Back Then, I Adored You

Translator: Nyoi-Bo Studio  Editor: Nyoi-Bo Studio

Qin Jiayan had learned at a young age that he had to depend on himself for everything, but right now he had actually brought up Gu Yusheng.

No one knew that he had made exceptions for Su Qing time and again because he was so afraid that she would turn him down.

No one knew that the words that he had said earlier were his desperate pleas for her to leave with him.

He was no longer the impulsive youth that he had been back then, who had simply asked her to stay when he hadn’t wanted her to leave. Now, he knew what he needed to do to convince her.

Ultimately, though, he was still wrong. No matter what kind of a bright path he paved for her, she didn’t have the slightest intention of walking it with him, and she directly cut him off before he could finish speaking. “Jiayan, it’s over between us, and it has been for 12 years. It’s impossible for me to be with you again.”

I cannot allow myself to be swayed. I truly have no route by which to retreat anymore. If I am moved by his words, what we would face would be a scene beyond redemption.

I need to get him to give up on me and to drop the idea completely.

Within a second, Su Qing spoke again in such a calm voice that she sounded as though she was not talking about herself. “Jiayan, if you truly want to be with me, I can allow you to be my lover, but I cannot divorce my husband. You understand that my husband will not touch me. I also want to…”

Ultimately, there were things that Su Qing could not bring herself to say, and she had already shared enough at this point, so she stopped talking.

And as she had expected, fury burned in Qin Jiayan’s eyes.

He clutched her shoulders with a shocking amount of force, causing pain to shoot down her entire back.

After a while, he then seemed to force himself to say, “Lover? You can’t divorce?”

And then his rage turned into laughter. “So, you mean that because your husband won’t touch you, you can look for another man to satisfy you physical needs?”

Su Qing remained silent, but she nodded her head gently with a calm expression on her face.

Her simple action completely overturned all the expectations that Qin Jiayan had held in his heart.

She would rather remain in the Lin family and be abused by Lin Mo than leave with me.

My heart ached relentlessly when I saw how terrible her life had become, and I wanted to give her a better life, but she completely doesn’t care about my help.

So it seems that it was just my one-sided wishful thinking.

Twelve years ago, I was a fool for her. Twelve years later, I was still a fool for her.

I constantly wanted to play the hero in her world, but she doesn’t give a damn… I treated her with sincerity, but she has been completely disdainful!

That’s it… That’s it… That’s the last straw!

Perhaps I should have known 12 years ago that she was not the girl whom I should love. She was only a girl whom I stubbornly set my eyes on and believed to be the most wonderful girl in the world. I was too obstinate.

Qin Jiayan shut his eyes and sucked in a deep breath of air before he slowly opened them and gradually released her shoulders. He pointed to outside the car and said curtly, “Get out.”

Without a single word, Su Qing pushed open the car door and got out.

She’s so sure of herself, even when she leaves.

A deep sense of desperation grew in Qin Jiayan’s heart.

I can finally give up on her. From now on, I will harbor no more hope toward her ever again. I will start anew.

Su Qing, I must have been crazy to have thought about you for all these years!

As this thought crossed Qin Jiayan’s mind, he abruptly slammed his foot on the accelerator and sped off.