Kill the Sun
48 Chapter 48 – Contemplation
In the Containment Unit, Nick simply sat on the ground, unmoving.
He didn't say anything.
'I'm so sorry, Horua.'
Nick didn't move.
'I'm sorry!'
'I should have known that things wouldn't be so easy!'
'Even though the Dreamer is not very scary for a Specter, it is still a Specter!'
'And you're a kid!'
'How could I ever think that a child would be able to work with a Specter?!'
'I'm stupid!'
'I'm fucking retarded!'
'I'm so sorry!'
'I was the one that fucked up, and now you have to pay the price!'
'This is all my fault, Horua!'
Nick's limbs shook in frustration, guilt, and rage.
'I feel so horrible.'
'Please, Horua, when you wake up, don't do anything stupid.'
'You can hate me.'
'You can ignore me.'
'You can try to ruin me.'
'I'm fine with everything.'
'But please, don't try to ruin the business or Wyntor.'
'Because if you do that, you will die!'
As Nick continued to think about everything, his own reality also finally set in.
'Actually, I think I'm in a similar position to Horua.'
'Wyntor made me his Chief Zephyx Extractor.'
'If I were to betray him, I would also be killed off.'
Nick's fists clenched.
'Wyntor is a cold and calculating businessman. He eliminates everyone that goes against him.'
'If I were to tell anyone anything confidential, I would be dead within the day.'
Slowly, rage and fear also joined Nick's emotions.
'Wyntor!'
'I know that this is my responsibility, but you knew that this would happen!'
'You might have even wanted this to happen!'
'After all, you said that you wanted me to learn!'
Nick gritted his teeth in anger.
But then, a scene appeared in Nick's mind.
The scene depicted Wyntor standing behind Nick as he blinded the Dreamer.
In that scene, Wyntor was completely drenched in sewer water.
Nick remembered how difficult it had been for Wyntor to jump in, and he also remembered how much Wyntor had suffered after he had left the sewer again.
'He only did that because he wanted to catch the Dreamer!' Nick thought with hatred.
Yet, the more time passed, the more Nick felt like he didn't truly believe that.
Did Wyntor truly only do this because of the Dreamer?
'Actually, probably not.'
'It wasn't certain that I would die.'
'There was a good chance that I would manage to swim towards the entrance of the sewers, where Wyntor was standing.'
'Then, Wyntor would have been able to help me without jumping into the sewers.'
There had been a good thirty meters between the place where Nick had been and the entrance of the sewers.
For Wyntor to swim that far, he must have jumped into the sewers nearly half a minute before he had arrived at Nick's side.
Nick put his hands on his knees and violently grabbed them in frustration.
'He's not cold,' Nick thought.
'He might appear cold now, but people only show their true faces when they are in a stressful or dangerous situation.'
'When it was important, Wyntor was willing to jump into the sewers to save me. It might have also been in his own best interest, but it still must have been very difficult.'
'Right now, he's only cold because he needs to be.'
'This is his job.'
'Like he said, deciding to kill Horua probably also heavily weighs on his mind.'
'And yet, he still talked normally with me, and he didn't say anything out of line.'
'I fucked up, and Wyntor has to suffer because of it.'
'But he only reprimanded me.'
'Horua suffers because of me.'
'Wyntor suffers because of me.'
'If things go badly, even Pator will suffer because of me.'
'I was the one that made the decision to get Horua.'
'Wyntor warned me, but I didn't listen.'
'This is all because of me.'
At this moment, most of Nick's emotions vanished, replaced by only two emotions.
Guilt and determination.
'This is my fault.'
'And it is my job to rectify these issues.'
'No matter what I have to do or what it will cost!'
Nick looked forward again.
The Dreamer was still standing beside the sleeping Horua.
At this moment, Horua looked like he was peacefully sleeping.
'It's not that bad, Horua. You will just have some bad dreams and wake up.'
'It won't be as bad as you imagined it to be.'
'And when you wake up, you will officially be a Zephyx Extractor.'
'You will have an actual future, and you will gain powerful abilities.'
'I know things will only improve for you.'
'Sadly, I won't be part of that future.'
'I know you hate me.'
Nick took a shaky breath.
'And I'm fine with it.'
'That's the price I must pay.'
'I don't deserve forgiveness for what I've done.'
Nick just continued looking at Horua.
The memories of what Nick had done to Horua became hazier and hazier.
It was almost like all of this hadn't happened.
It was like nothing had changed.
Yet, whenever Nick looked at Horua and the Dreamer, he was reminded of reality.
It had happened.
But it didn't feel like it had happened.
After a while, Nick put his head in his hands again.
Silence.
Nick didn't move.
Time passed.
Nick had plenty of time and opportunity to think about what he had done.
In this Containment Unit, there was nothing for Nick to do.
And he had to remain here for eight hours.
Paradoxically, it felt like the longest and the shortest eight hours of Nick's life.
On one hand, Nick felt like time was dragging on forever, but on the other hand, Nick despaired at the rapid passage of time.
He didn't want to see how Horua would react when he woke up.
It was torture.
However, it wouldn't be eight hours until things changed.
After just five hours, something happened.
Crk! Crk!
Nick heard something and looked over.
He saw the Dreamer take a couple of steps back as it retreated back into its corner.
For just a moment, Nick was confused.
But the next moment, Horua's body suddenly started to shake violently.
Nick's eyes widened.
'He's having a seizure!'
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