The Villainess and I, her Zombie

After the initial scare faded, since it turned out that the village wasn't getting raided by the enemy forces, there was nothing else to do but celebrate!

Well, not exactly – the first order of business was to elect the members of the elven community that would be delegated to request the audience with the queen in order to give a detailed summary of all the crimes against the elven race committed by the main branch of the Envy family thorough the years.

It should be done fast, efficiently, and preferably stealthy, as the Envy family – and more importantly the avatar of envy – might catch the wind of what was about to happen.

Though – since the hidden village in the Great northern forest of the Envys territory wasn't the only elven settlement in the kingdom – surely there has been at least one elf that showed up in the royal palace and attempted to explain everything, when it came to evidence against one of the seven main families, a term 'too much evidence' simply did not exist.

"Yo, I have a deal with the Greeds, if I'll go with you, they should let us in without too much delay."

While the village elder and the two most powerful elves in the village were in the middle of a heated discussion about who should go and who should stay behind just in case if Envys might try something, the blue undead asked while hugging and patting the head of the young dragon who missed him dearly.

"NO! You just got here – and more importantly – could you explain why did you come home and brought ANOTHER WOMAN with you?!"

But none of the elves was as fast to respond to him like the red-haired girl waiting by his side while pointing at the confused young kobold child.

"...another woman...?"

Zombie raised his brow and looked between Cranberry and Raika with disbelief.

"Umm, miss, I'm only eight years old..."

Judging by the regretful tone in the kobold girl's voice, she was not only aware of the part that Zombie was missing, but was also regretting the supposed age difference.

"What about it? Zombie is eleven! Ah...!"

The red-haired girl scoffed furiously – and almost instantly gasped, realizing her mistake.

"...eh...? Mister Zombie is so young...?! But he is so big!"

"!!!!!"

There certainly was a bashful realization in Raika's voice that made Cranberry flinch and grit her teeth.

"No! Don't even think about it, you thieving cat... dog!"

The red-haired girl gasped, while her face turned way brighter shade than her hair, and clung to Zombie's side, pushing his left hand forward together with her own.

"Look! Look at the rings! Zombie and I are married, understand?! So back off and don't even think about whatever you were about to think about!"

Cranberry shouted furiously, fumbling her words quite spectacularly while waving her hand and shooing the young kobold girl away.

Zombie would really prefer to return to more important matters at hand, but it really wasn't in the cards as all the elves smiled and nodded with understanding, moving aside and making some room for the kids to play - even though whatever was happening wasn't just a childish game for the red-haired Cranberry.

"Hey, Cranberry, aren't you overrea..."

"Eh...? But you are too young to really be a wife, and even if it's for real, you are only mister Zombie's first wife then, right? The rest of the spots are open!"

Not even letting the blue undead finish his sentence, Raika clapped her hands and nodded with a happy smile.

"No! Stop! I don't like where this is going!"

Zombie couldn't really remain quiet after hearing that – he grabbed Cranberry's shoulder and pulled her away, freeing his left arm and taking a step to the aside, using Baron's large body to shield himself from either one of the girls.

"Master, you are looking for more wives?! I book one spot!"

"SSSSSS?! (HUUUUUUUUUH?!)"

But that wasn't a safe spot either, as the blue undead was attacked from his blindspot – Kopia in her humanoid form jumped at his back and called out hurriedly as if this was some sort of race, and her words caused the golden snake on her ear stop acting like an earring and hiss in panic.

"You...! Don't talk nonsense – look, the old man Gooseberry is looking at me with murderous intent!"

Zombie complained, leaning down and making the humanoid sword get off of him.

"Nah, he is like this because he knows that Cranbie would like to have a spot too~"

"..."

Kopia giggled and waved her hand dismissively – Causing Cranberry to glare at her furiously for blabbing away something that she should keep secret – no, something that the humanoid sword should not be aware of in the first place.

"Seriously, you all, stop it – the marriage is for the living – the vows go until the death do us part – well, I am an undead – whatever oath you are talking about, it is null and void. End of subject."

Zombie frowned and eaved his hand sharply to visualize his decisiveness.

"Oh – no it does not! I've been studying on the subject and if an undead makes a promise they are bound by it until they will be re-killed or perish in any other way, natural one or not!"

Cranberry stepped forward, shaking her head, without the slightest intention of finishing the conversation then and there.

"Wha...?! Where did you even read that?! Humans believing in the system faith are considering undead as unclean, repugnant monsters and believe them to be altering the life stories of the living if engaged in prolonged contact of any sort! There's no way they would write down anything like what you just said!"

The blue undead furrowed his brows and shook his head from left to right, slightly irked for being called out.

"I didn't find it in a human book – it was written by the ancient elves – there was a book like this in the library!"

The red-haired girl shrugged her shoulders and exclaimed proudly while intentionally hiding that the part she was talking about was about completely different kinds of oaths...

"...library...?"

Zombie frowned and instantly turned to the previously angry-looking purple-haired guardian of the archives, Gooseberry – who conveniently chose that exact moment to hurriedly look the other way,

...sweating profusely...

...so maybe the timing of him looking away was not coincidental at all...

"More importantly – what is it about having many wives?! Neither elves nor humans are okay with that!"

Cranberry used that moment to ask about the matter that bothered her the most and glared down at the younger kobold girl.

"Eh? Why? You are all so weird – it's normal for strong males to have many wives, right? Grandpa always told me that he had ten beautiful wives in his youth before he had to escape from the lust territory."

Raika's eyes widened as she responded, tilting her head in confusion.

"...ah... lust territory and kobolds are an entirely different matter..."

Cranberry flinched and raised her hand in defeat while looking away to hide the drops of sweat showing up on her forehead.

She was not going to engage in a discussion about the matter that was way out of her league.

---

"Ssss... (Kopia, are you serious about becoming master's wife...?)"

Using all the hustle and bustle, Monty, the tiny golden serpent raised its head and hissed into Kopia's ear even though it wasn't really necessary since the humanoid sword was reading its mind through the physical contact.

"Hmmm? No? Why would I? I am master's property, I'm not interested in becoming his wife."

The crimson-haired girl furrowed her brows and answered, looking away from the blue undead arguing with, everyone except Baron, who was too young and confused to understand what was going on.

"Ssss?! (Huh?! B-but you said that you want master to save you a spot!)"

Monty flinched and hissed in shock.

"Ummm, I only wanted to book a spot for Patience, though? Why do you even ask, gold?"

Kopia asked tilting her head in confusion.

"Sss! (Ah!) Sss... (Ummm...) Sssss...! (Arrrrgh, I'm dead...!)"

"Gold...? GOLD!"

But the golden snake gasped and dodged the answer by hanging down limply from Kopia's ear, faking its death, causing the crimson-haired girl to cry out in panic.