i'm not a bad man
Chapter 10
Chapter 10
After being lost for a moment, Lu Xi finally started the car. This time, she didn't stop any longer. Under my gaze, she quickly drove towards the intersection full of grass. In the blink of an eye, she merged into the lights, distinguishing herself. I don’t know where she came from and where she is going...
The moment she disappeared completely, my heart became empty, and the huge city of Qingdao became an empty city in my eyes; it was this night that I solved all the unresolved problems before, and when the contradictions After it ceased to exist and the relationship between the characters was dissolved, this city was of course empty to me.
It's time for me to go, now... I don't want to face the lights on the other side of the island alone, nor do I want to change my habits in this city; my nights are either in a nightclub or on the way to a nightclub, absolutely not I would sit alone in the RV and feel dejected.
……
I put away the awning outside the RV, put away the folding lounge chairs, and then sat in the car, ready to leave...
I don't know when, a light rain suddenly started to fall outside the car window, and the temperature began to drop sharply. I turned on the wiper, and looked towards the sea. The place where there was moonlight was already covered by dark clouds.
I shook my head first, and then smiled bitterly. This sudden change probably hinted to me that during the year and a half in Qingdao, it looked sunny, but in fact it was gloomy and dull. I was really not very happy.
……
The car's headlights came on as the engine vibrated. I put one hand in gear, stepped on the clutch with one foot, and quickly turned the car around.
I didn't take another look, let alone linger, and quickly drove the car towards the overgrown intersection...
When I was about to get on the elevated track, the cell phone in the storage compartment rang again. I was really curious as to who else would call me when I was about to leave.
I slowed down the car and took out my phone from the storage compartment. But it was not the group of friends I met in the bar. The call was from Ba Xiaoguang.
Ba Xiaoguang is my workmate. We once did the decoration work of a villa together. He was a master carpenter and I worked behind him as a handyman. We worked together for more than four months. Later, this villa After the project was completed, he went to a new construction site, and I hung out in the bar, and we had little contact with him after that.
In my memory, the last time we met was half a year ago. That time, I called him to the bar and he was supposed to treat me, but in the end he took advantage of me to go to the bathroom and paid the bill himself...
It was nothing, but before he left, he said something to me, which made me never contact him again: He said that he was just a migrant worker, and he and I were not the same kind of people. Neither is a friend. If this happens again in the future, don’t call him that again...
At that time, I was very embarrassed and didn’t know how to reply for a long time. At this time, he told me with a smile: His wife was pregnant for three months. He was busy supporting his family and didn’t bother to make friends so that I could have some time with him. When you have free time, just go to his place and sit...
I was a little confused, but thinking about it afterwards: I felt that he still regarded me as a friend, but he was limited by his vision and knowledge and could not express himself so completely, so some words he said could easily offend others, but I didn't take it seriously, but I didn't contact him again, let alone go to his place... because we were really not the same kind of people, and I didn't want to cause him any trouble... I still remember that day at the bar, he didn't say much the whole night. In short, even though we were having fun, he paid the bill in the end... Isn't this just causing trouble for him?
At this moment, he took the initiative to call me, and I couldn't help but be a little surprised; I was even thinking: Could it be that he had moved and wanted to invite me to his house for a drink?I remember that when we were working together, he always told me that when he got rich in the future, he would buy a house in Qingdao so that his wife and children could have a place to live without having to follow him around. You must have a drink with me to celebrate...
I muttered: It’s not that easy to buy a house in Qingdao, right?
With such doubts, I answered his call: "Hello, Xiaoguang..."
I don't know what happened, but he didn't speak, and the atmosphere suddenly became a bit depressing.
"Xiaoguang, is the signal over there not good? Can you hear me?"
Still silent, but I could hear his heavy breathing.
I drove the car to the side of the road and turned off the engine; finally, he said: "Brother... can you lend me 6000 yuan?"
"Did something happen to you?"
Ba Xiaoguang's voice was trembling: "My wife gave birth prematurely and is now in the hospital, waiting for a caesarean section... The doctor asked me to pay 6000 yuan for the surgery... I can't get a penny out now... If you have any , can you lend it to me first?"
If I was only surprised by Ba Xiaoguang's call at first, I am shocked now... I can't imagine an adult who has been given the mission of carrying on the family lineage, but when this moment is coming, he loses his life because he can't raise the surgery fee. He was so confused and beating his chest in the hospital... I can't imagine what a hard-working man has gone through that would make him unable to even pay 6000 yuan for surgery at this urgent moment... I must I need to go to the hospital to see him.
"Okay, I'll transfer the money to you...you pay the surgery fee first."
Without waiting for Ba Xiaoguang to say thank you, I hung up the phone and transferred 6000 yuan to him using WeChat. After he sent over the location of the hospital, I turned around and drove toward the city again. …
Half an hour later, I arrived at the hospital and headed straight to the fifth floor... I saw Ba Xiaoguang in the corridor of the hospital. At this moment, he was leaning against the wall, eyes closed tightly, looking haggard.
It wasn't until I called his name that he opened his eyes.I looked around and asked him, "Are you alone?"
"Ah."
"Have they arranged surgery for their siblings?"
"Ah."
I put my hand on his shoulder to express comfort and encouragement: "That's good...how long will the surgery take?"
Ba Xiaoguang shook his head blankly, not sure whether he was numb or frightened.I stopped a passing nurse and asked, only to find out that it would take four to five hours, and only four and ten minutes had passed... This means that I have to wait here with Ba Xiaoguang for at least three hours. Enough for us to have a good chat.
……
I went to the vending machine and bought two bottles of mineral water. I handed one of the bottles to Ba Xiaoguang, signaling him to drink some water to relieve his nervousness.He is indeed too nervous. In this state, there is no way to have a good conversation.
Ba Xiaoguang subconsciously took it from my hand, but didn't drink it. I told him it was mineral water, and he realized it. Then he unscrewed the cap of the bottle and drank half the bottle with a "gudong, gudong" sound. After drinking it, he started to drink heavily again. Panting...
After he calmed down a little, I asked: "Xiaoguang, how long has it been since we last met?"
"Half a year."
"Half a year is neither short nor long. How can you...?"
Ba Xiaoguang finally looked at me. For the first time, I saw tears in his eyes. In my mind, he has never been a person who likes to show his emotions in front of others. We have worked together for more than four months. Sometimes, When his employer says unpleasant things, he always laughs it off. Sometimes I want to help him out, but he always advises me to endure it, saying that suffering a loss is a blessing... But at this moment, he can't bear it anymore. , he must have encountered something extremely difficult.
"Brother... I really had no other options, so I asked you to borrow money."
"This is obvious. You should know in your heart that I have always regarded you as a friend... tell me what happened. You are not a lazy person. How come you are at this time? You can't even pay 6000 yuan." Can’t even get the money out?”
The corner of Ba Xiaoguang's mouth was trembling, and suddenly he couldn't hold it anymore. He cried bitterly and said to me: "I can't understand it. I wish I could die of exhaustion on the construction site every day. I get up at six in the morning to work and go to work at ten in the evening." I just went back...how did it become like this?...Brother, during these three years in Qingdao, I really saved money. After we finished the villa work, I still have a deposit of 15 on my card... ...As long as I work harder, I can save 20 by the Chinese New Year no matter what. I have agreed with my wife that I will buy a car first and then drive the car back with my children during the Chinese New Year. The elderly on both sides will be able to feel proud and proud. I felt that I had hope for the future... However, last month, my dad was diagnosed with sepsis... I gave all the 15 to my family, and borrowed it from all my relatives and friends who could borrow money... In the end, the money It’s still not enough…I’m in a dilemma now, I really don’t know how to survive…”
I probably have been degenerate for too long and don’t understand the sufferings of the world. Suddenly, a person who was tortured by fate appeared next to me. While I felt awake, I was also a little suffocated. It took me a long time before I became silent. He said to him: "I can't enlighten you on this matter... I can only say that as a man, you should grit your teeth and persevere..."
"I can't bite anymore, I really can't bite anymore..."
Ba Xiaoguang sat down and I held his arm, and he kept repeating this sentence, his voice getting smaller and smaller, but more and more tears flowed, and finally he burst into tears again...
There is no such thing as empathy in this world, so those who were disturbed by his cries all cast very unfriendly eyes towards him.
I sighed softly and took out another 4000 yuan in cash from my pocket. This cash was prepared in case there was an extreme situation on the road and I couldn't use my mobile phone to pay...
"Xiaoguang, let's not think too far ahead. Let's start with the things at hand first... The child is born, and both adults and children need to take care of themselves. Take these 4000 yuan. The child is the most important thing. As long as the child is healthy, hope will be there." …”
With that said, I stuffed the 4000 yuan into his pocket.Although roses given to others leave a lingering fragrance in their hands, I still lost my mind in Ba Xiaoguang’s cry. I knew: I am afraid I really won’t be able to leave Qingdao this time; because my pocket is already empty!
(End of this chapter)
After being lost for a moment, Lu Xi finally started the car. This time, she didn't stop any longer. Under my gaze, she quickly drove towards the intersection full of grass. In the blink of an eye, she merged into the lights, distinguishing herself. I don’t know where she came from and where she is going...
The moment she disappeared completely, my heart became empty, and the huge city of Qingdao became an empty city in my eyes; it was this night that I solved all the unresolved problems before, and when the contradictions After it ceased to exist and the relationship between the characters was dissolved, this city was of course empty to me.
It's time for me to go, now... I don't want to face the lights on the other side of the island alone, nor do I want to change my habits in this city; my nights are either in a nightclub or on the way to a nightclub, absolutely not I would sit alone in the RV and feel dejected.
……
I put away the awning outside the RV, put away the folding lounge chairs, and then sat in the car, ready to leave...
I don't know when, a light rain suddenly started to fall outside the car window, and the temperature began to drop sharply. I turned on the wiper, and looked towards the sea. The place where there was moonlight was already covered by dark clouds.
I shook my head first, and then smiled bitterly. This sudden change probably hinted to me that during the year and a half in Qingdao, it looked sunny, but in fact it was gloomy and dull. I was really not very happy.
……
The car's headlights came on as the engine vibrated. I put one hand in gear, stepped on the clutch with one foot, and quickly turned the car around.
I didn't take another look, let alone linger, and quickly drove the car towards the overgrown intersection...
When I was about to get on the elevated track, the cell phone in the storage compartment rang again. I was really curious as to who else would call me when I was about to leave.
I slowed down the car and took out my phone from the storage compartment. But it was not the group of friends I met in the bar. The call was from Ba Xiaoguang.
Ba Xiaoguang is my workmate. We once did the decoration work of a villa together. He was a master carpenter and I worked behind him as a handyman. We worked together for more than four months. Later, this villa After the project was completed, he went to a new construction site, and I hung out in the bar, and we had little contact with him after that.
In my memory, the last time we met was half a year ago. That time, I called him to the bar and he was supposed to treat me, but in the end he took advantage of me to go to the bathroom and paid the bill himself...
It was nothing, but before he left, he said something to me, which made me never contact him again: He said that he was just a migrant worker, and he and I were not the same kind of people. Neither is a friend. If this happens again in the future, don’t call him that again...
At that time, I was very embarrassed and didn’t know how to reply for a long time. At this time, he told me with a smile: His wife was pregnant for three months. He was busy supporting his family and didn’t bother to make friends so that I could have some time with him. When you have free time, just go to his place and sit...
I was a little confused, but thinking about it afterwards: I felt that he still regarded me as a friend, but he was limited by his vision and knowledge and could not express himself so completely, so some words he said could easily offend others, but I didn't take it seriously, but I didn't contact him again, let alone go to his place... because we were really not the same kind of people, and I didn't want to cause him any trouble... I still remember that day at the bar, he didn't say much the whole night. In short, even though we were having fun, he paid the bill in the end... Isn't this just causing trouble for him?
At this moment, he took the initiative to call me, and I couldn't help but be a little surprised; I was even thinking: Could it be that he had moved and wanted to invite me to his house for a drink?I remember that when we were working together, he always told me that when he got rich in the future, he would buy a house in Qingdao so that his wife and children could have a place to live without having to follow him around. You must have a drink with me to celebrate...
I muttered: It’s not that easy to buy a house in Qingdao, right?
With such doubts, I answered his call: "Hello, Xiaoguang..."
I don't know what happened, but he didn't speak, and the atmosphere suddenly became a bit depressing.
"Xiaoguang, is the signal over there not good? Can you hear me?"
Still silent, but I could hear his heavy breathing.
I drove the car to the side of the road and turned off the engine; finally, he said: "Brother... can you lend me 6000 yuan?"
"Did something happen to you?"
Ba Xiaoguang's voice was trembling: "My wife gave birth prematurely and is now in the hospital, waiting for a caesarean section... The doctor asked me to pay 6000 yuan for the surgery... I can't get a penny out now... If you have any , can you lend it to me first?"
If I was only surprised by Ba Xiaoguang's call at first, I am shocked now... I can't imagine an adult who has been given the mission of carrying on the family lineage, but when this moment is coming, he loses his life because he can't raise the surgery fee. He was so confused and beating his chest in the hospital... I can't imagine what a hard-working man has gone through that would make him unable to even pay 6000 yuan for surgery at this urgent moment... I must I need to go to the hospital to see him.
"Okay, I'll transfer the money to you...you pay the surgery fee first."
Without waiting for Ba Xiaoguang to say thank you, I hung up the phone and transferred 6000 yuan to him using WeChat. After he sent over the location of the hospital, I turned around and drove toward the city again. …
Half an hour later, I arrived at the hospital and headed straight to the fifth floor... I saw Ba Xiaoguang in the corridor of the hospital. At this moment, he was leaning against the wall, eyes closed tightly, looking haggard.
It wasn't until I called his name that he opened his eyes.I looked around and asked him, "Are you alone?"
"Ah."
"Have they arranged surgery for their siblings?"
"Ah."
I put my hand on his shoulder to express comfort and encouragement: "That's good...how long will the surgery take?"
Ba Xiaoguang shook his head blankly, not sure whether he was numb or frightened.I stopped a passing nurse and asked, only to find out that it would take four to five hours, and only four and ten minutes had passed... This means that I have to wait here with Ba Xiaoguang for at least three hours. Enough for us to have a good chat.
……
I went to the vending machine and bought two bottles of mineral water. I handed one of the bottles to Ba Xiaoguang, signaling him to drink some water to relieve his nervousness.He is indeed too nervous. In this state, there is no way to have a good conversation.
Ba Xiaoguang subconsciously took it from my hand, but didn't drink it. I told him it was mineral water, and he realized it. Then he unscrewed the cap of the bottle and drank half the bottle with a "gudong, gudong" sound. After drinking it, he started to drink heavily again. Panting...
After he calmed down a little, I asked: "Xiaoguang, how long has it been since we last met?"
"Half a year."
"Half a year is neither short nor long. How can you...?"
Ba Xiaoguang finally looked at me. For the first time, I saw tears in his eyes. In my mind, he has never been a person who likes to show his emotions in front of others. We have worked together for more than four months. Sometimes, When his employer says unpleasant things, he always laughs it off. Sometimes I want to help him out, but he always advises me to endure it, saying that suffering a loss is a blessing... But at this moment, he can't bear it anymore. , he must have encountered something extremely difficult.
"Brother... I really had no other options, so I asked you to borrow money."
"This is obvious. You should know in your heart that I have always regarded you as a friend... tell me what happened. You are not a lazy person. How come you are at this time? You can't even pay 6000 yuan." Can’t even get the money out?”
The corner of Ba Xiaoguang's mouth was trembling, and suddenly he couldn't hold it anymore. He cried bitterly and said to me: "I can't understand it. I wish I could die of exhaustion on the construction site every day. I get up at six in the morning to work and go to work at ten in the evening." I just went back...how did it become like this?...Brother, during these three years in Qingdao, I really saved money. After we finished the villa work, I still have a deposit of 15 on my card... ...As long as I work harder, I can save 20 by the Chinese New Year no matter what. I have agreed with my wife that I will buy a car first and then drive the car back with my children during the Chinese New Year. The elderly on both sides will be able to feel proud and proud. I felt that I had hope for the future... However, last month, my dad was diagnosed with sepsis... I gave all the 15 to my family, and borrowed it from all my relatives and friends who could borrow money... In the end, the money It’s still not enough…I’m in a dilemma now, I really don’t know how to survive…”
I probably have been degenerate for too long and don’t understand the sufferings of the world. Suddenly, a person who was tortured by fate appeared next to me. While I felt awake, I was also a little suffocated. It took me a long time before I became silent. He said to him: "I can't enlighten you on this matter... I can only say that as a man, you should grit your teeth and persevere..."
"I can't bite anymore, I really can't bite anymore..."
Ba Xiaoguang sat down and I held his arm, and he kept repeating this sentence, his voice getting smaller and smaller, but more and more tears flowed, and finally he burst into tears again...
There is no such thing as empathy in this world, so those who were disturbed by his cries all cast very unfriendly eyes towards him.
I sighed softly and took out another 4000 yuan in cash from my pocket. This cash was prepared in case there was an extreme situation on the road and I couldn't use my mobile phone to pay...
"Xiaoguang, let's not think too far ahead. Let's start with the things at hand first... The child is born, and both adults and children need to take care of themselves. Take these 4000 yuan. The child is the most important thing. As long as the child is healthy, hope will be there." …”
With that said, I stuffed the 4000 yuan into his pocket.Although roses given to others leave a lingering fragrance in their hands, I still lost my mind in Ba Xiaoguang’s cry. I knew: I am afraid I really won’t be able to leave Qingdao this time; because my pocket is already empty!
(End of this chapter)
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