My Pick Up Artist System

'I better tell my dad to sell his stock in Mattel…Barbie isn't so hot anymore…' It was another L for Ben.

Sitting at the bar and listening to the DJ needle him with a remix of Radiohead's "I'm a Creep," Ben couldn't avoid hanging a helpless smile. If he couldn't see his weakness before, it was right in front of his face now—he was bad under pressure. The long string of failures tonight proved it.

He did better with the support of his friends and given enough time to adapt to situations, but time wasn't on his side. He was alone, and facing a new challenge. As such, the pitiful result was a series of mistakes and poor judgments. 'I guess it shouldn't surprise me, since I've hidden from pressure my entire life…'

He looked down at his hands, observing the calluses of his loneliness. The ones from gaming away his youth, from running and hiding, from avoiding…everyone…and everything that could hurt him. 'Why do I even keep trying? Maybe I should just go home, take a dump, and go to sleep…'

Ben looked around the room at all the beauties that were dancing with joy, creating a strong contrast to his pathetic state. Most of them already gave him their response—rejection, Ben's old familiar friend. His eyes dimmed. 'Am I stupid to keep struggling like this? …Do I even have a chance of surviving in 4 days? I'm still so far away…What am I even fighting for?' Doubt was creeping in, and he was losing hope.

It was his lowest point when something in the corner of his eye caught his attention. His gaze zoomed in like an eagle. Then…he found his reason to keep living. 'No…I may be stupid…but those titties aren't stupid!'

Ben was staring at the huge rack of a dancing brunette…

It reminded him of a certain similar pair, a pair he titf*cked not long ago…

Then he looked not far from her and noticed something else, a busty blonde with long legs. Those stems reminded him of a pair of s.e.xy legs in brown boots. The ones that were shaking in the air as he brought their owner to climax only a few hours ago.

Ben smiled because he knew he found his second wind. 'Even though things are looking dark…I can't quit. As long as I never give up, there's always a chance…' He chuckled. 'When did I become so hard-headed? If it was me from a month ago, I wouldn't have tried at all, or quit after the first failure…I guess I should credit the noose around my neck…Speaking of which…'

Ben realized every passing second moping was one less second for him to live! 'Even if I end up dying in a few days, I'll be damned if I don't go out swinging...my big ol' shonson! Let's hit a home run!''

He gazed around the room. 'There aren't even see any 2-sets right now…' The closest thing was a group of three women sitting at a table. 'Two obstacles…It may be challenging but I'll try. It'll be a good chance of pace.' He approached.

With confidence, Ben sat down next to the three women. At first, they weren't inviting, but they warmed up to his charm and positive attitude. Ben selected his target and knew he needed something to defuse the other two. 'Something for two of them…' His eyes flashed.

A few moments later, he smashed down a monopoly set in front of them…

Ben spread a confident smirk. "I recommend the doggie…"

***

'Do not pass goo…do not collect one goddamn number…' Ben muttered. Then, he had an epiphany. 'I'm so stupid! Of course I've been failing! I've been treating these a.d.u.l.t women like children…' He slapped his head. With a refreshed sense of confidence, and seeing new women entering the venue, Ben went back on the field.

***

'That's so funny!' The obstacle laughed as she glanced at her friend.

Ben smirked. 'This set's going well. I was a fool before, giving children's toys to a.d.u.l.ts. Now that I know the problem, my confidence is back. Using this fresh start, I should strike while I have her in a good mood.'

The obstacle was still giggling when Ben put something in her hand—a large vibrating purple dildo…

…

'A.d.u.l.t toys for a.d.u.l.t women…' Ben winked at her. "It's got 4 speeds…"

***

'Fresh start my ass!'

[Congratulations! You've unlocked the Achievement: Dildo Dodger(uncommon) - Dodge a flying dildo]

[Distributing reward: PUA Points + 200]

Ben peered around the dancefloor. 'I should try to find that purple vibrator later...If nothing else, I'm sure Beluga would buy it for style points...'

Recalling everything so far tonight, Ben tired of strategizing. 'You know what, f*ck it. I'm just going to hit these women with everything I have left and see what works. I don't care anymore.'

***

One obstacle took a piece of paper from Ben's hand. She read it out loud, "Look for the clues, but don't get stressed. You'll find another where you get dressed..."

Ben hid the scavenger hunt clues all over the bar earlier...

'That should keep her busy a while.' He nodded at her. "Go crazy…"

***

*Pop* *Pop*

First Ben showed how it worked, then he handed it to the new obstacle.

A woman was now holding bubble wrap…

Ben warned her. "Don't hurt yourself…"

***

"What am I supposed to do with this?!?" a different obstacle yelled.

"Use your imagination!" Ben answered.

She was carrying pillows and a sheet to make a pillow fort…

***

One girl followed a trail of rose petals that Ben dropped when he entered the bar…

It led her outside, where the bouncers didn't let her re-enter...

Because Ben smudged the stamp on her hand earlier…

***

Sitting at the bar, Ben was frowning. 'I was so close with that last obstacle. If only she didn't text the target to leave the bar...I forgot about the damn cell phone…It's like they don't exist in key parts of novels or movies…Why do only I have to deal with this?'

About the only positive result he got was this:

[Congratulations! You've unlocked the Achievement: Lure the Tiger from the Mountain(uncommon) - Defuse an obstacle by tricking her to leave the venue]

[Distributing reward: PUA Points + 200]

Something else bothered him. 'I wish I had a space dimension for inventory. How is it the first thing all those MCs get is that, and I had to bring this stupid massive backpack with all this sh*t?'

Ben couldn't stop shaking his head. 'The worst part is…none of it worked! Women are too demanding for ways to pass time these days. When my grandfather was young, his best friends were a rock and a stick…'

While he was ruminating, a hand tapped his shoulder. Ben turned and saw an attractive girl gazing at him. "Are you here alone?"

Ben's eyes became alert. 'She's opening me…Can't make a mistake here...If I say yes, she might think I'm a weak loser…Need to come up with something to look strong…'

He replied, "I'm alone...because I murdered all my friends in a hunger games scenario…"

…

"I just want the barstool..." she said as she left with the stool in a hurry.

Watching her walk away, Ben shouted, "Ha! Jokes on you! I'm a victor! I'll be a celebrity in the Capitol soon!"

…

He turned back and sipped on his ginger ale. 'I need to get my sh*t together…What am I saying? This bad run of losses scrambled my brains...'

Out of nowhere, the music in the club stopped. The DJ put on a new track.

"I find myself in her room~

Feel the fever of my doom~

Falling falling through the floor~

I'm knocking on the devil's door yeah!"

It was the theme song of From Dusk Till Dawn. While it played, Ben noticed everyone in the room was gazing in one direction, at the staircase, where his eyes shifted to as well…

There…stood the s.e.xiest woman Ben had ever seen.

[Dungeon boss detected]

[Dungeon boss hidden bloodline detected: Trace of Succubus]