Qingfeng Xu Xu

Xu Qingjiu opens her eyes every morning, just looking forward to sunset and dark soon. Not eating or drinking has long been a normal thing for Xu Qingjiu. Xu Qingjiu also doesn't feel hungry at all. However, sometimes he will feel some discomfort in his stomach, but it will pass after a while of patience. After Xu Huaisen left just now, Xu Qingjiu stood in the room for a while, lay down for a while, then got up again, and wandered around the room alone. Apart from looking at Xu Mulin lying in the back mountain, Xu Qingjiu didn't know what else she could do. What. Over the years, Xu Qingjiu has tried all possible ways to wake up Xu Mulin, and he has tried them more than once. But now, it seems that Xu Qingjiu can do nothing but wait, and there is nothing he can do. No matter what you do, it will be useless in the end.

Xu Qingjiu sat back on the bed, picked up a wooden box next to the pillow, touched every position carefully, and then opened it carefully. Inside the wooden box is a white jade hairpin with red thread wrapped in the middle. There is a money bag made of bamboo-green linen next to it, and the knot is also a strip of bamboo-green fine cloth. It looks like the leftovers from cutting clothes. Xu Qingjiu picked up the white jade hairpin and rubbed it over and over in his hand. Suddenly, the hairpin split into two parts where the red thread was wrapped around it. Xu Qingjiu was rubbing the top, and the lower half suddenly slipped from his hand. Next, Xu Qingjiu reached out to catch it but failed. The half of the hairpin knocked on the edge of the wooden box and fell straight to the ground, breaking into two pieces. Xu Qingjiu looked at the hairpin on the ground and stood there in a daze while continuing to pick up the half of the hairpin. Not knowing how long time had stood still, Xu Qingjiu slowly slid off the bed and sat on her knees on the ground. Xu Qingjiu carefully picked up the hairpin piece by piece and worked hard to piece it together. Then he took the other half of the hairpin and wrapped the red thread around the two fractures. After trying many times, the bottom The hairpin still couldn't be fixed. Unavoidably, Xu Qingjiu became a little anxious, but he continued to wrap his hand around the red thread. Finally, the broken hairpin was fixed.

Xu Qingjiu carefully put the hairpin into the wooden box, but only the top of the hairpin was unwrapped, and it was almost impossible to see what was wrapped under the red line. Xu Qingjiu carefully placed the wooden box, and suddenly the smell of blood spread in his mouth. Xu Qingjiu walked to the table and picked up the kettle to drink water. He was choked by a violent cough. He coughed and coughed. Xu Qingjiu knelt down on the ground and spit out another mouthful of blood. His eyes were blurred due to the violent cough. There was a layer of moisture on it, and the corners of his eyes became redder. Xu Qingjiu looked at the mottled bright red on the ground and suddenly laughed. While smiling, he said to himself:"Really, I should give you a silver hairpin. The silver hairpin should not be broken. But, senior brother It is most suitable to wear a jade hairpin, and it needs a white jade hairpin to set it off the best. But why is it so easy to break? What a pity, what a pity...Forget it, the peach wood hairpin that senior brother wears is also very beautiful, but I still prefer the white jade hairpin. Forget it, go ask your senior brother, go ask your senior brother..."Xu Qingjiu's voice became more rapid and blurry, as if he was suffering from hysteria. Xu Qingjiu got up from the ground, and the blurred vision made Xu Qingjiu unable to see clearly what was in front of him. Xu Qingjiu stumbled out of the door, and hurriedly ran to the back mountain cold pool. A gust of wind blew from behind Xu Qingjiu. Xu Qingjiu suddenly seemed to sense something, stopped and turned around, with a smile in his eyes. The complex emotions in his eyes were blurred by the moisture, but it could still be seen that a lot of pain was mixed in the moisture.

A wine jar covered with red cloth was placed next to the door. The smell of the wine penetrated through the red cloth and penetrated into Xu Qingjiu's nose with the breeze. Combined with the red cloth, it was really pungent and piercing. The moisture in Xu Qingjiu's eyes became thicker.

Xu Huaisen, who had not walked far after putting down the wine jar, suddenly heard a huge noise coming from the direction of Xu Qingjiu's bedroom, and turned back in three steps and two steps at a time.

I only saw Xu Qingjiu standing in the yard, looking into the house with sinister eyes. The blood stains that were originally just on the corners of Xu Qingjiu's lips were now all over his chin. Xu Huaisen waved his sword in his hand without a trace of hesitation. Protecting Xu Qingjiu behind him, he stared at the broken door with a posture of facing the enemy. However, seeing that there were no signs of fighting in the room, Xu Huaisen was confused for a while.

Xu Qingjiu behind him was interrupted from his thoughts by Xu Huaisen who hurriedly arrived. Seeing the disciple's posture in front of him, Xu Qingjiu smiled bitterly, then pulled his sleeves and wiped his face a few times, then raised his hand and slowly pressed down Xu Huaisen's Hengjian hand.

Xu Huaisen was stunned for a moment, then turned sideways to support Xu Qingjiu, but the sword was still pointing straight forward. Seeing Xu Huaisen's posture, Xu Qingjiu had no choice but to raise her hand again to press down Xu Huaisen's sword-raising hand. He let out a long breath and then slowly said:"I'm fine." Seeing Xu Huaisen's sad face, Xu Qingjiu Qingjiu had no choice but to pause his thoughts and continued with a joking look:"I'm fine. The person who can seriously injure your master to the extent that he needs you as his disciple to protect him hasn't been born yet. I'm just a temporary...His breath was unstable for a moment, and he just vomited two mouthfuls of blood."

Looking at Xu Qingjiu pretending to be fine and joking, saying such words that were immediately obvious to be nonsense, Xu Huaisen could not imagine how heavy the pain he was trying to hide. But in order to prevent Xu Qingjiu from getting even more serious Anxious, Xu Huaisen had no choice but to cooperate and make a slightly embarrassed look, bowed his hands and said,"Master, forgive me, it was Huaisen who was reckless."

Xu Qingjiu looked at Xu Huaisen's respectful look that had not changed in ten years, and suddenly felt funny. When he first met Xu Huaisen, Xu Huaisen had such a serious look, but Xu Huaisen was only fourteen or fifteen years old at the time, but he seemed so serious It is already the behavior of a deputy adult. In the final analysis, it is because of the many sufferings that he has to become such a child. Xu Qingjiu is still hesitating whether to take Xu Huaisen back to Tianzong, so that Xu Huaisen can be protected A place to take shelter from wind and rain, to eat, run, and wear warmth. But before Xu Qingjiu could figure it out, Xu Huaisen knelt down and kowtowed. Xu Qingjiu was so frightened that Xu Qingjiu hurriedly took a few steps back before he realized what he was doing and helped Xu Huaisen up.

"Are you willing to go back to Tianzong with me?"

"What is Tianzong?"

"...Tianzong...Tianzong is where I grew up, and it should be able to protect you from the wind and rain."

"OK, I do. only..."

Xu Huaisen agreed simply, but he had concerns. Xu Qingjiu couldn't help but wonder,"Just what?"

"But will it cause you any trouble if you take me back?"

Actually, Xu Qingjiu had selfish motives for taking Xu Huaisen back to Tianzong. He said he wanted to bring Xu Huaisen back to Tianzong. In fact, Xu Qingjiu mainly wanted to keep Xu Huaisen in Shanzongtang. Xu Qingjiu had just succeeded Tianzong with the help of outsiders. Although he was in the position of the door, there was no one who was really close and trustworthy around him. Those new sects tried their best to put people around Xu Qingjiu, but Xu Qingjiu could not let Wu Jinghua and the others always be by his side. Thinking of this , Xu Qingjiu felt bitter in her heart,"No. On the contrary, maybe you can help me a lot"

"good."This time Xu Huaisen's answer was straightforward enough.

"No other questions?"

"Should there be any questions?"

"For example, in what capacity should you stay in Tianzong, stay in Shanzongtang, and stay in front of me?"

"How about I be your junior brother?"

"My junior brother can stay in Tianzong, but he cannot stay in Shanzongtang...Unless you are my apprentice"

"apprentice? Xu Huaisen finally showed some embarrassment on his face,"Although you look haggard and vicissitudes of life, you are not that much older than me. You are old enough to be my master.""

Although Xu Qingjiu didn't want to challenge Tianzong's rules just after he took over, it wouldn't necessarily be too difficult if he really wanted to do that, so it didn't matter if he brought a junior disciple into Shanzong Hall, but Xu Qingjiu was extremely repulsive at that time. As Xu Enze's disciple, when Xu Huaisen mentioned his junior disciple, Xu Qingjiu also tried his best to deny it. He just wanted to pretend that he had never had a master. Although Xu Qingjiu took over the Tianzong in this capacity, there seemed to be no conflict..

But what Xu Huaisen said is very reasonable. Xu Qingjiu is six or seven years older than Xu Huaisen. It is really far-fetched to say that he is a master and disciple. Xu Qingjiu needs trustworthy people, but he does not necessarily have to keep Shan Zongtang. Although Xu Qingjiu She was worried that Xu Huaisen would change his temperament after staying with others for a long time, but Xu Qingjiu felt that if that happened, then he would just think that he had seen the wrong person today.

"Too. Then go back to Tianzong first. I will arrange for you to stay in another hall first...."

"Don’t you want me to be in Shan Zongtang?"Xu Huaisen actually had some dissatisfaction on his face, which made Xu Qingjiu feel at a loss for a moment.

"...Junior brother can't..."

"Okay, then become a disciple."As he spoke, Xu Huaisen knelt down again. Xu Qingjiu still didn't have time to hold him back. Xu Huaisen had already started to kowtow,"Disciple...."Xu Huaisen raised his head and looked at Xu Qingjiu,"Master, please give me a name."

"Just change your last name to Xu Nian"

"No, I don’t want to be Yu Nian anymore, I want a new identity."

Hearing this, Xu Qingjiu suddenly realized that he saw some shadows of himself in Xu Huaisen.

"Master, is there anyone you care about? People like to put similar meanings in their names."Xu Huaisen saw Xu Qingjiu's hesitation, thinking that Xu Qingjiu didn't know how to come up with a new name, so he gave a reminder

"...good. Huaisen, Xu Huaisen, how are you?"

"yes. Disciple Xu Huaisen pays homage to his master."

Now that I think about it, it has been ten years. But ten years do not seem to have many traces on Xu Huaisen. Xu Huaisen seems to be the same big boy ten years ago. Now he has just grown up, and his temperament has not changed at all. , thinking of this, a sentence suddenly flashed in Xu Qingjiu's mind: Just be yourself. Xu Mulin said it to himself, and he also said it to Xu Huaisen.

Seeing Xu Qingjiu standing aside, lowered in thought, Xu Huaisen accepted it Sword, standing aside respectfully. Xu Huaisen has been under Xu Qingjiu's family for ten years. Over the years, Xu Huaisen has heard a few things about the past. After getting along with each other for these years, he naturally understands Xu Qingjiu's thoughts and worries. Although Sometimes seeing Xu Qingjiu in pain, Xu Huaisen wanted to express his condolences, hoping to give Xu Qingjiu some comfort. But in the end, Xu Qingjiu was just a person who, even though he was in great pain, neither bothered to pretend nor wanted to be compared to others. He had an expression of great pain and hatred, and he didn't want to hear other people's words of comfort. For Xu Qingjiu, it seemed that only a little more pain could support him to continue to live. Xu Huaisen had already tried rashly and failed once , at this moment, he didn’t dare to speak easily anymore, so he could only stand aside silently, waiting for Xu Qingjiu to slowly calm down.

"Wyson."After a while, Xu Qingjiu slowly spoke.

"I'm here, Master, how are you? I'll ask the disciples from Shennong Hall to come and take a look at you."

"No, I'll just do my exercises and adjust my breath later."

"...Okay, then Huaison should accompany Master. Xu

Qingjiu said with a smile:"What are you doing with me? It's so late, don't you need to rest?""

"I..."

"Huisen, I have something to ask you."

"Master, no matter what you ask, Huisen will do his best."

Looking at Xu Huaisen's serious look, Xu Qingjiu couldn't help but shook his head and said with a smile:"I'm a little tired. From today on, Tianzong will be handed over to you. You will do it in the past two years. Very good, better than me."With that said, Xu Qingjiu took off the jade medal from his waist and put it into Xu Huaisen's hand.

Xu Huaisen listened to Xu Qingjiu's words and looked at Xu Qingjiu's movements. He didn't know what to say at all. He just frowned and shed tears.

When Xu Qingjiu looked up and saw Xu Huaisen's expression, he was also stunned for a moment,"Although the position of head of the Tianzong is not a good job, it is not a hard job, Huaisen, you can't be like this."As he said that, Xu Qingjiu smiled awkwardly and scratched his head.

"master..."

Seeing the worried look on Xu Huaisen's face, Xu Qingjiu thought about it and suddenly realized why Xu Huaisen was so extreme. Xu Qingjiu interrupted Xu Huaisen's words and continued:"I'm really tired and don't want to take on this errand anymore. Although you have been handling the affairs for the past two years, I haven't done anything, but I still have this status. , it’s also a burden after all, I just...I just wanted to get away from it and have a good rest, I had no other plans."What Xu Qingjiu said is true. Although Xu Qingjiu has been torturing or punishing herself in a way that excessively consumes herself, Xu Qingjiu knows in her heart that there are still many people who are thinking about her, so Even if it comes to an end, Xu Qingjiu will not choose a too direct and straightforward way. As for torturing herself, Xu Qingjiu just does not want to let herself live too freely. Xu Qingjiu feels that such a day should not happen. On himself.

After listening to Xu Qingjiu's words, Xu Huaison felt that his reaction just now was a bit too much. He scratched his head and lowered his head in embarrassment and said:"Disciple is willing to share the burden for master. But master, are you leaving Tianzong?"After saying that, he looked up at Xu Qingjiu, hoping to get Xu Qingjiu's denial.

Xu Qingjiu seemed to think about it carefully. Finally, he turned around and walked towards the back mountain, saying as he walked:"Let me think about it. After walking a few steps, he turned back to Xu Huaisen and said,"Huaisen, bring a jar of wine for Master.""

"Yes, Master."As he said that, Xu Huaisen trotted to Xu Qingjiu with a jar of wine in his arms.

"Okay, go back and rest quickly, I'll go to the back mountain for a while."Xu Qingjiu took the wine and turned around and walked away.

"Yes, Master, walk slowly."

Xu Qingjiu held the wine jar and walked on the way to the back mountain. Now Xu Qingjiu was the only one left. Xu Qingjiu's heart suddenly became heavy again. Many past memories came back one after another, like Like a revolving lantern, it was replaying in Xu Qingjiu's mind.

Thirteen years have passed, except for the first two or three years, because Xu Mulin needed to exercise and recuperate every day. Although Xu Qingjiu was running around, Xu Qingjiu still kept Xu Mulin's mind at all times. Lin Dai was with him, so they saw each other every day. After returning to Tianzong and taking over as the head, although the frequency of exercise and recuperation no longer needed to be as frequent as once a day, Xu Qingjiu still went to Hantan to see him every day. Xu Mulin, chat with Xu Mulin about interesting things that happened during that time; or talk about the past; or say nothing, just keep calling Xu Mulin, but never get any response. Sometimes, Xu Qingjiu will be like today Then he went there with a bottle of wine, got drunk, and slept there all night. In another situation, Xu Qingjiu had made up his mind from the moment he opened his eyes in the morning, thinking that he would not go to the back mountain that day no matter what. The result of not going to see Xu Mulin is that he never really does it. And every time he goes, Xu Qingjiu hopes that as soon as he enters Hantan, he can see Xu Mulin wake up and sit there, Looking at herself and walking towards her like before, even if Xu Mulin doesn't want to talk to herself, it's good. Unfortunately, the result every time disappoints Xu Qingjiu.

Xu Qingjiu has also tried to persuade herself. Compared with many For people who are separated by Yin and Yang or who cannot see each other again in this life, they are actually very lucky. But maybe Xu Qingjiu is a little greedy. Because of greed, Xu Qingjiu doesn’t want his day-to-day waiting to be like a joke. He doesn’t want I can only watch Xu Mulin lying there as if he is dead. I don't want to open my eyes every day and only"wait" can be done, unable to do anything, everything is so highlighted.

And sometimes , Xu Qingjiu will feel cruel again in her heart, complaining about why Xu Mulin likes herself. If Xu Qingjiu only likes Xu Mulin unilaterally, then Xu Qingjiu does not have to be like this in this endless torture day after day. Xu Qingjiu could be freed from the pain, and should have repaid Xu Mulin for all the things he had done for him. But the reality was always not what Xu Qingjiu wished for.