Everybody is Kung Fu Fighting, While I Started a Farm

Panda Novel

“The mansion I planted in the wee hours of the morning had just sprouted. That’s quite a slow growth rate… I wonder if it would mature by the evening.”

Jiang He complained, holding back the idea of planting a maid right now. “Let’s wait until the mansion is grown.”

Stepping out of his yard, Jiang He found the village in silence and felt a little lonely just then. There would usually be children chasing each other and playing at this hour, and a bunch of old folks playing poker and chess under the willow trees beside the green belt.

The old madam next door would be walking the streets, looking for other women to gossip with.

But now.

There was only nothingness.

Jinyintan Village was now an uninhabited village.

Breathing a long-sigh, Jiang He shook his head and laughed bitterly. “Are you already bored, Jiang He? How many days had it been?”

“This is how elites should be!”

“I would only develop if I could bear the isolation… that said, when could my farm be upgraded to mobile space?”

“I could leave when I level up… only an idiot would stay in this village!”

After all, the neon lights of the city were very beautiful, and the chicks of the city center sweet.

Taking out one of his folding chairs, Jiang He sat beneath a willow tree beside the green belt. Whipping out his phone and turning on WeChat, he found some unread messages from Duan Tianhe.

He clicked on it to find a website.

However, every time he tried to open the URL, WeChat would warn him that it was a ‘dangerous website’.

“…”

Jiang He was at a loss for words.

Had that old-timer Duan Tianhe sent him some age-restricted stuff?

Was it not supposed to the Warrior Home forums? Why is it categorized as a dangerous website?

Still, being a former intellectual of online videos, that little bit of work wouldn’t trouble Jiang He. Clicking to copy to URL, he pasted it on the browser and clicked ‘download website’, and a dialogue box promptly popped up.

It was the login panel.

“Why is there no registration button? Do I force a login?”

Jiang He keyed in his own ID, and the option of setting a password popped up. It was especially troublesome since it still required video verification, winking, showing his teeth, looking right and left—just like an imbecile.

Nonetheless, he cleared it after much difficulty.

But after he logged in, he still had to go through a real-name check system.

Even so, Jiang He understood that, since during the multiple occasions when Duan Tianhe mentioned the Warrior Home forum, it was supposed to be a platform for exchange between martial artists and Awakened across the country in the future. There, they would conduct trade for cultivation resources, weapons, combat suits, cultivation method, and secret text, which was why a real-name check system was the most basic of checks.

But is it not a little too much to get a nickname as well?!

Jiang He was not good when it came to names, and was not bothered to think too much, so he simply combined several letters and numbers.

Entering the forum, he saw the name ‘Warrior Home’ calligraphed on the top right of the main page, with a logo of two crossed blades underneath it.

There was a horizontal bar beneath the logo, inside of each were red bold font.

[Team Blitz official formed. Recruiting three martial artists and one Awakened. Specific requirements are as below…]

[Help: I’ve awakened fire-type powers but my control is bad, and I keep burning my clothes. What should I do?]

[WTS: A rank-seven Feral that recently gave birth, and is in weakened state…]

Jiang He looked around.

The forum itself felt like one of the shoutout systems in various games. New posts would be given priority, but posting here was more expensive than the shoutout items in game, since a single merit point was equal to ten thousand dollars.

Underneath the horizontal bar were buttons labeled ‘cultivation manual trade’, ‘weapons trade’, ‘secondhand items exchange’ and ‘Feral materials’, and those were easier to understand.

It was the same thing like filters in other websites such as ‘language’, ‘HD image’ and ‘GIF image’.

Jiang He clicked on cultivation manual trade, entering the block.

There were already hundreds of posts inside, and it appeared that there were many members in Warrior Home already. Two or three of the cultivation manuals were actually self-made, while most others were a family inheritance.

Jiang He scanned through them, but most were plain and average, especially the self-made ones. Even Jiang He could find several flaws that would cause major problems if cultivated carelessly, and since he could not find a button for ‘report’, he decided to call Duan Tianhe tomorrow to talk about it.

Was cultivation a joke?

How could blindly created cultivation method even be used?

Still, the officially sold cultivation manuals available at Warrior Home surprised Jiang He. There were thousands of them, with a wide range of categories, from sword, palm, fist, foot to inner strength.

“Oh?”

“That palm-technique… Stonebreak Palm? That was the manual I got from Killer Star, but it’s sold as much as two thousand merit points?”

Jiang He was taken aback.

That thing was actually so expensive?

After all, 2,000 merit points was equal to twenty million dollars!

“How much did the Martial Arts Department (MAD) bring it from me back then again… Anyway, those bunch are so sly. Such cutthroats!”

Jiang He complained inwardly.

He checked out the larger tabs, and wrote a post [WTB mutated plants, fruits, vegetables and seeds within the country (permanent post)]. Then, he went on to check his personal data.

It shows that he is a rank-six martial artist, his superpower being ‘beast-taming’ and rank was ‘possible B’.

Jiang He then looked beneath the rank to check his merit points, which now totaled up to 35,900.

That was not much.

According to the exchange of 1 merit point for 10,000 dollars, he only had three hundred and fifty million, which was not too useful.

Moreover, he saw nothing he liked from the items available for sale on the forum.

“I could keep the points, but I wonder if there’s a high-interest rate loaning scheme for it… like the type where you lend a thousand but I only give you eight hundred, and you still have to repay me a thousand…”

Jiang He thought about it, but decided it was not worth it.

What if the loans he granted were not repaid?

Still, he was not worried that he did not have the ability to collect his debts, since there was a high-risks in being martial artists or Awakened in the first place. What if his debtors suddenly kicked the bucket? Was he supposed to chased him all the way down to hell to collect his debt?

1

***

After Jiang He had slapped away his own mansion with his palm, the simple kitchen he had before was gone too.

1

Afternoon arrived, and so Jiang He had to stick to his old habits and have smoked Leopard Python meat.

One must admit that the System Backpack was wonderful. Even though the Leopard Python’s flesh had been stuffed inside for so long, it was still tender and sweet as if it had just left the butcher’s shop, with no decay whatsoever.

But even as he ate, Jiang He sighed.

Days when he had nothing to do was quite a bore…

“I’m actually not used to the Sky Demon Cult not bothering me,” he mumbled and laughed bitterly. Forget it. After I finished eating, I’ll plant a maid. And if that succeeds, I’ll plant too more, so that I’ll have company for mahjong and fight the landlord when I get bored!”