The Monk That Wanted To Renounce Asceticism

Panda Novel

“Even if you aren’t professional, that’s scary enough…” Ong smiled bitterly.

Salted Fish shook his head and twisted his body. “To think there’s water here. Not bad, not bad at all. I haven’t showered in days. One, two, three, wee!”

As he spoke, Salted Fish leaped up and plunged into the tiny stream on the ground.

Fangzheng pricked up his brows but didn’t stop him. Instead, he watched with a chuckle.

Ong facepalmed, finding it an unbearable sight.

Then, they heard a loud bang!

Salted Fish’s head was bent ninety degrees as his body was erected like a flag. His eyes were filled with confusion as he exclaimed. “Who the hell placed a pane of glass here!?”

Ong said, “If there were really water flowing in the room, it would turn the room humid. This water is flowing beneath the glass and only meant for decoration.”

Salted Fish got up, scanned his surroundings, and headed for the bathroom, peeved. Before long, the bathtub was filled with water. Salted Fish didn’t forget to scatter some flower petals before jumping in to have an enjoyable bath. He harrumphed as he said, “Reverend, aren’t the two of you bathing? Man, this is what you call life. Reverend!”

With Salted Fish yelling out in comfort, Ong immediately felt the urge to take a bath. Hence, he looked at Fangzheng with a questioning look.

Fangzheng shook his head and said, “This Penniless Monk won’t use the bathtub he uses.”

Ong grinned and said, “It’ll be the same after I scrub the fish tank clean.” Inwardly, he thought, “This monk sure is a hygiene freak.”

Fangzheng continued shaking his head as he looked at the scenery outside. His vantage point allowed him to see Hoàn Kiếm Lake.

Ong didn’t say a word. As Salted Fish kept crying out in pleasure, he kept producing splashing sounds, making Ong’s urge to bathe stronger.

Later, Salted Fish walked out with a towel around him with a toothbrush in his mouth, looking like a modern salted fish, Ong finally couldn’t hold it in. He rushed over…

“Heh! It’s quite smelly!” Ong mumbled.

Ten minutes later.

“Why is it still smelly?”

Half an hour later.

“F**k! Screw this, I’m not bathing any longer! How many years has this salted fish not bathed? The fish tank is filled with his stench!” Ong finally understood Fangzheng’s rationale. No one could bring themselves to enter the bathtub like this!

Salted Fish lay languidly on a sun bed and harrumphed. “I’m in water quite often, but for a proper bath, the last one was probably three thousand years ago?”

“Ugh!” Ong felt disgusted the moment he thought about how he had been scrubbing bathing water of someone who hadn’t bathed in three thousand years. He hurriedly ran to the side to wash his hands.

After the day’s gathering, the organizing committee arranged a sumptuous dinner in the evening. It was held at the Caodaism Hall on the thirty-sixth floor. Furthermore, it was pointed out that one couldn’t bring others along.

Helpless, Fangzheng had no choice but to go alone. However, before he left, he exhorted Ong to watch the salted fish and to prevent him from running everywhere. Meanwhile, to prevent the fellow from causing trouble, Fangzheng took away his divine powers.

Salted Fish lay there languidly, waving his fin. “Go on, go on. I’ve had a great day and have no plans of going anywhere. All I want is to have a quiet nap.”

Fangzheng looked at Salted Fish who had his eyes open all the time due to a lack of eyelids. After failing to tell anything, Fangzheng shook his head and left.

When Fangzheng left, Ong asked Salted Fish, “Are you asleep?”

Salted Fish jumped up and chuckled. “Of course not! Wouldn’t I have come for nothing if I didn’t take a look at all the people gathered?”

“Uh… Didn’t Master say that you aren’t allowed to leave?” Ong lamented inwardly.

“You aren’t leaving? What do you plan on doing here? Be a loser? Big guy, aren’t you curious what’s happening upstairs? Aren’t you curious about the food?” Salted Fish skipped to the door.

Ong hurriedly ran over to block him. “Master said that you are not allowed to leave.”

“Are you sure?” Salted Fish twirled his whisker and grinned.

Ong nodded forcefully and brandished his arms. “Although you are a demon, I’m not someone to be trifled with. You’ll have to get past me first!”

“Alright, Master is back!” Salted Fish cried out.

Ong didn’t know what kind of person Salted Fish was, so he subconsciously turned his head, only to realize that the door was still locked. He had been tricked! He hurriedly lowered his head to dodge!

But it was then that Ong recalled that Salted Fish wasn’t tall. By bending down, it was equivalent to bringing his face right in front of Salted Fish.

Indeed, Salted Fish grinned at him and slapped him.

Piak!

Creak. The door opened as Salted Fish clapped his fins. “With that brain of yours, why are you still looking at me? Sigh…”

With that said, Salted Fish walked out, leaving Ong with his eyes rolled back on the ground.

“Hmm, where do I go?” As Salted Fish ran around, he hummed a tune and began looking around without any destination in mind.

Meanwhile, in the monitoring room.

“Ah… I’m so tired. I’m beginning to see things from staring at so many monitors every day,” a security guard mumbled. When he swept his gaze, he instantly frowned. “Aren’t children not allowed for the summit? Why is there a child here?”

As the security guard mumbled, he focused only to have his eyes turn wide and round. He cried out. “Holy sh*t! It’s not a child but a fish! How is this possible?”

Following that, he saw the salted fish skipping around and even climbing up to the head of a statue to look around.

“That’s right. It’s really a fish! Is this the legendary mermaid? But this fellow doesn’t have anything to do with good looks…” the security guard mumbled. To be safe, he raised his walkie talkie.

Just as he was about to say something, there was a sound behind him. Turning back, he saw a fist hit him and with a bang, he was knocked out.

Following that, there was a deep voice from the monitoring room. “Cây, the monitoring room has been settled. The security here is really nothing!”

“Roger that.” A voice sounded from the walkie-talkie before there was silence.

When the owner of the voice began looking at the monitoring screens, there was nothing—no sign of Salted Fish. He sat there at ease, unaware of Salted Fish’s existence.

“Ooo, that’s a camera. I’ve seen that on Internet TV. I never expected this hotel to have so many of them. Thankfully, I was quick. Otherwise, I would have been discovered.” Salted Fish secretly peeped at the camera above from behind a statue.

At this moment, there was the sound of an approaching cart—a man was passing by with a cleaning cart. Salted Fish immediately took this opportunity to burrow into it. Sitting inside, he waited for the next stop.

Before long, Ong got up to his feet while rubbing his head. Realizing that Salted Fish was gone, he panicked. “This is a mission entrusted to me by Master. I can’t mess it up. I need to quickly find that salted fish!”