaking of which, I noticed that Grandpa Gon did not seem to have any kind of Divine Blessing? I have been wondering about it since, as an Ancient Dragon, he should be as powerful as a Fenrir…”

“[1a] Well, in the first place, not all Fenrirs are granted Divine Blessings. Your familiar is Blessed as a follower of Ninril. There had been other powerful creatures under Agni and Ruka that were Blessed as well.”

“I see…”

“Even so, the existence of the Ancient Dragon is a little unique. I created them on a whim when designing this world. [2] Well, rather than design, it was more of a… trial and error process. I was young and still finding my way around, so I created a bunch of different things. They all turned out to be more powerful than expected, fuoh, fuoh fuoh.”

[2a] “… …” I have no idea what Demiurgos-sama was talking about, but it sounded dangerous. It sounded a lot like he had carelessly made loads powerful monsters by accident. That he had made Ancient Dragons so overly strong that they would be too powerful with a Divine Blessing.

Wait, does that mean Ancient Dragons are stronger than Fenrirs?

“Your Fenrir is a special case. In terms of strength, Ancient Dragons are the most powerful. However, your Fenrir has Ninril’s Blessing, and therefore his strength is at par with the Ancient Dragon. I must say, you’ve got yourself a very powerful team, fuoh, fuoh, fuoh,”

[3]

[2a] So, like, why am I hearing all this again? Why are you telling me all this? Why can’t you let me live out the rest of my life not knowing all these unnecessary things?

[4] Wait, can you even create an ‘Ancient Dragon’ back when the world was ‘newly created’ so to speak?

“Umu, naturally, they aren’t ‘ancient’ when the world was created, but they could live up to 20,000 years.”

Ugh, wait, what?

“They can live up to 20,000 years…”

[4a] “!!!!!!!!”

I think… I just made a weird sound.

“Speaking of which, the original Ancient Dragon is called the Primordial Ancient Dragon. That fellow should be your familiar’s ancestor…”

[4b] H-how old is an ‘ancient’ being’s ancestor?

[4b] I carelessly called him ‘Grandpa Gon’ because he gave off a feeling of ageless dignity, it turned out that he acquired that dignity honestly. Through age!!!??

“Indeed, indeed, fuoh, fuoh fuoh~”

“Haahhh…”

“Speaking of which, [3a] ahem, speaking of which, there is something I’m not sure if I should bring up or not…”

[3a]

Eh? What? Why?

“Ahem, Mukouda is a healthy young man in his prime after all. It is perfectly natural to have nightly dreams…”

“Wait, what does- hiiii!!!”

“Fuoh, fuoh, fuoh, no need to be so anxious. It’s all fine~~”

It’s not fine at all…

Urgh, urgh, anyway, let’s change the subject, change the subject!!

[3a]

[4c] “So, uh, is there a reason why Demiurgos-sama created such a powerful creature like Ancient Dragons? Aren’t they a bit of an overkill?” It was a lame attempt at switching subjects, but I’m grasping at straws here. Straws!

[4c] “Well, it mainly serves as a deterrence, and insurance, I supposed…”

Deterrence and insurance? What is this vague answer?

[4c] “Ahem, you understand how even the best-laid plans could go wrong, yes?”

[4a] I thought back to my original leisurely plan to live quietly as a decently well-off merchant selling salt and sugar before I encountered the whirlwind that was Fer the Legendary Beast Fenrir. “Yes, I think so.”

“Moreover, though we are gods, our influence over the people we look after is limited.”

What’s with all this waffling? Still, I played along and said, “…yes?”

“As gods, we sow the seeds at the Beginning and watch over our creation as they grow and mature. As a god, I derived much sorrow and joy watching over my creations. Even so, at times, sorrow tipped over into despair and extreme suffering. Well, that is when the insurance comes in.”

“…come again?”

“As the Master, you must have seen the Ancient Dragon’s status, yes? There is a unique skill called the [Ultimate Magic] Soul of the Ancient Dragon, remember that?”

“[Ultimate Magic] Soul of the Ancient Dragon… I think so…”

“Only one Ancient Dragon in each generation has this unique skill. As the name suggests [Ultimate Magic] Soul of the Ancient Dragon is an ultimate skill, a special world-ending skill that is.”

…hah?

World ending?

The end of the world?

“Haaaahhhhhh!!!!???”

“Fuoh, fuoh, fuoh, do not worry, it is all fine~ this generation’s world-ending dragon appeared to enjoy life as your familiar, therefore he would not entertain thoughts about ending the world. Ah, that’s right, even if an Ancient Dragon uses this [Ultimate Magic] Soul of the Ancient Dragon, it can’t activate without my expressed permission.”

No, no, no, what you’re actually saying is that the world will actually end if YOU allow it?!?!

“Well, even though it may look like it, I am still the Creator God of this world.”

“But, surely that doesn’t mean you have to destroy your own creations?!!!?”

“Fuoh, fuoh, fuoh, it’s all fine. This world is filled with hope and enjoyable things, it won’t end easily.”

“Ugh, well, there’s that Rubanov Kingdom that likes to consider themselves something like a holy land but discriminates against pretty much everyone else. Plus, their priests and bishops are really tacky…”

“It’s fine, idiots will show up so long as enough people gathered together. I look forward to seeing how you will deal with them.”

“Eh? Wait, what was that? Please be reasonable, Demiurgos-sama!!”

“It’s fine, it’s fine, there’s no need to handle them right away. Just clean up those idiots whenever you have the time.”

“No, wait. Aren’t you a god? Can’t you just… I don’t know, give them an oracle or something?”

“Hmm, do you think those scammers would listen to my Word? It’s better to just destroy the lot with overwhelming force.”

“Overwhelming force you say…”

Not reasonable force but ‘overwhelming force’?

Just because I have Fer and Grandpa Gon?

Are you farming off your Godly duties on me?!!

Sure, I’m a transmigrated person from another world, but I don’t even have the ‘Hero’ title!!

“I shall await your great achievement, good things will appear once you’ve completed this mission~~”

“Ah, wait! Demiurgos-sama?!”

“It’s fine to do it when you’re free~~”

With that final remark, Demiurgos-sama disappeared.

“What the heck… what the hell?!? Isn’t this so-called oracle too unreasonable? What do I get out of this anyway? More money? I probably have enough to swim in now. But, seriously, just what can I reasonably expect from a God of Creator when he says ‘good things’?

Will you raise my love luck?

Or give me a bride?

No, no, no, don’t even think about it. This kind of pattern of thought… would only lead to a disaster, a disaster!

…still, could I have a little hope?

Just what do you mean by ‘good things’ Demiurgos-sama!!!

[Gumihou: Poor guy, lol]

[1] It’s unclear why ‘Divine Blessing’ is being brought up out of the blue now? And so awkwardly too? Anyway, let’s ease it into the conversation more naturally.

[1a] Reduce the awkward.

[2] Adjust Demiurgos-sama’s dialogue to better reflect his personality

[2a] Adjust Mukouda’s reaction to reflect these outrageous announcements

[3] Deleted the little exchange about Mukouda complaining about the mind reading and Demiurgos-sama apologising. It just… went nowhere.

[3a] Ok, found out why. Eguchi-san just wanted to make things awkward for Mukouda for thinking about women.

[4] Unsure why the age of the Ancient Dragon is important aside from making Mukouda go hiiiiii!!! So, adjusted the text to reflect this and remove any pretension of seriousness.

[4a] Adjust Mukouda’s reaction to reflect these outrageous announcements

[4b] Deleted scene about Mukouda’s confusion re Grandpa Gon’s name being correct or not, replaced it with more aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

[4c] Okay, found out why Ancient Dragon info is important, but let’s ease into the information, hmm?

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