How to Raise Your Regressor

"So now do you understand why what you did was not just a mere joke?!"

Welcome to the trap, Lecia.

"Somewhat. But the reason I thought of pulling that prank is that I did not understand your pain, no?"

Control, Samur. Don't laugh.

"Of course, you didn't! Someone who has lived a life full of happiness could never understand me or my suffering!" Lecia suddenly got heated up.

Perhaps she's not fond of the idea of not being understood?

Azell frowned the moment he heard that. Neia, on the other hand, seemed to be deep in thought.

I can already imagine what both of them are thinking.

"There's nothing we can do about that, I suppose. However…" I acted like I was hesitating.

"…" She furrowed her brows, as if asking me to continue.

"Are you sure you are not overreacting?"

"…Ha," with widened eyes, Lecia let out a scoff full of disbelief.

Her grip on my collar tightened.

Hmm? How can she grip my collar when I had just taken off my shirt and put it aside, you ask?

That's because I put on another shirt while these idiots were talking. Exhibitionism is not one of my fetishes, after all.

"I mean, it was just a joke, Lecia, grow up. Now, don't get me wrong. I get that you cannot see it that way because of your… painful past, but was there really a need to take it so personally? Like, just how bad could it have been? Isn't it about time that you let go of your past and move on?"

Let's see how much this angers her.

"You fucking dare!" Lecia growled and her expression contorted into wrath. "I was right! Someone like you can never understand!"

Oh, she's fucking pissed, alright. It's like there's a raging sea of fury right beneath her eyes.

"I don't think I need to."

Because I already know- probably better than she does, in fact.

"Right, why would you need to? Someone who's living a nice, happy life like you has no need to understand just how bad my life was, does he?!"

"Exactly."

Let's see how far I can push her. +1000000 points if she just stabs me right here.

"Tell me, was it nice?" She asked.

"Depends on what you're talking about."

Was winning the bet and getting Neia as my personal chef nice? Absolutely.

Was the very act of living nice? Nope, not at all.

"Living a normal, content life. Was it nice?"

"Uhh…"

I'm sorry Lecia, but it's not pleasant in any fucking way.

"It must have been, right? While I was treated as a mere tool just because of a skill I never even wanted, you must have been loved for just being yourself. Your parents must have showered you with love, you must have had friends you spent your day with, you must have eaten delicious food every day, you must have been praised for achieving the smallest of things, right?"

"I guess?"

She's not exactly right, but let's agree to disagree. Also, is it just me, or are her hands slowly approaching neck?

Keep your choking tendencies in check, Lecia. I want to be stabbed, not choked in a non-sexual way.

"No wonder you cannot understand!" She brought her face so close to me that our noses were almost touching.

However, within her eyes, a sea full of madness was swirling.

Looks like she has lost it.

"While I was forced to heal others while feeling pain that made me want to die, while I was made to save others even though I myself could not be saved, you must have been pleased with your happy life. You must have looked forward to each day, huh?"

Hmm, is it just me, or is she kinda blaming me?

"And that's why even though you did such terrible things, you could not think of your actions as anything more than a joke! While I was falling into despair, you were laughing to yourself for pulling a fast one over me, right?!"

If she thinks that I'll giggle to myself like a maiden in love after pranking a dumb foetus, then she's absolutely right.

Get fucked, big gurl.

"Not exactly," I lied.

"Right, it's always because of people like you!" Lecia exclaimed, making an expression as if she had just discovered the secret of this Universe.

"What?"

The fuck is she talking about now?

"Everyone who ruined my life was someone who could not understand others' pain, just like you! I bet you're going to do the same- no, you have already done it, haven't you?"

And now she has lost me. She was making sense before, to the point that I was feeling kinda proud, but her logic is all over the place now.

A shame.

"We are both just children who joined the New Dawn Guild at the same time, so why was it that you who got everything in life and I had nothing but despair!?"

Probably because I created the very concept of life?

"You are just a narcissistic piece of shit! You cannot see anyone other than yourself, so why was it you that got all the happiness?! I deserve it more than you!" She burst into tears (ew).

Lecia might be spouting some absolute bullshit right now, but damn she's passionate. It's almost commendable.

Almost.

Like I said, ultimately, it's all dogshit that makes absolutely zero sense.

"It's all your fault! It's all your fucking fault!"

Wow.

"Lecia…" Azell put his hand on her shoulder, and Lecia turned around to face him, thus letting go of my collar.

Finally.

Azell briefly glanced at me, his eyes showing a mix of confusion and pity.

Oh shit, this fucker is going to ruin everything.

"You are wrong. Samur has never-"

"Genius!" I exclaimed loudly while clapping my hands, thus cutting Azell off.

Phew, nice save.

Azell and Neia looked at me with a face that said that, 'What the fuck?'.

"What?" Lecia turned back to me sporting the same expression as the other two.

"Lecia, I'm genuinely in awe of your genius. I truly am. It's just," I gave a chef's kiss. "You've changed my perspective on life. I finally know how wrong I was, all thanks to you."

"…" Lecia scowled at me.

"I mean, blaming me for what happened to you and for me being unable to understand your pain just because I have lived a different, albeit happier life than you, even though the degree of happiness of my childhood is based totally on the circumstances of my birth which I have absolutely no control over?"

"S-Samur…" Neia tried stopping me, but couldn't.

"Jesus fucking christ, I would have never even thought about that. But in hindsight, how could a filthy mortal like me even imagine seeing this situation from such an unorthodox angle, right? You have just opened my third eye. You've helped me ascend into a higher form of dimension, and for that, I'm truly thankful to you, Lady Lecia."

"…" Her jaw clenched as her entire body trembled.

"I do have a question, however. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying you're wrong or anything.. I mean, really, far be it from me to question your… divine intellect, but I just have to ask. Why me?"