My Youth Began With Him

"If you want to die, why don't you smash your head against a wall?" Huo Mian said calmly.

"Because I want to die in your hands…" Huo Siqian smiled warmly as if he didn't think he was saying something cruel.

"You don't just want to die at my hands. You want to make me feel guilty and then torture me emotionally. You want this cruel memory to stand between me and Qin Chu, right?"

Huo Siqian looked up at her in surprise.

"Huo Siqian, aren't you tired after all the things you've done over all these years?"

"Mian…" Each time he said her name, his tone couldn't be more gentle.

"If you're not tired, I must tell you I'm tired… No matter what you had been through, no matter what feelings you have for me, I can tell you there has been nothing between you and me… Even though you think you've loved me for so many years, I can't accept the way you love me. You bring me and my family nothing but severe damage and harm. After so many things happened, you still can't stop… If you really want to die, you can kill yourself by smashing your head against a wall, and no one can stop you. What's your real purpose by making yourself look so pathetic? You did it just to force me to see you? You knew I'd come to see you when I heard about your pathetic state, right?"

"Mian, I just…"

"Shut up. I'm not finished yet. Huo Siqian, you claim that Qin Chu and Su Yu are scheming guys who used all kinds of tricks to win my heart. Is your love so innocent and pure? Don't you think your actions are very scheming? What do you think of this drama? You know very well that I won't kill you, but you said those words just to make me feel bad, right? In other words, even if I killed you, you know I'd feel guilty for the rest of my life. So… with all your tricks, how can you call your love pure and innocent? All these years, no matter what Qin Chu went through, he has never played tricks on me like this. You said you're not scheming, but you make all kinds of plans just to leave deep wounds in my heart… What do you say about that?"

"Mian, I didn't know… you think of me in this way…" Huo Siqian lowered his head as if he was disturbed by her words.

"What do you think then? Do you think I regard you as a saint?" Huo Mian was a bit agitated.

- In the interrogation room outside -

"Chief Gao, shall we end their conversation? I think Mrs. Qin is a bit emotional…"

"Wait a moment." Gao Ran was also worried about Huo Mian; after all, she was pregnant, and if something happened to the baby due to her agitation, Qin Chu would never forgive him.

But on second thought, he knew Huo Mian wasn't an ordinary woman and wouldn't be so fragile, so he decided to wait for a bit more.

"Maybe you're right; maybe I'm not as noble as I claimed. My love for you is selfish… But what then? You said I hurt you, but didn't Qin Chu hurt you too? He vanished for seven years and then forced you to marry him when he returned. Did you forget that? You said I'm scheming, but what about Su Yu? While Qin Chu was abroad, Su Yu stayed with you and your daughters to be their loving father; didn't he do it to get you? They are no better than me; why can't you accept me? Why?" Huo Siqian was getting emotional, and the chains on his wrists clanked as his hands shook, making ear-grating noises in the quiet interrogation room.