Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Gumihou: Deleted most of the 'Ahhh!! I'm scared' x many, many times and tighten up the writing in general. Too many changes to note.

The next morning, at Fer's request, I made everyone a breakfast of Yakiniku Bowl with plenty of meat on nostalgic portable stoves that had fallen out of use ever since I had gotten the magic stove.

Once breakfast was over, it was time to get down to the very serious business of Behemoth Hunting.

We all got onto Grandpa Gon's back and began tracking down the evil Behemoth that had destroyed my magic stove.

"A-aughh…"

I had been filled with determination before Grandpa Gon launched himself into the sky. I was now filled with nausea and air sickness… I tried focusing on other things to lessen the feeling of nausea…

"… -go that way,"

"Umu, very well."

Arrghhh, wherever 'that way' was, it banked hard to the side, which was not at all pleasant on my stomach…

I tried looking over Grandpa Gon's shoulders, they did say to combat air sickness, one should look into the horizon or something…

"… …" well, it sort of worked, until I looked down…

"Go right again," said Fer.

Augghhhh….

What the heck is happening??!!

"Umu, it looks like the Behemoth is on the move. It may be trying to evade us."

"… …" so this was all the Behemoth's fault!!?? I knew I was not that bad when flying on GG Airways before this.

"Left now."

Arrghhh…

Finally, after what felt like forever, but probably closer to 10 minutes, Fer said, "There, that cave."

"Hmm, so, it thinks it could hide from us there?"

""I'll go check it out!!"" Dora-chan called out as he launched himself into the air and flew down.

""Bad monster~!!""

"Ah, Sui…"

Too late, Sui was already free falling down… along with Fer.

"Oi!! Come out!" Fer yelled into the cave.

""Oi!!!""

""Bad monster~!!!""

With a thump, Grandpa Gon landed at the mouth of the cave. I gratefully slid down and hugged the stable ground.

Grandpa Gon shouted, "If you don't come out, we'll go in and get you!!!"

All was quiet for a moment. Then, I felt it. A rumble that went through my entire body. I blinked.

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Thump. Thump. Thump.

"It's coming!" Fer roared.

Gurroooooo!!!!

""Hahah!! There you are!!""

""Bad monster~! Sui will beat you~!!""

"You stole our dinner, pay with your life," Fer growled.

"Hmm, this is a world where the strongest survive, don't think badly of us," Grandpa Gon said grandly.

"… …" I had nothing to contribute to the wave of aggressive opening dialogues. I was too busy squinting my eyes at something…

""Here we goo!!!""

""Meat~~!!!""

"Stop!!! Stop! Stop! Stop!" I shouted, leaping to my feet and running forward.

Fortunately, my familiars stopped attacking.

""Aruji~?""

""Eh? What?""

"Stop, I mean, look at the Behemoth's feet."

Under the gigantic monster, were… two small wriggling balls. They were…

"Oh? So, this creature has younglings with it?"

"Umu, looks like it…"

"Guwoooo!!!"

"Fufufu, I supposed that explains its unexpected ferocity,"

"And the need to hide, humph, don't think that I would lose to such a-"

"Wait!! Fer, what are you talking about?! That Behemoth has kids, don't tell me you're going to attack it?"

"Why not?"

"Why n- whyyy???"

"It ate our dinner, it should pay with its life."

"Indeed."

"No!! That's it's just some meat, I mean, I can make it again."

"Humph, for a creature to have children, it must be strong to protect them. If they are too weak, that's their fault." Grandpa Gon said matter-of-factly.

"Indeed."

"… …" what kind of dystopia world have I fallen into? "Don't tell me, you are willing to leave those children without a parent to protect them?!"

"Umu, if you are worried…"

Hahhh… did I finally get through to Fer?

"…I'll kill the children too."

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Hiii!!!

"What?! Wh-wh-why would you say something so terrible?!"

The Behemoth babies were making whimpering sounds now. Did they somehow sense Fer's terrible intent? Ugh, I have to stop my crazy familiars from acting out. Think, what should I say to make them stop?

However, the only thing I could think of was, "Stop, just stop it, let's just go home. I want to go home."

"Eeehhhhh…"

"Don't you guys 'eeehhh' me, we're going back, that's final."

"Nuu, it ate my dinner."

"I can make the dinner again."

"…your magic stove…"

"I have plenty of money. I can buy a better one!"

"Kuuh… you said you made meatballs? I want the same thing!"

""No, I want something else. I want, uh, I want…""

Dora-chan was clearly just trying to make trouble for me and score more food, but I was willing to indulge him.

"I have lots of minced meat thanks to Sui. I can make Salisbury steaks, minced meat cutlets, different kinds of meatballs…"

""Salisbury steaks~! With white stuff inside~~""

Ah, Sui-tan~ thank you for jumping onto this suggestion.

"Ou, Sui wants Cheese-in Salisbury Steaks," I said loudly. "A very good choice, Sui always has very good taste."

""Yay~~""

"Umu, Salisbury steaks sounds good," was Fer's slightly reluctant remark. "Fine, but I want all meat steaks. Extra thick steaks."

"Oho? Is this food a different kind of steak?" asked Grandpa Gon curiously. "I don't believe I ever had it."

""Fufu, meat and cheese are very good together,"" said Dora-chan knowingly. ""However, I must say the attraction point of Salisbury Steaks had to be its sweet and savoury sauce. The sauce makes the steaks! It is especially tasty with bread.""

"Umu, I want fried eggs on the steaks."

"Fried egg? How do you fry eggs?"

"Humph, you don't even know what fried eggs are? Well…"

Hahhh… at least my familiars are now distracted by the prospect of food. Really, these gluttons…

Anyway, thanks to them being distracted by thoughts of food (and a sense of superiority over an indulgent Grandpa Gon) we quickly left the place via GG Airways.

As we rose over the hills, I look down at the disappearing sight of the increasingly tiny Behemoth and its two offspring.

Hopefully, we never meet again.

[Gumihou: Okay, I'll admit it, I took a lot of liberties. It was mostly action and confrontation scenes, Eguchi-san's weak point.]

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