I'm Actually a Cultivation Bigshot

“How did you get your hands on an angel? Did she cause any offense to you?” asked Li Nianfan.

“Not really. It’s just that she looks a little different from us so I brought her back to show you. And besides, she can join the zoo,” said Nanan. Then, she paused before asking, “By the way, can we eat her?”

‘Eat her? Join the zoo?’ Li Nianfan was a little speechless. ‘How did a little girl like her get so twisted? Her first thought when meeting an angel was to find out whether she’s edible? What’s more, who’ll come to our zoo? Then again, this angel really is gorgeous, almost as gorgeous as Little Daji.’

Li Nianfan coughed lightly and said, “No, we cannot eat the angel.”

An angel that looked like a human. There would be no turning back if they ate her. Li Nianfan’s gaze landed on the angel’s wings. ‘It looks really fancy. I wonder what it feels like?’ He really wanted to find out, so he courteously asked the angel, “Can I touch your wings?”

War Angel struggled against the ropes violently and her blue eyes glared vehemently at Li Nianfan. It was a hard no.

Li Nianfan smiled and said, “Since you didn’t say no, please, excuse me.” He touched her wings. ‘Wow, it’s so soft and smooth! And warm, too!’ The feeling was similar to Little Fox’s fur. He was a little saddened that he could not stroke Little Fox’s fur now that she had transformed into her human form.

However, there was a slight difference between the angel’s wings and Little Fox’s fur. The former was soft to the touch but very hard underneath while the latter was finer and its texture harmonized with the softness of the body. Each had its weaknesses and strengths but both were very comforting to touch.

‘I can’t believe I’m touching a beautiful angel’s wings right now. I definitely won the lottery of life!’ The smile never left his face. “Wow, this angel’s wings are so comfortable! I can’t get enough of it!”

War Angel was trembling and her face was flushed red. She was beyond frustrated. She would have ripped Li Nianfan into pieces if it was not for the rope that was binding her. Although she could tell that the rest of the people seemed to hold him in high regard, to her, he was a useless mortal who was no match for her.

With difficulty, she used every strength in her body to say, “Take…your…dirty hands…off me!” Their wings were an angel’s pride, a symbol of their uniqueness. Their wings were considered more precious than their lives and she would kill anyone who dared to treat her wings with disrespect. War Angel’s eyes were completely red as she glared at Li Nianfan.

“Sorry,” said Li Nianfan as he reluctantly withdrew his hand. ‘It’s a shame I can’t touch the wings as much as I want but I should respect her wishes.’

“Brother Li, I’ll kill this angel for disrespecting you!” said Nanan angrily.

Li Nianfan patted her head. “No. She didn’t do anything to me. We cannot bully the weak,” he said with a bitter smile. ‘This kid’s obsessed with killing and has no empathy for others!’

Li Nianfan was at a loss at what to do with the angel. If he let her go, she would surely seek revenge but he could not bear to kill an angel that did nothing to him. ‘Oh well, might as well keep her here as a pet.’

Li Nianfan was happy with his decision and he continued to make his rounds around the zoo while evaluating the game meat.

“Oh, the chickens and peacock are in for a treat! I can make these ice silkworms into chicken feed. I bet that would make their eggs more nutritious.” It worked when he fed them some locusts, so he made a mental note to include more bugs in their diet.

“What species is this hippo from? It looks kinda weird,” said Li Nianfan when he came across a demon. His eyes shone brightly. “I’ve never eaten hippo meat before. Come, let’s drag him into the yard and we’ll have it for dinner!”

The hippo’s eyes opened wide in terror and it started wailing. ‘Sh*t, so much game meat here, and he chose me? What rotten luck!’

The other game meat watched it being dragged away and their eyes were filled with both sorrow and happiness. ‘Farewell, Brother Hippo! It’s so sad to think that we’ve all ended up as someone’s game meat.’

War Angel was shocked when she saw what happened. ‘No wonder that little girl asked me if she could eat me. It looks like everyone who ends up here would be eaten sooner or later. Who is that man? They seriously brought us here just to feed him? Is he really that strong?’ There were too many questions in her mind. However, before she could figure the whole thing out, Nanan, a bald dog, and the others had already closed in on her.

The bald dog was holding a big stick in his mouth. The stick had bumps all over it, making it look very disgusting.

War Angel frowned and trembled. “What… What are you going to do to me? Didn’t that guy just say I’m not edible?” she asked in a scared voice.

Dragin smiled and said, “Don’t worry. We won’t kill you because Brother Li explicitly told us not to.”

“Then, what are you going to do to me?” asked War Angel weakly. She was still anxious.

Nanan looked at Blackie and asked curiously, “Blackie, why did you ask us to come here?”

Blackie put down the stick and said proudly, “Amongst us all, I’m the one who knows Master the best! Didn’t you see the Master’s reaction just now? He really liked stroking the angel’s feathers, so as his pet, it’s my duty to share his burden.”

Everyone’s eyes lit up when they heard that.

“He’s right! Why didn’t I think of it? We can pluck her feathers and give it to Brother Li!”

“The Master did say that the angel wings were really good.”

“You’re so smart, Blackie!”

They were all looking at War Angel’s wings with a dangerous glint in their eyes.

“Of course,” said Blackie with a smile. His smile became even wider when he looked at War Angel. ‘Hahaha! I won’t be the only bald one around here for much longer!’

“What are we waiting for? Pluck ’em feathers!” said Nanan eagerly.

“Chill. I’ve come prepared. We can use this!” Blackie pointed at the big stick. “The Master uses this to get rid of the hair on the game meat. It’s convenient, fast, and does the job cleanly.”

Nanan and Dragin nodded and said excitedly, “Oh! I’ve seen Brother Li use it before!”

‘Pluck my feathers?’ All the colors drained out of War Angel’s face. She started to tremble when she saw the big stick. “No, please. I beg of you! Don’t do it.”

Nanan picked up the big stick and said, “This is huge! I hope you can endure the pain.” Then, she stretched the big stick toward War Angel.

“No! No!” The usually arrogant War Angel was sobbing hysterically as she struggled weakly and helplessly.

“There, there. It’ll all be over soon!” said Dragin soothingly.

“You’re not humans! Stop! No! Ahh—!”

After two or three minutes, War Angel was sobbing weakly on the ground. She was traumatized and wished for death to claim her. Her tears came down like torrential rain and her eyes were so puffy that she could barely see Dragin and the others walking toward the four-part architecture with her feathers in their hands. She curled up and continued sobbing, all alone.

Meanwhile, back at the four-part architecture, the Hippo Demon had been slaughtered and was being cleaned by Li Nianfan and Xiao Bai. It would take them a while to thoroughly clean its huge body.

“The meat of this hippopotamus is quite firm. There’s a large chunk of lean meat, too. It should be delicious. I wonder how I should cook it,” said Li Nianfan.

Suddenly, Nanan and the others ran over to him with excited, red faces. He quickly noticed the big bunch of feathers in their hands. Each feather was beautiful, its length a little longer than the average hand. It was even glowing lightly.

‘Huh? Those feathers look familiar. Aren’t they the feathers of the angel?’ His eyes grew wide open and he quickly asked, “Are…are those the angel’s feathers?”

“Yup! We saw how much you liked them so we decided to pluck them for you, Brother Li!” said Nanan proudly.

Li Nianfan smacked his own forehead. He could not believe what they had done. “How’s the angel?” he asked.

“Don’t worry, Brother Li. She’s fine. We didn’t do anything to her,” said Dragin.

‘Except for plucking her feathers!’ thought Li Nianfan. He smacked the back of their heads and quickly walked out of the four-part architecture.

He did not immediately walk over to the angel but looked at her from a distance away. He saw her all curled up and sobbing. Her wings were like the skin of a siamese cat now that all her feathers were removed. She folded the wings over herself as if wanting to hide from the world. Her wings were as white as her skin so it did not look too bad.

‘She must be traumatized,’ thought Li Nianfan. He was filled with sympathy and guilt. He went back to the four-part architecture, sighed, and said, “What’s done is done. I need to quickly come up with an idea to make it better for her.”

His gaze landed on the bunch of feathers. He picked them up. They were still warm to the touch. ‘I can make a very comfortable blanket out of these,’ thought Li Nianfan. Then, he shook his head. ‘No, that won’t do. There aren’t enough feathers for that.’

Mat, throw blanket, duvet, table mat… How many angel feathers would it take to make more than one set? No, no. He could not be so wasteful.

“Just say the word and I’ll go get more feathers for you, Brother Li!” volunteered Nanan.

Li Nianfan smacked her head and reprimanded her, “Violence isn’t the answer to everything. We aren’t bandits. Remember this, don’t cross others if they haven’t crossed you! Understand?”

He was worried that they would become even more twisted as time passed. The more powerful one was, the more important one’s morals were. They could very well end up as real bandits if he did not teach them a lesson. Then, they would have become the bad guys instead of the good guys.

Nanan pouted and said, “Yes, Brother Li.”

“To prevent you all from taking the wrong path, each of you must write ‘Di Zi Gui’ a hundred times!” said Li Nianfan. This was the only idea he could come up with since he could not overpower them with brute strength. He did it for their own good and his own safety.

“Brother Li, what’s ‘Di Zi Gui?” asked Dragin curiously.

“It’s a book. I’ll go get it for you now,” said Li Nianfan. He went into the utility room and found a blue book after some digging around. On the cover of the book, three words were written on it, ‘Di Zi Gui’.

When they saw the book, they felt the Wisdom in their bodies surge wildly as an inexplicable pressure came crashing down on them. It was as if a terrifying rule was going to bind their Wisdom. However, when they delved deeper into the pressure, they discovered that it was nowhere to be found or seen. It was as if it never existed.

Li Nianfan passed the book to Dragin and said, “Try to memorize it in your heart while copying it.”

Dragin nodded obediently. She could feel the inexplicable pressure getting stronger when she held the book in her hand. However, she had absolute trust in Li Nianfan and without hesitation, she flipped open the book.

“These are the rules for being a student, handed down to us by Ancient Sages.

First, be filial to your own parents and respectful to all of your elders.

Be trustworthy, cautious, and kind, and draw near to those who are good.

Whatever time you have left should be devoted to learning.

When your mother or father is calling, don’t be slow to respond.

When your parents tell you to do something, don’t be lazy or sulky…”

Light began to flow out from the book and the words washed over everyone like a tidal wave. Instantly, the laws of the universe dissipated and Wisdom laid dormant. Even the mana in their bodies calmed down as their Wisdom was suppressed.

Nanan, Shi Tuqin, Qin Manyun, Little Daji, Fire Phoenix, and Little Fox all gathered around Dragin to read ‘Di Zi Gui’. They could hear the words being read. It was not the sound of Wisdom but the sound of rules, and they felt as if they were being bound by chains.

At that moment, they understood that the inexplicable pressure they felt earlier did not come from the outside world but from within themselves. They were their own worst enemy. It was not enough to reach enlightenment but it was just as equally important to remain equanimous in life.

If one’s heart was not steady, it would be easy to lose one’s self on the path of cultivation. They would be no different than the Eldritchs if all they did was pursue higher realms without thinking of the consequences it would bring others.