The Undying Mecha Emperor

Receive him as your Lord, acknowledge his rule and reign, and you shall dominate the world. Stand against him in war, and you shall be ruined. Beware the black dragon. Beware the black dragon. Beware the black dragon." Princess Louisa finished softly.

"Hahaha! See! You need to convince your whole Empire to serve me and serve me well!" I roared with laughter as I basked in the awesomeness of their prophecy about me.

"To think that both the Chinese Federation and the European Empire both have prophecies about me. I feel kind of humbled. Many people have been waiting for my arrival huh? Hehehe." I continued to chuckle. "Quick tell your daddy to name me the Crown Prince and prepare to merge the Empire with the Federation!"

"I am afraid we can't do that. The Crown Prince has already been named, and he will be taking the throne very soon. The day of his Ascension as King is going to be the day of our invasion." Princess Louisa said softly.

"Huh? Why would you guys go to war without the black dragon? If he's not on your side then you guys will lose!" I said in confusion for a brief moment before I finally realized what was happening. "Unless…"

"The Crown Prince's name is Richard Draco. His nickname is the Black Dragon. He wields the Royal Sword Excalibur, he commands the Empire's most elite Black Dragon Army, and he…" Princess Louisa's face fell at that moment.

I instinctively knew what was coming even before she said the words aloud.

"He is the man your father wants you to marry?" I asked softly.

Princess Louisa nodded miserably.

"Why are you so miserable? He is probably a dashing young man, full of yummy pectoral muscles with biceps the size of ostrich eggs. And like you so proudly proclaimed just now with regard to your potentially large breasts, what's there not to like about such a hot and sexy young man?" I asked with a laugh.

But Princess Louisa only sighed deeply as though she was shouldering the heaviest burden in the world.

With slow and sluggish movements, she typed something into the mecha's control panel and made a hologram of a person appear.

I winced in physical pain as soon as my eyes fell upon him. "Damn it! What the hell? I need to unsee this! Gahhh!!"

That man was singularly the most repulsive looking son of a monster I have ever seen. Even to this day.

Thin, stringy grey hair very, very reluctantly covered a portion of his pockmarked head which was freakishly lumpy and looked like as though horrifying bugs were squirming within his scalp.

His squirrelly black eyes were abysmally irritating to look at, and layers of oily fat barely covered by skin covered his cheeks all the way down to his stringy mustache and beard.

He did not have a neck.

His head just continued down to his squishy shoulders which looked completely unable to support the weight of his elaborate dragon head shoulder pads.

And those were the good parts.

Below his shoulders…

"What the hell? Which undersea monster and demon spawn mated to create this ugly bastard?!" I shouted in horror. "Is that even a human being's body? Why is it so bloody round? There's no way a human being can become so perfectly round like that! It's… it's just not possible! Not even a mother with 9 kids in her womb can become so round!"

Princess Louisa merely sighed very deeply once more.

"How is this a Black Dragon?! This is obviously just a Black Ball!" I continued my horrified shouting. "Shrink this dude to 1 meter tall, and all the gyms in the world will pay to have him as a gym ball!"

Princess Louisa sighed once more and tapped on the control to make the hologram life sized.

"This is his real height." She said, fully depressed.

The already freakishly ugly hologram at 1.7 meters tall shot up to around 2.2 meters tall, and multiplied the horror of looking at him by at least a factor of ten. Or a hundred.

"F*ck!" I cursed as I fought back a huge urge to punch his ugly face and erase it from the face of this earth.

A deluge of at jokes flooded my mind at that moment, and I simply couldn't help but say a few of them aloud.

"This bastard is SO FAT, when he jumps… wait. He can't jump!" I shouted.

I admit, it wasn't very funny. But of all the jokes I could say, I said the very thing that made Princess Louisa more depressed.

She tapped on the console again and switched to video mode.

The hologram changed to show that Black Ball riding on what looked like a massive mechanical dragon.

It was floating alone before a veritable sea of what seemed to be blue mechas led by a couple of white mechas.

He was in his usual round armor, but he was single handedly wielding a massive greatsword that was obviously a peerless treasure. It was giving out serious tingles in my sixth sense even though it was just in hologram mode.

"Is that greatsword Exca- holy smokes! Is he wearing leg thrusters?" I shouted. "What the hell? He isn't!!"

The Black Ball had just leapt off his mechanical dragon with Excalibur raised high. And instead of falling off the dragon like all extra fat dudes, he actually shot off the dragon like a young man leaping off a trampoline!

WHAMMM!! CRAAAAAAAACKKKKKK!!!!

His Excalibur smashed upon one of the white mechas on its head, and proceeded to slash it in half as he made his way down to the ground.

And after he destroyed that first white mecha, he went on to destroy the other white mecha within one short minute.

And in the next five minutes, I watched the Black Ball and his mechanical dragon massacre the army of blue mechas.

He was ruthless, bloodthirsty, and freakishly skilled in the art of war. All that, above and beyond his ugly but frightfully strong physique which I dare say was one of the strongest in the world.

At that moment, I had no idea who would win if I had to take him on in a one on one fistfight.

But the main takeaway for me in that five minutes of senseless massacre was not the Black Ball.

Hell no. He can go to hell and explode into a billion pieces for all I care.

I had my eyes on two more interesting things all the time. And much better looking, of course. I would not be able to sit through the entire five minutes quietly if I was paying attention to him.

"I want the blueprint of that mechanical dragon." I announced after the hologram display of the massacre ended. "And Excalibur. Damn that sword is epic."

"Feel free to take them." Princess Louisa said with obvious eagerness in her voice. "Take them from his broken, lifeless fingers after you slice him up like triple layered roast pork! Ever since he was named the Black Dragon of the Prophecy and Crown Prince, he has been a complete terror upon the Empire."

"That's another question I have for you. Why are you guys so sure that he's the Black Dragon? I mean, he is good at fighting. But what makes him the fulfillment of the prophecy?" I asked curiously.

"The very nature of prophecies is that, it is hard to be completely sure if its real or not until its fulfilled. We are not fully certain that he is the Black Dragon. But my father… He is somehow convinced for some reason. And after this monster wiped out every single rebel organization within six short months without losing a single battle, my father's conviction rose to… sigh." Princess Louisa sighed deeply and was unable to go on.

"Her father must have given her to that Black Ball as a future wife." I thought to myself. "In a way, she has quite the tragic story. No wonder she is so fully pissed off all the time."

"So your earlier boast that you can marry anybody you want… And your plan in bringing me back to the Empire…" I let my words trail and raised my eyebrow questioningly at her.

"I AM free to marry whomever I choose!" Princess Louisa said fiercely. "I would rather die than marry that… that… Black Hairy Ball! And no one can convince me otherwise!"

"I see. This truly is a resounding mess. But lucky you, I am the true Black Dragon. And as your prophecy has stated so clearly, they who stand against me in battle will definitely die. So I guess that Black Ball would be dying pretty soon. Don't you worry." I smiled at her reassuringly.

"Yes! That's right! And then we WILL be married! Just as the secondary prophecy proclaims!" Princess Louisa said happily.

"Wait, what? There's a secondary prophecy?? And we'll be married?!" I asked her in shock.