Florida Man's General Store in Cultivation World

Chapter 191 – Florida Man Sued Dead Pro-War Rioters for Raiding His Shopping Mall and Got Shot to Death by His Employees.

"Oh, dear. They have done it, munya. Who's going to help them, munya?"

On the mystic realm portal platform, the three statues laughed at the invaders. They looked at each other.

The black-winged angel shrugged, "Rock, paper, scissors?"

The Cathulhu disagreed, "That's not fair, munya. I can only do tentacles. Pick another method, munya."

The Fenrir also panted and stuck out his tongue, pretending ignorance, "You want my paws, woof?"

"…"

As they didn't feel the necessity of participating in this fight, the trio pushed the responsibility to each other. However, as they had the same mind, they couldn't come to an agreement. 

The angel facepalmed. He then glanced at his three concubines, including the new member. Qiang Qiang, who lost her soul and was converted into a stone golem, still sat on the angel's lap. Her apathetic gaze stared into the distance.

Meowmeow patted the girl's head. Then, he injected a fragment of her soul back.

Qiang Qiang's body jolted as if she was electrocuted. A second later, she looked around and found her new master. Instead of panicking or making a fuss, she nodded at Meowmeow.

She lost all her previous memory. The only instinct of Qiang Qiang was to follow this angel's instructions.

After converting Qiang Qiang into a complete slave, Meowmeow gave her the first order.

"New order for you. You will serve Lord Florida Man as your new master as he is also my master. For now, I want you to take the elevator to the first floor. When you arrive, you will pretend to be a fountain statue at the entrance of the shopping mall. If intruders manage to break in from the front, it will be your duty to stop them. Got it?"

Qiang Qiang nodded. She got down from the angel's lap and shrank her physique. With determination, she entered the elevator and got down to the first floor.

.

.

Upon Qiang Baidu's signal, the mutant army charged toward the nightmares and thunder unicorns. None of them was afraid of the monsters.

Taxi transformed into a human with a unicorn horn. The silver horn glowed and fired a yellow thunderbolt at the incoming quasi-immortal mutant.

The lightning bolt hit the demonic cultivator, but he came out unharmed. The mutant roared and manifested his flame axe. He swung down, aiming at Taxi's head.

CLINK

Taxi parried the strike with his horn. While he was at it, he pulled out his rifle and pointed at the mutant's face.

"SMASH!"

Unlike the naïve Dullahan, Taxi had been through countless battles in the mystic realm. He knew when he should unleash an all-out attack to finish off a strong enemy.

He injected the sacred wood bullet into the chamber with yellow lightning energy. Then, he pulled the trigger.

BOOM

The rifle and sacred wood bullet amplified the energy and unleashed an orange laser beam.

Getting shot in the face, the quasi-immortal's head and upper shoulders melted. His soul was pulverized without a chance to recover.

Just like that, Taxi claimed the first kill. He then exhaled a long fume of white smoke from his mouth.

"Smash!" (Get them, boys!)

Learning from their pack leader, the other thunder unicorns transformed into naked humans. As they had prepared freshly-made rifles from the gunsmith workshop, everybody armed themselves and aimed at the sky.

BOOM

BOOM

BOOM

49 orange beams ascended to the sky and devoured unlucky mutants in their paths. The proud quasi-immortal mutants fell one after another. However, the majority of them dodged the attack with ease.

After one volley, they instantly downed 6 quasi-immortal mutants and 600 soldiers.

The unicorns reloaded their guns and prepared to shoot again. But then, they discovered the problem with their rifles – The gun muzzles were bright red!

"SMASH!" (Someone go fetch new boomsticks! We can't use these again!)

The unicorns were smart. They realized that the rifles got overheated after they forcefully injected their yellow lightning energy into the gun chambers. 20 of them kicked the ground and chose to fight in close combat while the rest stayed on the ground, shooting lightning bolts at their enemies instead.

One of Taxi's comrades rushed into the store. He ignored the panicking disciples and went to the gunsmith.

"Smash!" (I'll borrow these!)

The guy grabbed as many guns as he could and rushed out to supply his friends.

"…"

The two mannequins in the workshop only glanced at the naked unicorn man. After which, they shook their heads and continued crafting more rifles and bullets.

.

In the sky, Ricardo and 49 Nightmares didn't bother using Leo's guns. They all transformed into muscular bronze men with black unicorn horns on their foreheads. Strangely, after they had transformed, they all wore a red bandanna and tight bikini underwear.

Seeing the charging army, Ricardo turned around and made a pose. The others also did the same as if they choreographed the moves. Then, they sexily turned back and smiled at the invaders. Again, the entire team was in sync, busting a move in unison.

"…"

The group of quasi-immortal mutants and soldiers had goosebumps. Because of the weird vibe and air of these bronze unicorn men, their movements slowed down by a beat.

At that moment, the mannequins on the shopping mall's rooftop struck. They loaded their guns with spirit stones and fired small laser beams at the soldiers behind the quasi-immortals.

All recycling center's mannequins stared at their enemies with glowing bloody lenses. Their joints crackled while they reloaded new spirit stone bullets, which were freshly minted from the recycling machine. Because their residual Qi was 100 times thicker than standard spirit stones, these new bullets were slightly better than the regular sacred wood bullets from the gunsmith.

"AAAAAHHHH!"

Because the attack was not as flashy as the massive laser, it caught the backline soldiers off guard. Every shot always hit a person.

A soul transformation mutant's physique was as sturdy as a quasi-immortal cultivator. Although they were shot, none of them died on the spot. Instead, they circulated their elemental essence into their wounds to regenerate their flesh.

Their usual techniques would have worked had Hua Jiashan or others used the same guns and bullets. However, the sharpshooters were mannequins of Leo, who were created from his system. Combined with the special spirit stones, the bullets were perfect catalysts for the system mannequins to borrow Leo's power.

The wounds on the soul transformation mutants turned black. Instead of mending or recovering, they got infected.

They thought they had the superior physique of a demon. They thought they had graduated from being a mortal. However, the contagious flesh-mutating virus from the bullets broke the bubbles and taught them the harsh reality of this universe.

The bullets of mannequins could mutate people the same way when they touched objects or living beings!

"NOOOOO!!"

Their bodies uncontrollably swelled and bloated. Some of their guts imploded and gushed out from their orifices. Moreover, their nascent souls couldn't be ejected from their fresh bodies!

The mannequins leisurely fired more rounds. As they had a hivemind, none of them shot the same person twice.

After launching two volleys, the enemy troops reached them. Two hundred soul transformation cultivators landed on the rooftop while a thousand got behind the shopping mall building. As for the quasi-immortals, they got entangled in close combat against the unicorn men.

The mannequins dispersed. They leaped in all directions while they shot more mutants in mid-air. One of them tackled a nearby mutant and put a bullet in the latter's head. Afterward, he showed the most disrespectful behavior by twerking close to the enemy's face during the mutation process.

No one had the luxury time to scold the ill-mannered mannequin. Everybody chased after the gun robots in anger.

Unfortunately, the mannequins didn't know how to fly. As they could only jump and leap, most of them got caught. The mutants pummeled them and attempted to break their bodies into pieces.

The mannequins expressionlessly endured the assaults even though various Qi skills and palms crushed their limbs and torso in half. Their bodies reddened. Then, they exploded.

Black flame emerged from the self-detonating mannequins and devoured the soul transformation cultivators on top of them. Several hundred demonic cultivators died on the spot.

"SMASH!!"

The destruction and the explosions distracted Taxi and Ricardo. Both horsemen bellowed in anger, thinking that they had just lost their comrades.

But the next moment, the hidden feature of the system domain was activated. A portion of iron pine logs in the junkyard automatically moved and fell into the acidic liquid of the recycling center's pool. Instead of the pool melting the log into spirit stones, the wood turned into worker mannequins that had died earlier.

Their red lens gleamed as all of them retained their memory. Their hivemind also learned from their mistakes and discovered new tactics that they could use.

CRACK-CRACK

The newly respawned mannequins rushed back to where they had died and grabbed their guns. They resumed shooting at the invaders around the shopping mall, protecting Leo's headquarters.

The surrounding mutants noticed their emergence. At first, everybody thought they were hidden soldiers from Leo's building. As they also learned from their comrade's mistakes, the mutants threw dao avatar attacks from a long-range, preventing their suicide bomb attack tactic.

Several mannequins exploded into black flame upon destruction. But again, they quickly consumed logs from the junkyard and came back to life.

One of the quasi-immoral mutants noticed the commotion. He also spotted how the acid pool produced new mannequins. Despite being in combat against a unicorn man, he ordered his subordinates.

"DESTROY THAT POOL AND THAT MACHINE! THEY ARE PRODUCING THE GOLEMS!"

Two hundred soul transformation cultivators descended from the sky and hurled 5,000 fireballs at the structure.

RUMBLE

Flame erupted, and the building was caught on fire. However, the pool and the recycling machine were still intact.

BANG

Suddenly, a cat-eared mannequin walked out from the shopping mall, wearing the domain's black suit uniform. She also carried a dozen sets of black suits, and she rushed toward the recycling center. Unafraid of random attacks from above, she passed the suit to the newly respawned mannequins.

BOOM

One of the fireballs hit her back. Fortunately, the suit neutralized the damage to her body. Still, the impact staggered her forward.

As soon as the clothing store mannequin stumbled, the male mannequins flinched. Their expression turned dark as if a hoodlum assaulted their girlfriend.

CRACKLE

Despite being angry, they put on the new uniform. As if the clothing store mannequin knew about their weaknesses, she also made them gloves and cloth masks.

After putting everything on, they became ninjas in a business suit. Everybody returned to the battlefield.

The clothing store mannequin nodded in approval and fled to the shopping mall, avoiding the battle. However, several hundred eyes noticed her actions, and they followed after her.

Instantly, the mutants found the back entrance of the shopping mall.

"FOLLOW THAT DAMN GOLEM! KILL EVERYBODY INSIDE!"

The soul transformation mutants threw their attacks at the main building next. More explosions enveloped the shopping mall building. However, the glass windows and the walls were unaffected by their strikes.

BOOM

A black statue suddenly blasted out from the backdoor of the shopping mall. She then transformed back to her original size.

Qiang Qiang, the new gargoyle statue, made her debut as Leo's shopping mall guardian. She looked around and opened her four arms. Then, she clenched her fists.

CRACK

A domain ability of Qiang Qiang was unleashed. Five hundred soul transformation soldiers above the recycling centers and a dozen men behind the shopping mall were squeezed by something invisible. Their bodies were crushed like pancakes.

However, Qiang Qiang's ability wasn't omnipotent. Despite killing so much, she couldn't use it repeatedly. After releasing her hands, Qiang Qiang's arms cracked. She glanced at her cracking stone arms for a moment and concentrated on healing her new physique.

While healing, one of the invaders recognized her. He screamed.

"LADY QIANG QIANG?!"

.

.

"Why are they so noisy outside?"

Gao Yan opened his eyes. He had eaten Leo's Floridian Dantian Pill, and he hadn't fully digested the pill effects yet. However, his cultivation advanced to the soul formation realm, aka the 6th-stage. He was one stage below the soul transformation realm.

Although Gao Yan was not ready to come out of the seclusion, he paused his cultivation schedule and stepped out of his house.

As soon as he came out, a quasi-immortal's headless corpse fell from the sky and landed in front of him, splashing blood on his face. Taxi also descended and stomped the dead body for good measure.

Taxi then noticed Gao Yan. He smiled at the guy.

"Smash?" (What's up, amigo? Did you just wake up?)

Gao Yan wryly smiled, "What's happening here?"

Taxi pointed to the sky. Gao Yan looked up.

"Oh."

The nightmares were in combat against quasi-immortals in the sky while Taxi's unicorns battled another group on the ground. However, thousands of soul transformation mutants rained upon the main store's building.

A hundred of them rushed toward Gao Yan. One of them summoned his titan dao avatar and was about to punch Gao Yan.

The teenager didn't bother looking at the titan avatar. He pulled out a pistol from his belt and pulled the trigger, aiming at the real body of the giant without looking.

BANG

Leo's pistol was more powerful than the mass-produced rifles. Even though Gao Yan only loaded sacred wood bullets in his magazine, it had more destructive power than the mannequin's version.

The soul transformation mutant died instantly, body and soul!

BANG-BANG-BANG-BANG-BANG-BANG

As if Gao Yan's hands were possessed, he rapidly pulled the trigger and adjusted his aim after every shot. Within one second, he emptied the magazine. 14 more mutants fell from the sky.

Gao Yan yawned, but his hands reloaded a new magazine in less than a second. He looked at Taxi while he fired 15 more shots at the sky.

"Do I need to fight? I have to go back and cultivate some more?"

Taxi shrugged.

"Smash?" (Can you help? We're under manpower here.)

"I need more bullets. I have like… 5 more mags, maybe?"

CLICK

After finishing that sentence, Gao Yan reloaded the second mag and emptied the chamber in the next second.

In a flash, Gao Yan already killed 45 invaders without even looking.

Taxi smirked at Gao Yan.

"Smash!" (I'll tell my boy to fetch you some ammo.)

"Thanks."

Taxi kicked the ground and tackled another quasi-immortal nearby. He and his colleague proceeded to stomp the poor guy to death.

Gao Yan snickered and pulled out a lightsaber. He tossed it in front of him and controlled it with his Qi.

WHOOM

The activated lightsaber floated in mid-air, acting as Gao Yan's flying sword. He reloaded another mag and continued firing.

"Hwuaah. I'm kinda sleepy. I want to go back to my dream world and train again."

The Floridian Dantian Pill was at work. Gao Yan already spent a hundred years in his dream training in various firearms. It was a matter of time before he became immortal John Wick.