I will not die!

She was so frightened that she almost cried out, and hurried forward to check on me, shaking my body, listening to my heartbeat, and when she heard the regular beating of my heart, she finally breathed a sigh of relief, and tears immediately burst out of her eyes.

"You can sleep well, what are you doing with your eyes open, it scares me to death......

".

I turned to look at her and said slowly, "I'm sorry. "

As if hearing the exhaustion in the words, she asked me again what was wrong, if I was not feeling well there, and I just replied that I felt very tired, so tired that it was difficult to even turn over.

She suddenly hugged me and said, "If you're tired, it's good to take more rest, rest more......

".

"Hmm. "

Alley hugged me for a long time, and then I found out that she had fallen asleep with me in her arms, although I was very tired, but I still got up and took off her shoes and socks, covered the quilt, just a few simple actions, more tired than I usually work overtime all night. Eventually, I put her hand back in the way she had been when she had held me.

......

"Ah...... Mouth. "Alley fed me the sesame paste she had made herself, and although she had no talent for cooking, she was always successful after a few more attempts.

"Ah......h

"Haha, I've always wanted to try feeding people like this. "

"I can eat my own. I swallowed the mush.

"You're not feeling well right now, and it's okay to enjoy being taken care of. "

“......"

"Oh, don't be sad, it's not your fault that you're sick, everyone can get sick. I also felt very tired for a while, and I only thought about sleeping all day long, and I didn't bother to move to eat, but then I watched the animation like crazy, and I was better by watching it. My trick may not work for you, but you'll get better soon. "

Not long ago, at the suggestion of Alley, I asked the company for annual leave and sick leave to rest at home, and I still have a lot of insomnia these days, but because I don't have to work, I can stay up all night to my heart's content, and it's nothing. I've also listened to Alley's animations a lot these days (although I can't watch them), eaten a lot of sweets (although I can't taste them), and of course, I've taken a lot of medicine, and I'm getting a lot better. Although I still feel tired from time to time, I don't want to move at all when I lie down, and I keep thinking about this and that mess in my mind as soon as I close my eyes, but as long as I want to, normal movement is still no problem, and even work can be done normally, but it will be a little annoying and tired.

"Do you want to go out for a walk, the doctor said that there are many benefits to going out for a walk, of course, if you want to, if you don't want to, don't force it. "Alley's advice wasn't on a whim, all of her advice was asked to me after the AI doctor had been asked and received an affirmative answer.

"Good. "I'm tired, but it's not that I can't move, and there's no reason to say no (although I never seem to have said anything to her).

"Okay, then I'll go and get ready!" she ran to clean up in a panic, and jumped down the tree, but she immediately remembered something and turned back, "Do you have a place you want to go, like a few attractions we have been to before, but some places are more crowded, do you want a place with fewer people?" "

"Either way. "

"Then it's a place with fewer people, okay?"

"Hmm. "

"Okay, let's go this Sunday, that's it?".

"Hmm. "

In the days that followed, it was as if we were back in the first days of our relationship, and she always took me everywhere to experience the beauty and fun of this world (although we both felt more tired). Alley used to rarely ask my opinion on what to do, and always did whatever came to mind, because it was a blank question when she asked, and I would agree anyway, but now, she almost does everything she asks the AI first and then asks me, and treats me like she is facing a glass object glued together. There was a tiredness on her face that even I could tell.

But I haven't changed anything, I'm just a little tired, I'm still me, you don't need to change anything for me, you don't need to deprive me of your freedom, you just continue to be yourself as you used to, don't care about ......me at all

Before I could tell what I was thinking and discussing, Alley seemed to be the first to notice it, and said coldly: "Because it's Guangyuan, I can't let it go." "

"Huh?".

"Ah, I accidentally said what I was thinking. She smiled sheepishly, "Because you usually indulge me, I can't continue to ignore your thoughts and feelings when you're sick." "

"You can rely on me a little more, and I'll be glad if you give me more advice. "She hugged me from behind, her arms hanging over my shoulders.

“...... I don't have a problem with it (because you've done the best I can think of). "

"Oh, yes, don't regret it, yes, you never regret ......."

As she spoke, her arms slid down to my waist and ...... She tickled me suddenly.

"Huh?".

"What are you doing here?".

"Why don't you laugh?".

"Me, should I laugh?".

I asked Yakumo if there was any way to make you happy quickly, and Yakumo said, just scratch your squeaky nest. "

The one who doesn't give up!

"It's useless for you now. "

"Never used it. "

"Ah, did he lie to me. "

"It should be. "

"Well, I'm sorry, then you can scratch it back. As she spoke, she spread her arms out, revealing her waist and abdomen.

"No need. "

She put my hand on her waist and said shyly, "Actually, I also want to know if this trick will work for ......

you."

“......"

I moved my fingers and scratched her ribs twice.

"Hahaha...... Stop!".

I immediately stopped.

"Okay, I see. No need to try again......" she gasped.

"Good. "

As I relaxed, she suddenly poked me twice more on my side ribs, and my body trembled, only to feel a swarm of ants crawling up my scalp along my waist.

"It's really useless...... How?".

"I don't know ......

".

During the days I spent playing with Alley, my emotions were like clouds in the wind, and only tiredness was always with me, and my body deteriorated.

However, all this was hidden by me in the illusion of harmony.

I didn't mean to hide it, but I couldn't help but respond to Alley's efforts, as if it was the only way I could become a little more like a person than a sick reservoir dog.

As the illusion became more and more real, the walls were built higher and higher, and in my heart, there seemed to be something else, less and less.

......

"How about we go hiking next week, of course, not climbing the kind that is very tiring, and by the way buy some food and have a picnic outside. What do you think?" Alley suggested.

"It's up to you to decide. "

"I think it's nice to have a mountain not far from our state, or somewhere else, and you can see what the place we've lived in for so long looks like. "

"Good. "I didn't think twice about it at all. At the end of the day, I wasn't interested in any of the activities, and I accepted them only because there was no reason to say no. After all, even if I don't accept it, I'll just have nothing to do.

Time flies, and in a blink of an eye, it is time to agree to climb the mountain.

Because of the good repair of the road, the mountain that Alley chose is indeed not difficult to fear, even kindergarten children should be able to easily deal with it, but this is all for normal people, and for me now, climbing this mountain should not be much different from a person who has never exercised and is suddenly pulled to run a marathon.

It seems that I did make a wrong decision, no, I underestimated the power of nature, and overestimated my own ability. It wasn't my decision that caused this mistake, it was my arrogance.

But what's the use of knowing what the mistake is, the mistake can't be changed, it can only be made up, and right now, there is only one way to make up for it, relying on Alley. But she's already carried most of our food and props, so what more do I have to rely on her?

"You can rely on me a little more, and I'll be glad if you give me more advice. What she had said suddenly rang in my ears, and I subconsciously stopped.

Maybe ......

"Are you tired?" she asked, turning her head when she saw me stop.

"Uh-huh......

".

"There's a rest area not far ahead, just hold on a little longer, let's go where to rest. "

I wanted to answer yes, but as soon as my foot movement stopped, I couldn't take a step.

"I can't walk anymore......" I said with my head bowed and reluctantly.

She seemed a little shocked, because if it was me before, I would have answered without saying a word.

"Then let's rest here. "

She smiled and sat down on the spot, and I sat down with her, and she took water and two chocolates from her backpack, and we sat down on the dirty floor, eating in the breeze and sweat. Perhaps because of the local light rain today, there were very few people who came to climb the mountain, at least so far I have only seen the two of us on this mountain, thanks to which our actions have not caused trouble to others.

After finally regaining some strength, we climbed to the top of the mountain in one go, and the whole journey took nearly three hours, of course, if I didn't lag behind, and Alley climbed alone, it is estimated that it would not have been an hour.

Although the climb is difficult, when I reach the top of the mountain, I suddenly feel that everything seems to be a little familiar, and it is true that I must be the first time to come to this mountain, but I have the illusion that I have already climbed it once.

"Oh...... If you look at it from here, it doesn't seem like the city we are in is very big. "In the small pavilion at the top of the mountain, we looked into the distance and enjoyed the scenery that belonged to us for the time being.

"Ah, it's so comfortable to blow in the wind. Alley looked back at me, "Guangyuan, do you feel the urge to roar?"

I stepped over to her and felt the breeze on my cheeks, a strange feeling that I couldn't explain.

Comfortable?

Wrong.

Tranquility?

Wrong.

Melancholy?

Wrong.

Relief?

It seems like ...... right

Liberation from what?

City?

Wrong.

Crowd?

Wrong.

Noise?

Wrong.

It's me!

It's my own ......

I'm so tired that I feel like my body can fall apart at any moment, and if I take a little breeze, some rain, or if I take one more step forward, even if there is no external force, I will tear myself apart.

Then, there is complete liberation.

For some reason, the tears suddenly stopped.

Looking at the gloomy sky like a stinking ditch, I had a very bizarre idea in my heart, I wanted to fly up, to embrace that sky, and then fall with it, and fall to pieces.

Alley noticed my anomaly and wiped the corners of my eyes while anxiously asking me what was wrong, and all my fantasies were thrown out of the sky at the sight of her face. But at the same time, a different idea took over my brain.

If only I had come alone.

But how is this possible, I can't go out for such a boring activity as climbing a mountain, I can't come to such a remote place alone, I can't climb this mountain alone, it's not difficult to climb alone. Even though these things are incredibly simple, I can't do them on my own.

So I'm destined to have no way to get rid of it.

Never.

"Guangyuan, Guangyuan, what's wrong with you, don't scare me!" Alley shook my body vigorously, trying to keep me awake, but I was actually sober, just unable to respond.

"I'm fine. Finally, I struggled to spit out a word.

"Are you all right? If you don't speak, I'll think you're sitting still. What the hell is going on?".

"I was suddenly a little scared. "

"Scared, what are you afraid of, can you tell me?".

"I don't know ......

".

“...... It's okay. Alley didn't continue to ask, but looked me in the eye and said to me gently, "I used to have a lot of things to be afraid of, but now with you by my side, I'm not afraid of anything." "

"Really. She hugged me and said, "I may not be that brave, but I will always be there for you, so there is nothing to be afraid of." "

"Uh-huh......

".

Underneath that smile, I couldn't answer anything else. Looking at her smile, something similar suddenly came to my mind, but I couldn't remember what it was.

"Take a little more rest, and we'll go down the mountain. "

"Good. "

She took out the bread and milk she had bought early in her backpack, which I usually like to eat, but now I can't eat them.

"If you're not hungry, take it home and eat it. "

"Hmm. "

After packing up the garbage and taking one last look at the scenery from the top of the mountain, we went back down the same route. On the way down the mountain, it stands to reason that going down the mountain should be much easier than going up, and I also rested for a long time at the top of the mountain just now, but for some reason, my steps became heavier and heavier, as if a mountain was tied to my feet. Every step I take, it's not so much moving forward as tearing at my own body.

However, no matter how slowly I walked, Alley was always by my side, never taking another step.

I'm starting to get scared again.

But what am I afraid of?

Alley?

I can't be afraid.

Lonely?

I can't be afraid.

The future?

Why am I afraid?

Suddenly, the distant sky drew my gaze, it was the Tyndall effect of sunlight piercing the clouds, it was so beautiful that it was like a blade piercing the chest of the world, if this knife had a wielder, it must have been a god.

Suddenly, all the fear in my heart vanished, and in its place was an endless yearning.

If only I could be pierced through the chest by that beautiful and flawless blade.

Then there must be nothing in this world that can restrain me anymore.

Because, that's the hand of a great god.

Suddenly, I felt a lightness under my feet, as if my body was really floating, not only that, but the world was spinning upside down in front of my eyes, and my brain was empty, and the golden blade was far away in the sky, but it was as close as my eyes, as long as I reached out and touched, I could grasp it tightly. Just when I felt like I was about to grasp the corner of the sky and take it into my arms, darkness instantly eroded my world.

The sky and the earth vanished, and I fell from the sky into the infinite darkness.

I remembered, under the pressure of the deathly silence and the immobility of my body, I suddenly remembered what the image that had come to my mind before. It was an old animated short film that I had seen, with only one line in the whole film, and the rest of the pictures were all with white subtitles on a black background, and it was a very impressive short film called ......