If You Don't Fall In Love, You'll Die

Editor: Amaris

Ye Chen liked Gu Xi.

Let alone confessing, Yu Xingzhe simply went back to Paris directly while feeling dejected. He felt like crying all the way back, but he couldn't.

He didn't eat his meals, couldn't sleep soundly, and shut himself in a small room, ignoring everyone.

Seeing Yu Xingzhe like this, SUN was so distressed that he also became a complete mess.

Back in country F, Yu Xingzhe eventually walked out of the shadow of love disappointment after being ladened with grief for three days.

In these three days, Yu Xingzhe said something which made SUN extremely happy.

He said, "SUN, I'm glad I still have you. I'm so lucky to be able to meet you."

SUN hadn't had his heart beating this fast for a long time already. He knew what Yu Xingzhe meant, but felt delighted regardless.

SUN grinned as he responded to Yu Xingzhe inside his heart: It's also my luck to be able to meet you.

These few years had been going on joyfully for the two of them. Every single day was filled with sunshine and happiness, which made them feel at ease mentally and physically.

In the next two years, Yu Xingzhe seemed to be afraid of love, which was why he didn't get involved with it anymore. He didn't date anyone and didn't think of Ye Chen anymore.

Yu Xingzhe and SUN were inseparable like shadows. His career also grew bigger and bigger and it greatly boosted his reputation. Yu Xingzhe became more used to his current life, too.

When he was about 26 or 27, Yu Xingzhe had achieved professional success, which had left countless people astonished.

He felt that his life was going pretty well, he was perfectly content to live like this for a lifetime.

Therefore, why would he need to fall in love? Having SUN by his side was more than enough for him.

But then… SUN resigned.

Yu Xingzhe was a typical tsundere. In the past, the two got along pretty well, but SUN didn't blindly indulge him. He simply did whatever was useful for Yu Xingzhe and didn't allow Yu Xingzhe to do anything that would harm him.

Yu Xingzhe sometimes lost his temper and yelled that he would fire SUN. But of course, SUN only treated it as him throwing a tantrum.

But now… SUN had really left. Yu Xingzhe felt like he had lost half of his life.

Then, he went to find Ye Chen. Ye Chen called SUN, and SUN revealed…that he had always liked Yu Xingzhe. He didn't want them to end up bickering and made things more troublesome, so he resigned.

Hearing SUN's explanations, Yu Xingzhe could feel the blood in his entire body flowing backwards.

Yu Xingzhe couldn't explain what he was feeling.

L…like?

SUN liked him? The kind of like where he wanted them to be lovers?

Yu Xingzhe felt a buzz on his head. He couldn't figure out what he (himself) was thinking.

He wasn't aware of it when they were together every day, but now that they had been separated, Yu Xingzhe only got to realize what losing SUN meant to him.

Yu Xingzhe didn’t go back to Paris. He stayed at his own familiar home and ate the dishes made by Old Chen.

But… This isn't right. Nothing feels right.

For eighteen years of his life, Yu Xingzhe had undoubtedly always felt that home was the most cozy, suitable, and relaxing place for him.

But now&#k2026; Everywhere felt uncomfortable, everywhere felt strange to him, everywhere felt&#k2026;

He constantly tried to get SUN out of his mind, because if he didn't, he'd keep imagining that if SUN was here, things would certainly go like this and that…

Habits were truly a dreadful thing. Yu Xingzhe was at a complete loss because of the sudden change.

Yu Xingzhe noticed that he felt much worse right now compared to six years ago.

When he went to Paris at that time, days went through as he felt uncomfortable all over. Everything felt unpleasant for him.

But now, instead of feeling unpleasant, he felt…so filled with grief as to wish he was dead.

I mustn't be this vulnerable.

Yu Xingzhe told himself that he must get used to it. It was impossible for SUN to stay with him forever, he must get used to the days after losing SUN.

But soon, an absurd idea came to his mind.

Why can't we be together forever?

Aren't Ye Chen and Ren Jing going to be together forever?

He—

Yu Xingzhe wildly shook his head and tried his best to discard that idea.

No… It's not like that!

Half a year passed in a blur for Yu Xingzhe. Nothing seemed to have changed on the outside, but actually, his nerves had been strained to its limit.

He was on the verge of collapsing at any time.

During the Spring Festival, «Devotion» was about to screen. Ye Chen gave Yu Xingzhe a call, "Brother Zhe! Come to the premiere, okay?"

Yu Xingzhe wanted to say yes, but he unexpectedly couldn't say it out loud even though he was on the verge of saying it.

Cinema—where there were weird seats and stale air…

Ye Chen called out, "Brother Zhe, are you listening?"

Yu Xingzhe hurriedly snapped out of it. He said, "Mn, I understand."

I'll go. I must go.

Ye Chen and Gu Xi were going, so how could he not go?

He must go to see the only work he had ever acted in for his whole life.

Still, it made his blood freeze and his body couldn't help but shudder when he thought about what would happen later.

If SUN was here, he would definitely arrange it in advance. The seats would be clean and cozy and the air would definitely make him able to relax. Even the sound effect would be adjusted to his liking…

Yu Xingzhe wanted to do these by himself, but he couldn't.

No other person could do whatever SUN did.

But SUN had already left.

Yu Xingzhe stared at his cellphone. He glared at SUN's name on his cellphone for a long time.

Call him, I'll call him…

Nope. I can't.

Yu Xingzhe threw his cellphone away. Then, he lied on his back and looked at the ceiling dejectedly.

On the day of the movie's premiere, Ye Chen and Ren Jing showed up at the same time, getting out of the car together. The look of the two of them standing together…was extremely well-matched.

Yu Xingzhe forced himself to feel even a tiny bit of joy.

Following that, one more car stopped. Gu Xi got out, followed by Shen Jiaze.

Yu Xingzhe, "…" Fuck, everyone has become a couple now? Just where was he supposed to stand between them?

The initial group of three had now become a group of five.

Being the only 'unneeded' person in the group, Yu Xingzhe simply wanted to turn around and leave!

"President Yu! You came so early?" Director Li, who had been flushed with success, greeted Yu Xingzhe.

Yu Xingzhe greeted him while putting on a fake smile.

Director Li was in a good mood, so good that he wanted to explode right there. Therefore, he wasn't aware of Yu Xingzhe's sour mood. He even affectionately patted Yu Xingzhe's back, then said, "Go, go, go, let's go in."

Yu Xingzhe was frozen still.

Li Fu was smoking just now! There was cigarette ash on his index finger! And he patted Yu Xingzhe's back just now!

The ashes must have stained his back!

Ahhhh! What was more frustrating was, Yu Xingzhe couldn't look at it, since there was no way he could look at his back!

He was wearing a white sweater, so the ashes…the ashes…

After imagining it for a while, Yu Xingzhe felt like he was going crazy soon.

He wasn't in the mood to watch the movie at all. He managed to keep a stiff smile and send Li Fu off. Afterwards, he hurriedly rushed into the restroom without looking back.

He couldn't keep wearing the sweater or else he would die!

But he only wore a shirt inside. If he took off the sweater and watched the movie, he would feel uncomfortable with the temperature…

It's fine to feel a little cold. He wouldn't want to wear the sweater, anyway.

Yu Xingzhe hurriedly took off the sweater. When he saw the fingerprint on it, he immediately threw the sweater into the trash can.

Fortunately, the air conditioner's temperature here was just right, so he didn't feel cold but just a bit dry.

His face, hands, and mouth felt dry.

Yu Xingzhe particularly missed the winters he spent with SUN, he especially, incredibly missed those memories.

He heaved a long sigh before collecting his train of thought and went to the cinema hall.

As expected, everything felt so uncomfortable that Yu Xingzhe wished he could turn around and run away.

Endure, I must endure!

Yu Xingzhe didn't want to sit near these four, so he accepted Director Li's offer and sat beside him.

The movie was absolutely very great.

Ren Jing's acting skills didn't need to be mentioned anymore. The most important thing was that Ye Chen also performed incredibly well.

The two were especially sweet when they were happy. And their happiness was foreshadowing the heart-wrenching scenes later.

At the movie's climax, Director Li immediately cried as he watched it. He told Yu Xingzhe in whispers, "Look at Ren Jing's acting, he's simply awesome!"

It was only a monodrama, yet Ren Jing's acting had such a powerful appeal.

Yu Xingzhe watched the movie seriously at first, but now… His mind was filled with Director Li's sniffling noise.

I want to die. I really want to die.

Yu Xingzhe wore a lifeless expression all the way through the latter part of the movie. How could he still watch the movie? All he could do was to control his legs so that they wouldn't force their way out.

After the premiere ended, they still had to have a meal together.

Yu Xingzhe couldn't stand it any longer, so he said that he had some matters he had to handle. He fled in defeat after mentioning an excuse.

But actually, where could he even 'flee' to?

Yu Xingzhe stopped the car, then rested his head on the steering wheel, looking utterly pitiful.

At a certain base.

Yu Xinghai immediately monitored his beloved little brother while snatching a little leisure from his busy work. He told SUN, "You should have done this a long time ago."

Before, he truly had no idea that SUN was this kind of person: he had become extremely softhearted. He was still at a standstill even though six years had passed, which was quite admirable.

SUN's thin lips were sealed shut, resulting in him not saying even a single word. But his pretty azure eyes were completely filled with worries.

Noticing SUN being like this, Yu Xinghai didn't even expect him to keep on working anymore. He waved his hands as he said, "Let's go, let's go. We don't need you here anymore."

The author has something to say:

How frustrating, you've guessed it.

That's right… The so-called resignation is because SUN's tiny schemes had backfired.

How would SUN believe that Yu Xingzhe likes Gu Xi? Isn't he the one who sees everything clearly instead~ [stretches hand]

However, he would have truly become Yu Xingzhe's lifetime assistant if he didn't resign.