This Hero is Sleeping!

A loud blast woke Elric up.

It was annoying. He really, really didn't want to wake up.

A beautiful dream of a king-sized fantasy bed was awaiting him, but instead, he was pulled away from the king-sized bed made with the leather of a dragon and was smacked back into reality.

On a fucking couch.

In the boonies.

A boony couch.

Trash upholstery. Absolutely garbage suspension. A wack job in the name of leveling and padding. And one wasn't to even get him started on the choice of material and maintenance. Which fucker would use jute for a couch? Which one? Bring them out and bring them out right now! He'll only talk, with fists, that is.

Elric was still lying down when a loud bang entered his ears. It was different from the explosive sound before. More like someone banging on the door. Elric sat up and pushed his hair back. He tied his long hair in a ponytail that reached the ends of his shoulder blades and stood up. The anger from being woken up hadn't even peaked and someone was now also forcing him to get off the bed. The banging sounds continued, from the door, then the one at the back. Eventually, loud bangs came in from the windows and the walls as well.

"OPEN UP!"

"OPEN THE DOOR, YOU BASTARDS!"

They were the villagers, no doubto.

Elric carefully walked up to the windows and peeked outside. For some reason, the blinds were open on one of them and the frame was only shut. The meticulous Claude was nowhere to be seen as well.

A picture painted itself in Elric's head, the events that had gone by falling into place one after another. He was a genius, after all. Weak and lazy as he was, they were none other than the defining qualities that the race called genius' shared.

He could tell everything that had transpired with a single look.

"Claude, you fucker. You betrayed me!"

He could tell everything... to an absurdly inaccurate degree.

"Fine. Come." There was only one place to escape from, which was the window that Claude had used and the villagers hadn't noticed yet, but instead, Elric went back into the room. And soon, that escape route was taken too.

***

Claude pushed away the floorboard and lifted himself. With a simple twist, he found himself sitting on the ground of the church with his legs dangling down below. The bastard village chief had left first. It sucked, but no way could that old coot outrun him anymore. Claude carefully placed the floorboard back and rushed out of the church.

Not so far away, he could see the figure of the old man, clasping his hands together in a prayer of sorts. Right next to him were firecrackers that had been set off.

"Fuck. They were on standby?"

"Not much you can do." The Lord of the Shadows' voice reached Claude's ears again, earning a frown from him. "Think of it," he said. "Why would the villagers try to attack a C-Ranked adventurer? Do they truly have that much confidence?"

Those words sent a soft jolt through Claude. "No... they were planning to make the snake fight us."

"They wouldn't have agreed to bring you guys." Tempting. The voice tempted Claude to end things, but he was too used to it to pay that desire any heed. "The snake is childish. It will work should one ask."

Claude had been feeling great unease from the snake. It did make sense, now that he thought about it. They didn't only about a C-Ranked's performance, but also decided to fight.

"This is bad, isn't it? Maybe you should hand over your body and I'll help that kid?"

A chuckle escaped Claude as the old man walked away. The Lord of the Shadows had a way with words, too bad, his mind wasn't sharp. Within moments, distant bangs and screams flitted to Claude's ears.

"Help Elric?" He shook his head and walked in the direction opposite from the houses and toward the mansion instead. "Fool, I wanted to save those villagers."

"Hm?"

Claude decided to let the old man go. There was no need to put his hands in mud when the mud was about to obliterated.

"That aside... the ghost and the snake bother me more. What kind of sick freak would speak like that?"

***

As if choreographed beforehand, the mobbing villagers all tore through the doors and windows of the house at once. Crashes and splatters mixed with screams and groans as the glass windows broke into bits while the wooden doors bent and broke under their weight.

"T-there...

"G-get her—"

The villagers all froze in their tracks as their eyes fell on the person in front of them. Long auburn hair fashioned into a ponytail draped down his face and softly caressed his shoulder, as if afraid to offend it. His rosy lips glistened temptingly while his pure eyes shone brighter than the moon itself. The skin that would make even the proudest of estheticians and alchemists beg for the secret of glowed under the moonlight as if the moonlight itself had only come down to meet him.

Slowly, softly, the man swayed the Bordeaux glass in his hands. The half-filled water circled the rim of the glass, taking the attention of the villagers around with each of its movements. What could they do? Staring at the beauty of that man for too long was too much for them to handle, the glass was their only reprise.

The thought of capturing and mauling him for their 'divine beast' left everyone's mind and—No. They couldn't think of anything. As if they were placed under a curse, as if the man in front of them was the forbidden apple and the will of the person their evil queen, their Grimhilde. Not a thought entered their mind, they could see him and only him.

"Do you..."

He said, softly twirling his glass to a stop. With graceful movements akin to those of the most gorgeous flowers, he lifted the Bordeaux glass to his lips and slowly drank but a drop of water.

"Do you," he repeated. His eyes shifted to the ones all around him. The villagers gulped under the man's fierce gaze. His fingers loosened.

The glass fell, with it, the eyes of everyone around.

Like the first drop of rain in a draught-struck world, the unrelenting glass splashed against the ground with all its might. Tiny shards of glass rolled about the floor.

"Know love?"

"Huh?"

The water coalesced into a spike and tore through the head of the one closest to Elric. The boy stood up and dusted his hands.

"Bad luck Claude isn't here," Elric's voice rang through the room. The devil down below had rung his knell in the form of this man in front of them. "You might have just lived."