The Immortal's Poison

The Heaven’s Thunder calamity descended from the heavens like a majesty that looks at everything else with disdain. Just when it was about to clash with the rising Buddha-light, it shifted its angle slightly, barely missing the Buddha-light and continued its downward strike.

The crossing of the silver and golden heavenly lights was indeed a sight to behold.

The demon monk Bu Le’s face was full of shock, he did not understand why the calamity made a turn. He let out a strange cry, jumped to his feet and pulled Wen Leyang and Mumu behind him as he frantically ran away from the magic circle.

The expansive Heaven’s Thunder was like a shadow, following them everywhere.

The old demon monk knew that they could never outrun it, but not running wasn’t an option. He could not just look upwards idly and wait for Heaven’s Thunder to strike.

The monk Bu Le was worried but Wen Leyang was not. Ah Dan was holding on to his calf like a koala bear with a face full of dread…he was dreading for Wen Leyang.

A bright light swallowed everything in an instant.

The old monk Bu Le and Mumu had the sensation of a strong force erupting beside them, their bodies flung into the air like a bird that was hit by a giant. They screamed as they crashed sideways.

Even with almost two thousand years’ worth of cultivation, Bu Le was still disorientated by the crash. He was thinking about the others as he leaped up swiftly into action, but his body froze and his actions were stopped.

Ah Dan was flailing as he flew towards him…

For the demon monk Bu Le, the whole affair of passing the calamity in Wen village was too incredible. The one who was supposed to pass the calamity now flew into his embrace. Who would the lightning strike at then?

Ah Dan was still chivalrous, he clenched his little fists and made for the bright light after he regained his footing.

The bundle of dense and bright thunder was dancing and moving in a peculiar manner.

The old monk Bu Le held Ah Dan down, gave his own eyes a pinch and cast his magical power “insight” again. His watery gaze was as fast as lightning and pierced into the haunted Heaven’s Thunder calamity.

The “insight” heavenly gaze was clear and cold as a spring, but it did not stop the old monk Bu Le’s pupil expanding outwards, even outside the bounds of his sockets.

Wen Leyang was frantically running around in the light. No matter where he went, the majestic light would follow him without fail. Their tacit understanding was as if the main persona and the spotlight on a dark stage. The Heaven’s Thunder materialized into a silver snake, roaring, and trying slowly and laboriously inch by inch to burrow into Wen Leyang’s chest like a huge leech.

Mumu got to her feet and went to the old monk’s side. She was startled when she saw Ah Dan. It took her a moment before comprehending. She pointed towards the bright light, which was still jumping about and inquired, “Wen… Wen Leyang?”

The monk Bu Le raised his head to look at the sky, the Heaven’s Thunder calamity pierced the heaven and earth, it was incredibly long. He let out a sigh and answered, “This will take a while, let’s wait.”

…

Within the bright light, Wen Leyang was running about like a fly that lost its head. Slowly, he stood still, looked around at his surroundings. Seemingly tired of standing, he simply sat down on the ground, throwing occasional glances to the sky to see what was left of the Heaven’s Thunder’s length.

Ah Dan reclined beside Mumu, his little face full of worry, gritting his teeth while staring at the bright light.

The Wen Bucao who were hiding also came out.

The Grand Elder Wen tried to understand Wen Leyang’s situation, asked the old monk Bu Le worryingly and helplessly, “Holy monk, can you save him?”

The monk Bu Le let out a ragged sigh, shaking his head, “There’s nothing we can do but wait.”

Wen Xiaoyi raised her big-muzzled blunderbuss weapon, stomping her foot anxiously, “What is going on here? Who’s exactly passing the calamity?”

Bu Le pointed at Ah Dan, “Of course it’s this little guy, but the Heaven’s Thunder have been redirected by Wen Leyang. Heh…what is that jade knife exactly?”

Mumu was on the verge of tears, regret and worry filled her heart, “Will he… be in any danger?”

The monk Bu Le laughed drily, “He should be fine for now. He’s doing quite well in there, all that’s left is to give him a carrot.” He didn’t finish his sentence when Mumu and Wen Xiaoyi cried simultaneously.

The old monk was shocked and hurriedly changed the subject, “The calamity struck completely on Wen Leyang this time. Within three years, the little zombie would have to face another calamity at any time. The next calamity would be bigger than this. I’m afraid that even the ancestor herself would be powerless to help him.”

Mumu managed to stifle her sobs, although tears were still trickling down her face. She reached out and held Ah Dan snugly in her embrace, “Let it be! But tell me this, will the day Ah Dan resurrects be the day the calamity will strike?”

“He’s the reincarnating dead, the first calamity was supposed to strike when his heart and blood vessels connect, making him a living person.” The old monk’s face showed signs of fatigue. The execution of the magic circle and “insight” were extremely taxing on his cultivation. “But since he did not accept the calamity this time, he would maintain his current state and will only be reborn after the second calamity strikes. However…”

The old monk Bu Le did not finish his sentence. It was common knowledge that there was virtually no hope of surviving the second calamity. The Wen village plunged into a silence once again. Wei Mo was still busy calculating, probably calculating the time when Wen Leyang would be free from all this…

Finally, with a loud bang, the fiery cloud that was covering the sky disappeared alongside the Heaven’s Thunder calamity without a trace. The sky was sunny again in an instant. The sun could be seen rising on the horizon. A day has passed without anyone noticing.

Everyone was tense. The dense bright light slowly dissipated. A figure could be seen staggering out of it.

Wen Xiaoyi and Mumu cheered together and rushed towards Wen Leyang. The had just run two steps when a strong wind swept past them and a stampede of footsteps that were heavier than a rhinoceros sounded around them.

The Rain Wind Rainbow had beat them to Wen Leyang and were surrounding him, all talking at the same time. The conversation was indecipherable.

Wen Leyang ignored them. He pulled the red jade knife from his neck and jumped hastily in front of the old monk Bu Le, “Holy monk, this jade can absorb lightning. It…it must be cursed!” As he was saying this he threw the knife onto the ground as if it scalded his hand.

The scarlet jade knife was almost a complete silver. When it absorbed the lightning conjured by the head of the Jilong sect sword-bearer Qing Niao, only silver thunder marks appeared on the red blade. This time, after “swallowing” the Heaven’s Thunder calamity, the blade had become silver, occasionally showing signs of blood marks.

The old monk Bu Le ignored the red jade knife by his feet and spoke to Wen Leyang with a stern face, “Calm your mind, hold your breath and collect your energy!” As he was saying this, he cast his watery magic power “insight” again, checking his body.

After a moment’s pause, the old monk laughed, relieved, “The boy is fine!”

Everyone let out a relieved sigh. Wen Leyang was indifferent. The Poison of Life and Death was still flowing happily inside him, same as before.

The Heaven’s Thunder calamity was far more superior in terms of size or power when compared to the lightning conjured up by the Jilong sword-bearer. The scarlet jade knife had also grown. When it was absorbing the calamity, there was not any leak of vibrations. Wen Leyang did not even feel any signs of invading power and did not suffer damage like the last time.

The old monk picked up the jade knife lightly and scrutinized it. He chuckled and hung it back on Wen Leyang’s neck, “Nonsense, what curse? This is a valuable treasure. If it can even withstand the Heaven’s Thunder calamity, then which sect’s thunder skills can harm you?”

The old monk paused, his serious air turned into one of demonic mischievousness, “The most famous thunder skill in the path of true cultivation is the Jiong sect’s Ninth Heaven’s Thunder Conjuration.”

Ah Dan having to face the calamity made a huge ruckus, but he was unharmed. He was already riding the Delicate Pony and wandering around the village while grinning sheepishly.

Mumu and Wen Leyang had not seen each other in a long time. Their meeting was initially filled with joy, but because of their worry of Ah Dan, their faces were unhappy. Ah Dan was no longer acting like a zombie. Other than his still heart, he was the perfect image of a playful child. He was always by Mumu’s side at home, they were as close as can be.

Wen Leyang understood that Ah Dan would have to face another calamity within three years, he asked the old monk with a frown, “If the second calamity cannot be withheld, then we can just give Ah Dan the jade knife and let it absorb the Heaven’s Thunder. It’s better than doing nothing, no?”

Bu Le threw him a sideways glance, “Don’t be a fool! If Heaven’s Thunder missed the zombie a second time, do you know what would happen?”

He did not wait for a reply before continuing, “If the calamity missed twice, it would mean that the astronomical phenomenon is in chaos. This would invoke the Uncountable Time! Once the Uncountable Time is invoked, everything would be destroyed, returning to chaos…Of course, I have only heard about this, I don’t know if it’s true…”

The old monk was still talking when Wen Leyang’s phone rang.

Wen Leyang spoke on the phone for a short while and passed the phone to the old monk Bu Le, “It’s for you, from the Great Mercy Temple.”

Bu Le was startled. He muttered under his breath, “Why didn’t they just call me directly…right, my number’s barred.” He took the phone, the indistinguishable stammering voice of the little monk Hope Voice can be heard from the other end of the phone. The old monk’s expression grew weirder by the moment, but he eventually laughed.

After the phone call, the old monk rubbed his hands together while pacing merrily in the village. After a while, he smiled at Wen Leyang and the four elders of the Wen family, “The Jilong sect is really desperate this time. Their leader Zi Que will be personally leading them here to seek revenge.”

Wen Leyang did not understand which part of this is something to be happy about. He glanced at the monk bad-naturedly, “Give the phone back!”

“Er… habit,” the old rabbit demon blushed and took out Wen Leyang’s phone from his pocket. He returned the phone and continued while giggling, “Other than the elites of Jilong sect, the Kunlun sect, and Eyang sect also joined the fray. These three sects had been agreeable from the start. The heads of the three sects all went to the Great Mercy Temple, insisting that there must be demons hiding on the Nine Peaks Mountain. Haha, hahaha.”

Wen Leyang panicked, Jilong sect alone kept their hands full. Now three sects from the Five Blessings are coming all at once. This was bad.

Bu Le continued laughing for a while before returning to normal, but there was still irrepressible joy in his eyes, “Shan Duan has agreed to come along with the three sects to Nine Peaks Mountain for this matter. Heheh, finally some drama.”

Wen Xiaoyi was standing beside Wen Leyang. She looked at the happily laughing old monk Bu Le with gritted teeth, resisting the urge to blast him with her blunderbuss.

Within the Five Blessings, Jilong, Eyang, and Kunlun sects had always acted as one. The almost complete annihilation of the Jilong sect on the Nine Peaks Mountain and the death of tens of disciples was unheard of ever since evil was introduced into the world thousands of years ago. Not long after the incident, Eyang and Kunlun sect had stood forward and supported the Jilong sect. Judging by the looks of things they are determined to get their revenge.

The four elders of the Wen family looked at each other. Grand Elder Wen laughed heartily and spoke in a generous tone, “As long as we kill enough of them to make a name for ourselves, it does not matter even if our whole clan is wiped out!”

The old monk Bu Le was still a demon inside. Even the years of Buddhist cultivation cannot completely eliminate his stubborn instincts. He was elated when he heard that there would be a big ruckus. He hastily shook his head after hearing Grand Elder Wen’s words, “The old priests from the three sects thought that they could do whatever they want because they have the numbers. Hehe, my cultivation and Shan Duan’s would amount to three thousand years if they were added up. With only a few of them, they’re nothing…” If one were to truly compare the level of cultivation, the old rabbit demon indeed did not think too highly of the Five Blessings.

The old monk was laughing when he suddenly remembered something and asked First Uncle Wen Tunhai with a touch of shyness, “Do you…have any wigs in this village? If Shan Duan is coming, then I’ll disguise myself as a Wen elderly.”

First Uncle shook his head, “Can’t you conjure it up yourself, holy monk?”

Bu Le’s scowled, “You watch too much of Journey to the West…” He didn’t finish his sentence when his eyes widened suddenly. He shouted towards the direction of the mountain base, “Halt!”

A pony neighed in the distance. Ah Dan rode his Delicate Pony and rushed towards the village’s entrance, rubbing his hands in anticipation of capturing some demons.

A strained voice that was familiar to Wen Leyang was heard from the outside of the village, “Don’t attack, don’t attack, it’s us brothers…”

Wen Xiaoyi chuckled towards Wen Leyang, “Hey look! Your apprentices are back!”

Not long after that, a flurry of footsteps could be heard. A big group of strange people, numbering to a hundred, walked into the village mightily. The fat monk Shui Jing and the old monk Ji Fei was walking in front of the pack majestically.

Wen Leyang was shocked. After looking at the people behind the two, he realized that he knew most of them. They were the rogue cultivators whom he met while traveling to Mount Emei for the first time. The thick hair bare-chested fat guy Giant Bull, the powdered-face Red Grandaunt with a big red flower on her head, the stern-looking straight-backed old man Gongye…

Ji Fei and Shui Jing ran forward and greeted the old monk Bu Le with smiles.

Bu Le politely returned the gesture. It was these two old thieves who carried him and Shan Duan back to the Great Mercy Temple when they were injured. They were his life savior.

Ji Fei ran in front of Wen Leyang, displaying a show of shock and scrutinised him from head to toe, “You’re okay, you’re fine!”

Wen Xiaoyi chuckled, “You didn’t even greet him as master.”

Ji Fei pretended not to hear anything, the excitement on his face turned indignant, “My brother and I planned to travel all over the world. Suddenly we got word that three sects from the Five Blessings were coming to beat up us Wen Bucao. We immediately set out, traveling non-stop to rush back here!”

He pointed to the band of rogue cultivators, “All thanks to the old fairy Chang Li, us brothers were acquainted with them. Now that Nine Peaks Mountain is faced with a problem, it is the perfect opportunity to gather more manpower. We did not spare anyone, everyone able was called here!”

The monk Shui Jing nodded beside him, “This time the Five Blessings is sending out four of its forces, it’s a phenomenon that has never been heard of for a thousand years. News of this has already become a hot topic in the realm of true cultivation.”

Mumu sized the two up from the side with a sideways glance for a while until Shui Jing blushed out of embarrassment, daring not to meet her eyes. Mumu smiled, “Something doesn’t add up. Monk, speak the truth!” Mumu had known the two of them the longest. She knew that if the brothers were faced with this kind of situation, they would be the first to run away. Them rushing back here to help is unlike them.

The old monk cut in hastily, “Master…er, the sect is faced with trouble, us brothers…”

Wen Leyang too knew that the old monk’s words cannot be believed. He led Wen Xiaoyi, Mumu, and Ah Dan, the four of them stared at the fat monk Shui Jing with bright eyes…The fat monk Shui Jing’s lowered his head more and more. He kept at this for a while until he finally admitted, “Err… the word about us brothers accepting you as our master has gone out unexpectedly.”

Wen Leyang decided to strike while the iron was hot. He chuckled, “So?”

Shui Jing stared his small eyes, “So? Ancestor, we Wen have angered three sects of the Five Blessings in one go. If the old priests were to seek us for revenge, there would be no place on earth that’s far enough for us to go! Although Nine Peaks Mountain is in the heat of it all, at least we have the old fairy Chang Li here. Those bastards won’t be able to do much.”

Wen Leyang laughed, finally understanding, “So in fact, Nine Peaks Mountain is the safest place right now.”

The fat monk Shui Jing nodded. He laughed abruptly as if hit by a sudden bout of insanity, startling everyone, “This monk would return to the mountain and meet these three Five Blessings sects…Where is the old fairy Chang Li? I assume that she has already returned?”

Wen Leyang shook his head. He took out a carrot, “We have yet to hear from her.”

Ji Fei and Shui Jing paled, they managed a smile after a while, “It’s okay, it’s okay. If the fairy maiden is not here, we still have the holy monk…the holy monk won’t be leaving, right?”

The old monk Bu Le laughingly shook his head, “No, no, I won’t. This time I will be with everyone and face those old priests.”

The two monks let out a sigh.

Wen Leyang turned around incredulously and looked at the four elders. Grand Elder Wen smiled broadly, “Those who ascend the mountain are our good friends.”

The group of rogue bandits could hardly repress their excitement. They were much more interested in joining the fray for the sake of it rather than repaying the favor of Ji Fei and Shui Jing who rescued them from the Great Mercy Temple. The inability to defeat the Great Mercy Temple does not mean that they could not defeat the three sects. Those who ascended the mountain were brave masters.

The Wen village became lively in an instant. The rogue cultivators were rubbing their fists daily, discussing magic skills in groups, some even showed off their magic tools. Ah Dan was like a fish in water, making his way through the crowd on his Delicate Pony. Once the news that Ah Dan might invoke divine punishment at any minute was spread, the rogue cultivators would avoid Ah Dan like the plague wherever he went.

Seven days later, in the wee hours of the morning, a shout that was like a Spring thunder broke through the short-lived peacefulness of Nine Peaks Mountain. “Zi Que of the Jilong sect, bringing his disciples, humbly request a meeting with the Wen masters!”

A thick voice followed, “San Wei of the Eyang sect, coming up the mountain!”

The third voice was young and candid, the tone more polite, “Liu Zheng of the Kunlun sect, calling on the Wen Bucao of Nine Peaks Mountain.”

The fourth voice transmitted a sense of sincere friendliness, “The monk Shan Duan from the Great Mercy Temple, begs an audience with the elders of the Wen family. Amitabha, this monk is sorry for the rudeness.”

With Chang Li not being around, there is no one in the Wen family with a loud voice. The old rabbit demon Bu Le did not want to show his true strength yet, so he kept his mouth shut. The group of rogue cultivators looked at one another, nobody had the skill to transmit their voice all the way down the mountain. Suddenly a shrill cry filled the entire mountain valley. After a while, Grand Elder Wen’s voice covered Nine Peaks Mountain from all directions, “Hello…hello…can you hear me?”

First Uncle Wen Tunhai replied loudly, “We can hear you just fine!”

The Wen family had installed speakers on the entire mountain to make public announcements.

Grand Elder Wen sat in front of the microphone. As ungenerous as always, he ignored the three sects and announced with a chuckle, “Holy monk Shan Duan, I won’t be descending the mountain, please pardon my rudeness, but please ascend.”

Shan Duan’s voice was pure and honest, full of the magnanimity of an eminent monk, “The elder is too kind. This monk came in a hurry without notice due to the nature of the business, I beg your forgiveness for my boldness.”

The Grand Elder Wen continued to chuckle, “The Nine Peaks Mountain and the Great Mercy Temple are like brethren. If the holy monk is still talking politely, this old man would have nowhere to hide his face.”

Shan Duan was in no hurry as he continued on politely, “It’s this little monk who will have nowhere to hide his face. If you continue to be humble, this monk would have to return to Mount Emei while covering his face, haha, haha.”

Grand Elder Wen replied, “Haha, If you were to return I would bring my household to beg for forgiveness at your doorstep…”

The two of them were politely continuing their conversation which was going nowhere. They were chatting happily, completely leaving the three sects on the sidelines.

Giant Bull jumped out of frustration, huffed and spoke loudly to Wen Leyang, “Why are they talking so much rubbish!?”

Wen Leyang laughed, “Someone else is more frustrated than you!”

…

At the foot of the mountain, the old rabbit demon from the Great Mercy Temple was all smiles, “It has been awfully dry lately, I would very much hope to see rainfall…amitabha, the three heads shall follow this monk…elder Wen, we’re coming up.”

Grand Elder Wen chuckled. He switched the microphone off, and strolled out…

On the patch of ground in front of the Wen village, the Wen Bucao disciples mingled with the rogue cultivators in groups of three, five, seven or eight, all standing in apparent disarray. Beside the four elders of the Wen family were First Uncle Wen Tunhai, Wen Leyang, the two ladies and Ah Dan. The old monk Bu Le disguised himself as a normal old man, standing behind Wen Leyang with a smile while smoking on his pipe.

Other than Wen Buzuo, the people of the Death Trademark were nowhere to be seen.

The Buddhist Great Mercy Temple, secular One Word Palace, Taoist Jilong, Eyang, and Kunlun were collectively called the Five Blessings. They were in charge of the true cultivators of the right path and enjoyed all glory under the heavens for a thousand years. The heads of the Five Blessings were rarely seen, usually spending their time cultivating in the mountains. Even one of the heads coming down the mountain would ignite a great wave of excitement. Now, for the sake of an unpopular name, the Wen Bucao, who were not even true cultivators, four of the Five Blessings’ prominent personas are gathered.

Nobody could tell if this was an auspicious event in the realm of true cultivators, or a great tragedy for the Wen Bucao.

Wen Tunhai had a sturdy build. The wounds on his shoulder had largely healed. He was now standing behind the four elders of the Wen family. Suddenly, a hasty ringtone sounded from his pocket. First Uncle had just picked up the phone and an angry yell could be heard from the other end…

After he ended the call, First Uncle smiled drily at Grand Elder Wen, “Miao Bujiao and the people from Crow’s Ridge are coming. Grand Elder Luo wants to help us in our plight.”

Mumu barely stifled a laugh.

Grand Elder Wen paused for a moment before laughing, “Just as well. Our three families are the descendants of Tuo Xie. To test our might against three of the Five Blessings would be something interesting! Wen Buzuo, raise the Great Flag of our ancestor!”

Wen Buzuo grunted in agreement, gestured behind him. A dozen Wen Bucao disciples combined their strength to erect a huge flagpole. A majestic Great Flag fluttered in the wind, two large words printed squarely on the banner – Tuo Xie!

Wen Leyang let out a laugh, spitting out his half-eaten carrot. Grand Elder Wen looked at him with a proud glint in his eyes, “Boy, isn’t this stylish?”

Wen Leyang was laughing loudly now. He nodded strongly, “It is!”

Grand Elder Wen suddenly lowered his voice, “We started making it just two days ago. In a pinch, it can also be used as a lightning rod.”