Fantasy world

I took the risk and went to Zhang Xiaolian's house for the first time, although I was severely reprimanded and warned by Zhang Xiaolian. But after all, he got the opportunity and acquiescence to have a secret tryst with Zhang Xiaolian. Although Michelle never left the two of us at Zhang Xiaolian's house, there were always times when she didn't pay much attention. As long as Zhang Xiaolian and I took the opportunity to make eye contact, we would feel like a mirror to each other.

After I came back from Zhang Xiaolian's house, I went to the countryside where we often met on time every day to wait. One day, two days, three days... Zhang Xiaolian still didn't show up. But I firmly believe that Zhang Xiaolian will come one day.

This is not a delusion or a miracle, this is a tacit understanding.

When she finally agreed to come to see me, the clouds cleared up between us, and all the haze that had been shrouding our hearts disappeared in an instant, leaving only happiness and passion. And every time this time, she seemed to suddenly return to the innocence and liveliness that was younger than me. Ever since we had close contact, Zhang Xiaolian has been two people in front of me. In broad daylight, she is a cadre and the eldest sister; when the countryside is covered with darkness and indulgence, she is deceived, childish and simple, with a soulful soul. A little country girl who is upside down and unable to extricate herself.

Reunion after a long absence is a volcanic eruption that almost all men and women in the world cannot resist. This is the crazy will to die resolutely even with the knife on the neck.

After bursts of stormy madness that didn’t require any words. Zhang Xiaolian once again became as docile and sweet as a kitten. She completely curled herself up in my arms, and from time to time stretched out her fingertips to draw irregular patterns on my chest muscles.

"After being separated for such a long time, you deliberately avoided me when I came back."After I was satisfied, I still complained like this. She looked at me fiercely:"I just want to punish you on purpose. Who asked you to harm me to the point where I am now a human being and a ghost? I am holding fire in my heart and holding my breath. Can't I just seek revenge from you?"

"Then you can’t—give up on yourself!"

"Why did I give up on myself? I am not seeking death and looking down on myself. If I don't quickly settle myself down like this, I will be giving up on myself and seeking a short-circuit!"

"But I already said I love you and I want to marry you"

"Stop it! Just talk nonsense! If you want to go crazy, I will only die more miserably, and you will have to be involved, and our whole family will be involved. Even Xueer and uncle and aunt will be affected. Do you think I will be as stupid as you?"

"But——"

"What else is okay? This is destiny, and God's will cannot be violated. Sister and you were destined from the beginning to be the right couple for the rest of our lives. My sister is willing to accompany you like this, giving her heart and body completely to you. How is this any different from marrying you? Why do you have to ruin your reputation just for that status? Sister and you are short of a child at most, so you don’t have to worry about that. After sister finds someone to marry her off, she will naturally find a way to leave a lasting impression on this fate between the two of us."

"But when I think about my sister marrying another man and spending the rest of her life together, I feel angry and jealous. I feel sour in my heart and feel very uncomfortable."

"OK OK! Nothing is perfect in this world. You have coaxed me into being like this. The way I am now is the worst kind of woman that country people scold. If you are not satisfied, then I am really heartbroken."

"How can I be dissatisfied? I feel that I owe my sister so much. My sister is so kind to me, but I can't do anything for her. I feel so bitter and annoyed"

"Then you should be nicer to Xue'er and make up for all the guilt you feel towards your sister on Xue'er."

"How is that the same? No matter how nice I am to Xue'er, it's all right. No matter how nice I am to Xue'er, I can't make up for the guilt I feel towards my sister."

"As long as you can be kind to Xue'er and be responsible to Xue'er, sister - I will never blame or hate you in this life, and will be willing to treat you this way. I am willing to be bullied by you"

"sister! I swear, I will be responsible for Xueer, but it is you who I like and love——"

"It doesn't matter, it's not important. If I don't believe you, how could I be fooled by you so easily? Are you so willing to be bullied by you? Hanging out with you? At first, sister, I really just saw you as pitiful and felt sorry for you, but in the end, you took advantage of me. My sister clearly knows that after you settled here, the most distressed person in your heart was Xueer. She also promised that she would be responsible for her in the future and bring her to live in the city. Do you know your promise to Xueer, your uncle and aunt, and your hope for Xueer? How much hope and hope do you have? But my sister still couldn't control herself. She was so fascinated by you that she willingly degenerated into what she is now. What I owe most in my life is Xueer, my uncle and aunt"

"sister! My whole life has been almost occupied by you. I don’t know how I will face Xueer in the future.——"

"So, we both owe Xueer. You must be good to Xue'er and be responsible to Xue'er, so that I can get over this hurdle in my heart. Now, sister is taking care of you and fooling around with you on her behalf. If you fail her in the future, she will really have no choice but to die to apologize."

"sister——"

I don't know why, as soon as Zhang Xiaolian mentioned the word 'death', my heart skipped a beat. A series of familiar faces like Mi He, Ling Zi, Wu Wenyan, and Mi Fu suddenly appeared in my mind. As these familiar faces loomed and lingered, my mood became extremely depressed, and I could not hide the fear and anxiety in my heart.

I stood up in panic and walked aside silently, trying my best to calm myself down. My unusual behavior immediately aroused Zhang Xiaolian's doubts. She also stood up silently and walked quietly behind me. hug me intimately

"what? So nervous? Sister, just say it casually!"

I suddenly turned around, knelt down, and hugged her legs tightly:"Sister! sorry! I'm a bastard! I'm not human!"

Zhang Xiaolian quickly squatted down and looked at me anxiously:"What's wrong? What happened? Don't be anxious, don't be anxious, tell me slowly!"

"I——"

I was shy and impatient, vague, and confessed all the ridiculous things I had done on the water conservancy construction site with Mi He and those crazy girls - and sure enough, Zhang Xiaolian also Before I could finish speaking, she angrily pushed me to the ground and turned to leave. When I saw it, I panicked and jumped on her without thinking about myself, throwing her to the ground again. She also became angry and punched me hysterically. kick、

"I know that none of you men are good, you are all animals in heat, brainless pigs. When I see a beautiful girl, I lose my soul. You are so obsessive and daring that you gave away four young ladies in one breath - do you really think you are an emperor? You are simply seeking your own death. You deserve to die, but you deserve to die!"

I was vented, abused, humiliated and cursed by Zhang Xiaolian. I was actually not afraid of anything and didn't care about anything. I was always like a mangy dog, hugging her tightly and not letting go no matter what. I was afraid She left me and walked away, never paying attention to me again.

She finally got tired of beating and scolding her, and begged me to let go of her. She also swore she would never abandon me or ignore me.

In fact, Mi and I It’s not like she didn’t know about the entanglement between He and the crazy girls. Long before going to the water conservancy construction site, she sternly ordered me how to cut through the mess quickly, and I followed her instructions. But what was the result? ?A few crazy girls not only weren’t afraid or bought it, but they also threatened to fight me to the death. Then wouldn’t my death be more unjust and miserable? Besides, these little girls may not be as complicated as Zhang Xiaolian thought, or what they said. Insidious! In fact, they are roughly the same as her. Because of these stereotypes, these feudal dross, this depression, this confusion of right and wrong in the countryside, they are only looking for self-relief and self-comfort for themselves in me. This is neither affection nor love, it is just loneliness, boredom, and extreme helplessness; mutual exclusion, that's all.

"That works! You are so self-righteous! Look how he died in the end! I told you that the world between men and women is actually a layer of window paper. Separated by this layer of paper, we will be passers-by all our lives. If we break through, anything will happen."

"That is to say, they and I have already broken through this layer of window paper?"

"Isn’t that the case?"

"I didn't want to, and I was afraid, but——"

"alright! The matter has come to this, nothing more can be said! I would like to remind you one last time. From now on, when you are with a few little girls, you should try your best to control yourself. They are all little girls. You must not treat them like your sister and be easy to bully."

"sister! They and I are just ordinary friends, just because the countryside is too neurotic.——"

"Stop making excuses for yourselfIt's obvious that he is a rogue with bad morals, yet he still insists on putting money on his face. I won't believe your nonsense"

"sister——"

"alright! If I have a good relationship with you, sister, no matter if you are a good person or a bastard, I will admit it and be devoted to you, without any regrets. In the future, if I get married, I won’t be able to take care of you and accompany you at any time like now. You have to be more careful yourself. Those crazy girls are all little girls who have never experienced anything and don’t understand anything. Now you are considered an expert. I have been with you for such a long time and I have taught you everything I need to teach you. From now on, you and them will be just in case. Then you must at least learn to protect others and yourself. Otherwise you will die without a burial place!"

"sister——"

I couldn't control it anymore and held her tightly in my arms. With tears and excitement, he expressed his guilt and fascination with her. There was no hint of coyness or reluctance on her part. Our ambiguity seems to be pure desire and confusion. But I know that only she occupies my whole heart.