I'm A Baller

Wang Ergou picked up his hoe and rushed to the village entrance.

In the small plaza in front of the village where copper coins, silver coins, and gold coins were displayed, there was a large number of ferocious and domineering looking horses.

The horses had eight limbs and two giant claws. Its two big eyes were very sharp.

The soldiers looked majestic too. In their left hand, they were holding a divine object that kept showing all sorts of images. In their right hand, they were holding a board that was filled with small squares. From time to time, they would press it a few times, and it would make a terrifying crackling sound.

On the back of the largest horse was a middle-aged fat man. Behind him were two maids. One was massaging his shoulders, while the other was feeding him wine.

Wang Ergou was furious when he saw this.

Why did they have to wait for the Oracle, while this man enjoyed life like that!

When the fat man saw the soldiers drive the villagers out, he raised his eyelids, he raised his voice from above and said, “I am Wang Jianhao, the tax minister of the Empire’s ocean department. The Princess’ birthday is coming, and the whole country is celebrating. You all have to hand over 70% of this year’s harvest to celebrate the Princess’ birthday!”

As soon as he said this, the people before him were at a loss.

Village chief, Wang Yunxi, mustered up his courage and asked, “Sir, why did the ocean department come to the mountain to collect taxes?”

Wang Jianhao was extremely arrogant. He snorted coldly. “It’s an IQ tax! We’ll collect it by the head!”

Er Ya asked angrily, “Humph! And what happens if we don’t pay?”

Wang Jianhao looked at Er Ya and waved his hand with a sneer. “Men! Get her to sign a contract, then send her to Waiwai to be a livestreamer!”

Er Ya cried and struggled for a while, but in the end, she couldn’t resist the powerful soldiers who were shouting, “Once we’re done we can go home” and “fuck you”. She was forced to use her handprint to sign a contract.

Swoosh!

A kitchen knife suddenly flew out from the sky and went straight for Wang Jianhao’s neck.

The kitchen knife was as fast as lightning, but before it reached Wang Jianhao, it was smashed into pieces by the claw of the horse.

Wang Jianhao’s expression did not flinch. He glanced at the girl who threw the kitchen knife and waved his hand.

“Assaulting the Empire’s commander-in-chief is an grave crime! Arrest her and send her to Beauty Tears to be a model!”

“How dare you!”

Er Ya’s father rushed forward with a howl. His immense strength knocked the soldiers into a heap.

However, Wang Jianhao recited two incantations silently. The word “Water” suddenly descended from the sky and froze Er Ya’s father on the spot.

“You’re overestimating yourself!”

With a disdainful snort, the fat man pondered for a moment and finally decided to make a judgment.

“Hurting the navy of the ocean department is a heinous crime! I’ll send him to Qidian and sentence him to write a webnovel!”

After all these people were taken away, the villagers had been dealt a heavy blow and were trembling in fear.

Although they did not know what kind of terrible punishment being a livestreamer, a model or a webnovel author was, they knew that it was definitely extremely terrifying.

Wang Jianhao glanced at the trembling villagers and laughed maniacally as he gloated.

“I’ll see who else dares to refuse!”

Wang Ergou was extremely angry. He started to gather his energies together and intended to kill this evil officer for the sake of the people.

However, at this moment, an ugly and sneaky looking man suddenly rushed out of the line, knelt down and started kowtowing like crazy.

“My Lord, my Lord, my Lord!”

The navy was about to take that man down, but Wang Jianhao waved his hand and said, “Let him speak.”

The man raised his head and raised his complaint with bloodshot eyes.

“Your Excellency, we, the peasants in the mountains, are stupid and ignorant. We worked hard to plant crops, but we only got barely five hundred copper coins, which is not enough to even feed our family. Even if you take all of it, it won’t add up to much. But that man over there is different!”

The man suddenly pointed at Wang Ergou in the crowd, gritting his teeth and shouting hysterically.

“We never see him working hard, but when his crops grow, they are all gold! You just need to bring him back to the city and offer him to the princess, and there will be an endless supply of gold. Isn’t it better than taking a few copper coins from us?”

Village chief Wang Yunxi was so angry that he beat his chest and stomped his feet.

“Hey! We live in the same village, and we are both farmers. How can you do this? Even if Ergou is taken away, you can’t grow gold, so why do you have to be the bad guy?!”

The man’s eyes became redder and redder, and there was no shame in them. He raised his arms and shouted.

“Why can we only grow copper coins after all our hard work, but Ergou can easily grow gold?”

“He refused to say anything even after I asked him, and said bullshit about having to work hard to cultivate them. I asked him if I could try one gold coin and he looked at me disdainfully…”

“Anyway, I’ve disliked him for a long time!”

“If Ergou’s gone, we would all have a few more acres of land. Even if we couldn’t grow gold, it would still be good to grow more copper coins. Don’t you think that’s a good reason?”

“That’s right!”

Some of the villagers came to a sudden realization and stood up to provide evidence. “Sir, Ergou really knows how to grow gold!”

“I hide in the grass and watch him every day. He often breaks the rules by chanting some driving spells!”

“Yes, yes, there’s a big tree on the hill called a Pirate. I often hide up there to peek. Occasionally, I notice something strange, so I come down to pick one and taste it. It’s really not right!”

Wang Ergou was suddenly backstabbed by his fellow villagers. He was so angry that he pulled back all the energies he gathered into himself, spitting a mouthful of blood and becoming immobile.

“There’s actually such a strange thing?!”

Wang Jianhao was overjoyed and waved his hand.

“Come on, get that kid for me! Be careful, don’t hurt him!”

Wang Ergou raised his arm and wanted to fight, but he found that he couldn’t muster the strength to do so. His heart instantly sank.

“Ergou!”

Er Ya saw Ergou’s miserable state and wailed miserably. She struggled with all her strength, but the soldier beside her casually hit her on the head with a weapon. Blood flowed out of her forehead and she fainted.

Wang Ergou’s eyes were about to pop out of their sockets. He stared at the soldier and swore through gritted teeth, “You little rat, I will kill you!”

The soldier laughed maniacally. “That’s not my name. I’m Zhu Jike, and I’ll be waiting for you to kill me!”

…

The flower fields were destroyed and the crops were harvested. Wang Ergou and the rest were imprisoned in the prison cart. They left the mountain village at noon.

The usually terrifying black fog seemed to cower in fear in the face of this group of eight-clawed monsters.

There seemed to be something stirring in the black fog, exuding an extremely terrifying aura.

Wang Jianhao, however, did not panic at all. He cupped his hands and bowed.

“Under the Imperial Princess’ orders, we have never failed to offer enough to you. Please leave now!”

A moment later, the rustling sound gradually faded away, and the road became quiet.

Er Ya’s father turned pale with fright. “Offerings are actually so useful?”

Wang Jianhao turned his head in disdain. “Do you think that everyone is able to sacrifice a godly beast? You lowly people, just work and save your money!”

Wang Ergou paid no attention to the people around him. He gently wiped the blood stains off Er Ya’s forehead, looked at it carefully for a moment, and heaved a sigh of relief.

“It’s not a serious injury. The wound has already healed, and there are only three white lines left on her skin.”

Er Ya opened her blue eyes and asked lovingly, “Ergou, when are you going to have a baby with me? !”

“Humph!” Da Ya snorted coldly and turned her head away. Her heart wouldn’t be bothered with what it couldn’t see.

…

The gigantic horse looked clumsy, but it was actually extremely fast. It didn’t take long to enter a large city.

Wang Ergou was very curious about what the capital city looked like. He tried his best to open his eyes wide, but he couldn’t see anything clearly.

He only felt like he was in a dream and there was a bright light everywhere.

Before long, a grand palace appeared in front of him.

The palace was built along the mountain. There was a statue standing on the peak of the mountain. Its head was hidden in the clouds, so its appearance could not be seen clearly.

For some reason, the closer he was to the statue, the more agitated Ergou felt. There was an emotion that was about to burst out.

However, after entering the palace, that emotion quickly disappeared. Instead, it was replaced by a burning curiosity.

Beautiful clothing greeted everyone at the door one after another.

Food and fruit with all kinds of aromas ran around.

A group of finger-sized elves chased after them and cleaned up.

Random animals sang random songs.

Fountains of wine gushed up to the ceiling and flowed freely above everyone’s heads without dripping.

There was no throne in the palace. In the center stood a huge mirror.

Facing the mirror, Wang Ergou and the others did not see themselves. Instead, they saw a girl slowly walking over.

She wore a crown on her head and was covered in a multicolored glow. Her black hair cascaded like a waterfall, and her eyes were as bright as the stars.

Wang Ergou went into a daze.

God Crab, he suddenly felt like having a baby…

“Welcome, Your Highness!” Wang Jianhao knelt on the ground and shouted fervently.

“Get up!”

The princess stopped in front of the mirror and curiously looked at the four people who were brought in.

“Are they criminals?”

“Well, the other three are. That young man is a gift that I have prepared for you!”

The princess seemed to be very interested.

“What can he do?”

“He can easily grow gold!”

The princess could not help but laugh. “I’m rich enough to buy a country, and I don’t lack gold… Alright, stay here to relieve my boredom then!”

“No way!”

Da Ya and Er Ya raised their objections at the same time. “Return Ergou to us!”

The princess glanced at them and suddenly said, “I don’t like them. Send them away to the disgraced families in the city to be their sons’ wives. Don’t let them appear in front of me again.”

After hearing this, the faces of the two girls turned pale. They suddenly felt a surge of strength within their bodies and broke free of their shackles before rushing out of the palace.

The soldiers were thrashed badly as they watched the two girls fight their way out of the encirclement.

“Ergou, wait for me. I will definitely save you!”

A determined sounding oath came from afar. Wang Ergou was dumbfounded.

The two girls were so powerful, so why didn’t they take him away right there and then?

Was it because they knew they were no match for the princess, so they ran for it first?

Time passed quickly. In the blink of an eye, half a year had passed.

Wang Ergou had no idea what strange thing had happened. All in all, he had inexplicably become the prince consort and was about to marry the princess.

“Ergou, Ergou, look, isn’t this wedding dress beautiful?”

Wang Ergou looked up and said lazily, “It’s beautiful…”

At this moment, Wang Ergou was completely different from when he first arrived.

His weight had increased by 150 kilograms, and he was wearing gold and silver. He was lying on a gorgeous bed and could get anything he wanted just by saying the word.

The princess suddenly looked shy. “After the wedding, we can pass on your bloodline…”

Wang Ergou raised his head and looked down. Sadly, he only saw a big belly.

“Sigh! It’ll be hard on you. I have the heart but not the strength…”

“It’s okay, I can do it!”

The princess nodded excitedly and looked eager.

Just when they were having a tender moment, a dumpling suddenly rolled through the door. The dumpling skin opened and closed as it said, “Bad news, Your Highness! All the nearby empires have declared war on us!”

The princess slammed the table and stood up. “Why?!”

“The Legend of the Prince Consort has already spread all over the world. They are here to snatch the Prince Consort! Furthermore, the rebel army of livestreamers and models led by Da Ya and Er Ya are rapidly approaching the Capital!”

The princess was unexpectedly calm and a murderous air boiled within her.

“Order General Gong to lead the army to quell the rebellion! As for those who came to attack us… they’ve come at a good time! Just in time for me to catch them all in one fell swoop!”

“Sigh, why are you doing this?” Wang Ergou struggled to sit up and sighed in frustration.

“A beauty like me will only bring you endless trouble and you will never have peace. Why don’t you hand me over to the rebel army and let me die at their hands!”

“Never have peace?!”

The princess looked at Wang Ergou suspiciously and frowned tightly.

After pondering for a while, she suddenly asked, “Do you think that the palace is too quiet? You prefer noisy places?”

“Huh?!” Wang Ergou was stunned and smiled awkwardly. “I’m fine either way…”

“I’m not!”

The princess threw away her wedding dress and a set of armor appeared on her body. She carried a big golden hammer and said domineeringly, “You can only belong to me. Let bygones be bygones. No one is allowed to touch you in the future! Anyone who touches you shall get their legs broken!”

Wang Ergou shrank back and argued back quietly, “I planted half of the national treasury…”

“I remember how many you planted! I only want you, not your coins!”

This conversation was impossible.

Wang Ergou laid back lazily and raised his empty wine glass. A wisp of fine wine immediately fell from the ceiling and filled the glass.

After drinking two glasses of wine, he was slightly tipsy. There was a rumble outside.

Wang Ergou sighed in frustration.

Sigh!

Why was he so useless?

This shouldn’t be happening.

He was clearly the descendant of a brave person and had the bloodline of the Sun..

Why do he feel like he was being suppressed so much?

“Because in reality, your aggressiveness and belligerence levels are too strong. So in the dream, you’re more willing to be lazy and watch everything happen.”

Wait, who was that?!

Wang Ergou was shocked and bounced up like a ball.

“Come to the back of the mountain.”

But who was that?!

The voice disappeared, but he felt a calling from within his heart.

Fine, he would go there to have a look.

He came to the back of the mountain slowly and climbed up hundreds of steps. In front of him was a towering statue that reached into the clouds.

When he looked up, he couldn’t even see the waist of the statue. But for some reason, Wang Ergou felt that the statue was looking down at him.

There was a door at the foot of the statue. Gritting his teeth, Wang Ergou stepped into the statue.

Boom!

In an instant, Wang Ergou’s soul was extracted and he quickly rose up. In the blink of an eye, he reached the head of the statue and looked down at the strange continent from a wonderful perspective.

In the south, the female army led by Da Ya and Er Ya was fighting against the navy of the ocean department.

In the east, there were four flags that read Ling, Mi, Gang and Dai. The four divine generals were constantly attacking. Everywhere they passed, there were people who surrendered and people who rebelled. It was a mess.

In the west, black fog filled the air and yin signals were formed. They were constantly invading the empire’s hinterland.

In the central region, there were countless forces, big and small, surrounding the flower fields and beating everyone in their way.

He looked a little closer. Hey, those fields were the ones that Wang Ergou had casually planted in the past!

In the north, the two armies were facing each other.

The princess was holding a ridiculous looking Golden Warhammer while the general opposite her was a tiny man who was baring his fangs and brandishing his claws. His fiery red long hair floated in the air like a burning flame.

“Who are you?!”

“I am the Silver Spear of the White Horse, Lin Pingzhi!”

Wang Ergou found it inexplicably funny, but he had a vague feeling that something was missing.

What was missing?!

As if he sensed something, Ergou suddenly raised his head and looked at the sky.

The galaxy was brilliant, and there were a few shadows floating in the starlight.

Just as he was about to analyze it carefully, he suddenly heard a loud bell.

“Since you don’t want to participate, we don’t have to continue the dream!”

“Let’s go!”

A whistling sound pulled Wang Yan back to reality.

Phew!

Wang Yan suddenly sat up and panted heavily. After a long while, he suddenly couldn’t help but laugh wildly.

Hahaha… hahahahaha!

This senseless dream had been really funny!

Under [Note 1] of the card, it was clearly written —

“On that day, you will definitely pull a member of the opposite sex into the dream. Both of your consciousnesses will interfere and modify the dream together.”

But in reality?!

A total of at least seven members of the opposite sex had been pulled into the broken dream!

Wang Yan couldn’t even tell who had been pulled into the dream and who was just a projection of his consciousness.

What a fucking mess!

So strictly speaking, this wasn’t his dream at all, but a dream shared by all of them?!

No wonder he was so muddle-headed in there, acting as a bystander…

He wondered what this dream was really like to them…

Wang Yan was extremely curious, and a thousand and one questions echoed in his head. He wished he could immediately ask someone about it.

Er Ya was Na Wu. She hadn’t run away, so was she in the dream or not?

The princess looked very much like He Miaomiao, but not quite either. She had fainted!

Lin Weiwei… hahahahaha!

Wang Yan laughed hysterically and immediately picked up her phone to send her a WeChat message.

“Silver Spear of the White Horse! Lin Pingzhi! Love you! You were so cool!”

After flirting with her, he threw her phone aside and fell into endless confusion again.

This senseless dream was the joint effort of everyone’s dreams, so there must be some revelation.

But what exactly did it mean?

How should one understand it?!

The superficial representation was the fight for money and benefits. Although Wang Ergou didn’t have much sense of existence, he was the core of the entire dream.

This had something to do with Wang Yan’s inflated narcissism.

But the deeper meaning was the reflection of everyone’s subconscious. It could actually make the dream maintain a general balance and logic.

This was too amazing.

Simply amazing…

Wang Yan was puzzled. He suddenly thought of how he had weighed an additional 150 kilograms and could not help but laugh.

“Forget it, I don’t want to think too much about it. Let’s see what reward I can get!”

He turned his gaze to the system panel. There were a few lines of large golden words floating in it.

[You, who was just a bystander, looked incompetent, but in fact, it means that no one can figure you out.]

[In this rare combined dream, only your image was created by everyone together.]

[You became a clay puppet, and was suppressed throughout. You were even kicked out early because your image had an intense conflict in everyone’s subconscious.]

[Therefore, you receive a special strengthening.]

[Temperament fragment — Ethereal Wind.]