The Mightiest Little Peasant

“What? Jade talismans?”

An afro-sporting head popped in through the window. It was none other than the scoundrelly Trendy Taoist Master.

Shabby Taoist Master was shocked and nearly jumped.

He turned around and was ready to curse.

‘Dammit, does he have dog ears? How did he hear that?’

He quickly covered the phone and shook his head at Trendy Taoist Master. “No, no jade talismans! You must have misheard! Hahahaha!”

“Huh? Jade talismans?”

Another head popped in from the other side of the window.

‘…F*ck!’ Shabby Taoist Master cursed under his breath. He squeezed a smile on his face and shook his head like a rattle.

“No, no jade talismans!” He said sincerely.

“What? Jade talismans? Where?”

He heard a slight rustle of the tiles on his roof. Then, a head popped into the window from above.

Shabby Taoist Master rolled his eyes.

‘Dammit! Do they all have dogs’ ears?

‘And you too, don’t you have feet to walk on the ground? Why must you hang upside down like a bat?’

“No, no jade talismans!” Shabby Taoist Master explained one more time.

He had just finished his sentence when he heard a distant flurry of footsteps heading his way.

Bam! The door was kicked open, and a Taoist master rushed in. “Jade talismans? Where?”

He was wearing an apron and had a kitchen knife in his hand.

Shabby Taoist Master’s eyes nearly popped out of his sockets when he saw that.

“Hey, hey! What do you think you are doing? Put the knife down!” Shabby Taoist Master swallowed hard and smiled superficially.

The commotion was spreading.

“Jade talismans? Where?”

“I heard that something about jade talismans?”

“Hand over the jade talismans, Xuan Ling! Otherwise, we’re not friends anymore!”

The Taoist masters shouted and yelled while popping out from every corner of Mao Mountain. Some of them carried hoes, some carried buckets, and some were grabbing onto their pants, evidently having

rushed out of the bathroom.

They surrounded the door and looked at Shabby Taoist Master with cunning gazes.

Shabby Taoist Master was at a loss for words.

He covered his face in anguish.

‘Dammit, they’re all thugs!’

“Jade talismans? Where?”

Even the elderly Taoist masters received the news. They walked over to Shabby Taoist Master’s abode while carrying bowls of rice gruel, eating as they walked.

They came to Shabby Taoist Master’s door and looked expectantly at him.

“Excuse me, everyone, coming through! Don’t you know you should respect your elders? We are your seniors and are elderly. You’ll have to respect us.”

They squeezed into the abode and looked at Shabby Taoist Master with stern faces. “Oh, Xuan Ling, have you forgotten what I’ve taught you? If you have something good, then you should share it with us. Understand?”

“That’s right! Selfishness is a sin!”

“Alright, my dear Xuan Ling, can you tell me where the jade talismans are?” Their stern expressions were immediately replaced by cunning grins.

“It’s Fellow Cultivator Tang. He said earlier that he wants to sell jade talismans!” Shabby Taoist Master said miserably.

Everyone exclaimed in surprise when they heard that.

They excitedly took out their phones and dialed Tang Hao’s number so that they could be the first one to buy.

However, they realized that his number was engaged.

An elderly Taoist master noticed the phone in Shabby Taoist Master’s hand.

He lunged forward and grabbed the phone.

“Hahaha! I’ve got it!” He laughed.

“Pah! Watch this!” Another elderly Taoist master swept him off his feet and snatched the phone.

“F*ck! How dare you ambush me? Watch this: Black Tiger Snatches the Heart!”

“That move is too weak. Behold: Monkey Steals Peaches!”

“F*ck your mother! Don’t hit under the belt!”

The Taoist masters were engaged in a brawl. The phone kept on changing hands.

The phone flew through the air in an arc and plopped into a water-filled urn.

Everyone was stunned.

The elderly Taoist masters were also stunned.

“My Apple Six!” Shabby Taoist Master wailed.

Meanwhile, on the other end of the call, Tang Hao was baffled when the call was suddenly cut off.

‘Just what is going on there?’

Soon, back in the main hall of Mao Mountain, the Taoist masters sat in rows with Elderly Taoist Master Zhen Yang sitting in the middle. He was speaking to Tang Hao over the phone.

Tang Hao was awkward. “You’re asking for a little too much, Taoist Master. I don’t have that many talismans. I have four or five hundred talismans at most, but you all want a total of a few thousand.”

“Four or five hundred? That’s not enough to divide among all of us!”

“That’s right, that’s not enough!”

“How about we’ll bid for it? The person with the most money gets it.”

“Go away! Are you bullying me for being poor?”

The Taoist masters argued among each other.

Suddenly, someone yelled. “I’ll trade my medicinal herbs with your talismans! I have many rare herbs, Fellow Cultivator Tang, you must be interested in them.”

Everyone fell silent after they heard that.

Tang Hao slapped his thigh when he heard that.

‘Right, herbs! Why did I forget about that? All those Taoist masters must have their private collections from wandering around the land and slaying evil monsters. They must have gathered many rare ingredients.

‘Just like last time, their herbs filled up an entire truck.’

Tang Hao was immediately excited.

He had requested Liu Dajun and the other bosses to help him gather herbs, but their resources were limited.

He had also requested it from the Agency and the military. However, they were not as effective as the Taoist masters.

“Talismans for herbs, that settles it. I’ll trade as many talismans as you have herbs. Right, I have Artifacts! I can trade the Artifacts with herbs too,” Tang Hao said generously.

The main hall of Mao Mountain was instantly chaotic.

“Artifacts? Oh my god!”

“Fellow Cultivator Tang knows how to craft Artifacts too?”

The Taoist masters were jumping excitedly.

“Quick, let’s take out all our herbs!”

They rushed out of the main hall.

After discussing with the elderly Taoist masters, they decided that they would perform the trade in three days.

In those three days, Tang Hao stayed in the house and crafted talismans and Artifacts nonstop.

That morning, he drove his car toward Mao Mountain.

The Taoist masters of Mao Mountain had been waiting at the base.

All of them held a sack of different sizes in their hands. The smallest ones were the size of a backpack, while the big ones were hemp sacks packed full of herbs.

When Tang Hao got out of the car, he was surprised by the size of the crowd.

He exchanged some pleasantries with the Taoist masters and said, “Alright, let’s begin!”

Someone brought over a table and chair and paper and pen.

The Taoist masters stood in a line in descending order of seniority. The queue was as long as a dragon.

Tang Hao sat down. He looked at Taoist Master Zhen Yang, who was first in line. “Please sit down, Taoist Master!”

Taoist Master Zhen Yang grinned and placed the bulging hemp sack on the table.

Tang Hao opened the sack and looked inside.

His eyes immediately sparkled with excitement.