I Might Be A Fake Cultivator

When the huge turtle opened its cavernous mouth, a terrifying power began to emanate forth.

An Lin, Tina, and the Jade Bone Immortal Bug all prepared for battle!

This was a necessary precaution. The power emanating from the huge turtle’s body was simply far too fearsome.

“Yawn…”

A massive, elongated yawn erupted.

The huge turtle opened its bleary eyes and seemed to be a little confused upon seeing An Lin and his two beast pets, but then it seemed to make some sort of recollection. “Oh! You’re…”

The turtle stretched the “you’re” into an extremely long word and didn’t continue with its sentence. It had clearly failed to remember who they were and was asking for help.

An Lin looked at the turtle expressionlessly. “I came here so that you can tell my fortune. Actually, no, you insisted on telling my fortune. Have you forgotten?”

The huge turtle seemed to have suddenly remembered something. It abruptly slapped itself in the head as it said, “Oh! Right right right… I remember now! That’s right, I was indeed telling your fortune for you!”

An Lin’s expression had completely darkened. Did this turtle have Alzheimer’s disease? Or did it have the memory of a goldfish? How could it forget something this quickly?

“Then, Senior, what have you seen?” An Lin repressed his urge to leave and inquired.

A thoughtful expression appeared on the huge turtle’s face, and after a brief silence, it turned toward An Lin again as countless black symbols suddenly appeared in its eyes…

An Lin was astonished.

What the f*ck?! Was the turtle telling his fortune again?

Had it actually forgotten everything?!

How terrifying!

An Lin felt like this mighty figure was a little dodgy.

Turtles were normally the epitome of reliability, but this huge turtle was clearly an exception to this.

After telling An Lin’s fortune again, the turtle slowly closed its eyes before withdrawing its head into its shell.

F*ck off!

An Lin immediately unleashed a Mountain Quaking Fist upon seeing this familiar scene!

Boom!

“Howl!”

The huge turtle’s head was knocked to the side, and it let loose a wail of anguish.

It opened its eyes with shock written all over its face. “Why did you hit me?”

“You’re trying to withdraw into your bloody shell and sleep again! Of course I’m going to have to hit you!” An Lin was infuriated.

The huge turtle rubbed its head with an aggrieved expression. “I was just closing my eyes to organize my thoughts.”

“Oh, is that so?” An Lin was a little apologetic. “Then please continue.”

The huge turtle heaved a faint sigh. “Your punch completely scattered my thoughts…”

An Lin: “…”

For some reason, An Lin felt as if he had been played again.

The huge turtle hurriedly provided an explanation upon seeing An Lin’s expression. “Even though my thoughts are a bit scattered, I can still tell you what I’ve seen!”

“Alright, go on then!”

The huge turtle’s eyes gradually lost focus. “Your past has been extremely spectacular and extraordinary.”

An Lin nodded upon hearing this. These past few years had indeed been quite spectacular and extraordinary.

The turtle continued, “The progression in your cultivation base has been extremely spectacular and extraordinary. ”

An Lin nodded.

Doing pushups, getting struck by lightning, drinking discharge from rock golems, punching above his weight, eating beast cores, combating a Golden Void Lightning Kirin—all of this was indeed quite spectacular and extraordinary.

The turtle: “Your love life has been extremely spectacular and extraordinary.”

An Lin: “…”

“Can’t you use another adjective?” An Lin asked with an exasperated expression.

“Has it not been extremely spectacular and extraordinary,” the turtle asked.

An Lin’s lips twitched. He had no counterargument to that.

The turtle: “Your money-making experience has been extremely spectacular and extraordinary.”

An Lin’s lips twitched. “Hehe.”

The turtle cocked its head to the side. “Is that incorrect?”

An Lin took a deep breath and clenched his hands into fists. “Do you know what I want to do right now?”

The turtle blinked. “What?”

A cold smile appeared on An Lin’s face. “I want to bash you!”

Boom boom boom…

A series of Mountain Quaking Fists erupted.

“Ahhh…”

The turtle’s massive head was severely ravaged by An Lin.

“What did I say wrong? Why would you hit me?!”

The huge turtle glowered at An Lin.

An Lin chuckled coldly as his fists surged with golden light. “You didn’t say anything wrong. I just wanted to let you know that my fighting style is also extremely spectacular and extraordinary!”

The turtle: “…”

“Alright… I’ll refrain from using those adjectives then,” the huge turtle conceded with difficulty.

An Lin nodded with contentment and allowed the turtle to continue.

The huge turtle wobbled its head from side to side. “Your path to gathering beast pets has also been extremely breathtaking and exceptional.”

An Lin was astonished.

Was this turtle f*cking serious?

Spectacular and extraordinary had become breathtaking and exceptional?

The veins on An Lin’s forehead bulged, and he repressed the urge to bash the turtle again, before turning to leave.

“Hey, hey! Why are you leaving?” The huge turtle was a little panicked upon seeing An Lin turn to leave.

An Lin didn’t even turn around. “I have my own business to attend to and cannot afford to waste time here!”

“I know you need something from me! I’ll agree to do it!” the turtle said in a panicked voice.

An Lin’s footsteps faltered before he turned to look at the turtle with an astonished expression.

Telling his fortune for free, helping him for free…

This situation seemed a little shifty no matter how you thought about it!

Why was this turtle willing to do all of these for him free of charge?

“I know what you’re worried about, Mr. An Lin.” The turtle provided an explanation while smiling, “I’m willing to help you not just because we are connected by fate.

“In reality, I have predicted a long time ago that I will encounter someone today who will decide the fate of the Heavenly Turtle Tribe. Hence, helping you will be the equivalent of helping my tribe.”

The huge turtle wobbled its head from side to side as it provided a slow explanation, “Hence, I can help you here, and you can help the Heavenly Turtle Tribe during our hour of need. Isn’t that a great deal?”

“Oh… I see…”

An Lin nodded before joining his hands in a salute to the old turtle. “Pardon my intrusion. I’ll be taking my leave now!”

He began to make his way out of this place even more quickly than before.

“Hey hey, Mr. An Lin, why are you still leaving? Was my explanation not clear enough?” the huge turtle immediately asked in a panicked voice.

“No, your explanation was very clear. However…”

An Lin’s lips twitched. “I only want your help with looking at a map. However, you’re trying to connect me to the fate of the entire Heavenly Turtle Tribe?! This is like if I wanted to buy a mousepad and you told me you can give me a mousepad for free, but in exchange, I’ll have to go save the world with you. That’s simply absurd!”

The huge turtle was a little confused. “What’s a mousepad?”

An Lin’s expression darkened. “That’s not the point! I don’t want this heavy responsibility on my shoulders, so I’m leaving now!”

“Please don’t go! I understand what you’re saying now!” The huge turtle spoke, “However, you have no choice but to cooperate with me this time. I am the High Priest of the Heavenly Turtle Tribe!”

An Lin’s footsteps came to a grinding halt.

There were hundreds of priests in the Heavenly Turtle Tribe, but only one of them was the High Priest!

This was the High Priest of the Heavenly Turtle Tribe, Gu Yu!

This was a turtle that was held in extremely high regard by the entire Heavenly Turtle Tribe.

An Lin turned with an incredulous expression to look at this turtle that seemed to have a loose screw. Never would he have thought that this dodgy old turtle would be a legendary character from the Heavenly Turtle Tribe!

“That’s right! I am the High Priest, Gu Yu.” The huge turtle looked at An Lin with a serious expression. “You have no choice but to cooperate with me. Otherwise… you will die!”