How to Raise Your Regressor

"And so far, you seem to be the most likely candidate," I replied to Jennifer.

While this might sound like absolute bullshit I made up solely to pass my time, it actually isn't.

Source: the boi who created those worlds.

"I am the… Sword?" Jennifer seemed genuinely amazed by this revelation, as if she couldn't believe it.

I thought that she would puff her chest with a scoff and say something like, 'Of course, I am the sword,' but her reaction is one of humility.

That's really out of character for someone who likes throwing around her weight as the Guild Leader of the largest Guild of this country; the conceit of this woman is almost amazing.

Unless she just intended it just as a joke.

If true, that would be a yikes from me, as that would mean that I failed to recognise that someone was joking.

In other words, I was the overreacting baby.

Oh my fucking god.

Looks like being around these wankers has messed up with my humour sensing radar. To think I'd take someone's banter seriously and berate them for it.

Not ideal.

If this goes on, I'll become the very thing I so abhor.

Something must be done.

Should I sleep? A nice little reset will probably fix everything.

And if it doesn't… Well, let's just say that the Aggressors will be scratching their heads for years over how a planet full of life suddenly became barren.

In other words, I'll shove a blackhole in each of their asses and yeet them into the information dimension.

That aside, it really is in bad taste for Jennifer to joke about her position of authority from that very position.

That's not a joke; it's just bad humour, and in some cases, bullying.

Oh, maybe that's why I didn't get her jokes. Jennifer is just a glorified Amy Shoomer.

Faith in my humour radar restored.

Now, let's resolve this motherfucker's doubts.

"The most likely candidate for it, as far as I can see."

I mean, it's totally possible that there is some motherfucker out there who has the ability to kill gods with a flick of his finger yet is just hiding his power because he wants to live a 'plain life' or some other bullshit.

Hmm? What do you mean I am that motherfucker?

I am different, okay? I'm not hiding my power to lead a peaceful life, okay?

Well, I mean, sure, I have the power to defeat the Aggressors with a snap of my finger, and that no one around me knows of that power nor do I intend to use it because that would be incredibly boring, but this and that are different.

So I'm innocent, okay?

"What makes you think that?" Jennifer asked.

Couldn't she see that I was busy proving my innocence there?

"Well, if I am to believe everything that you and others have told me about you so far, you are the strongest sentient being in this world."

"I'm not sure if I'm the strongest."

"Perhaps, but unless someone stronger than you appears, you are the holder of that title."

"Okay, that does make sense," Jennifer slowly nodded. "But what exactly is the Sword, anyway?"

What? She acted all amazed without actually knowing what it meant? Wow.

The term itself is self-explanatory, but I suppose it IS a doubt to have, so she gets a pass.

"To put it in layman terms, the Sword is the weapon the World prepares to fight against the threat of the invaders."

I mean that in the metaphorical sense, of course.

Though the sight of a literal huge ass planet swinging around a human as a sword would be highly amusing.

"What do you mean by 'World'?"

Oh my, I wasn't aware that Tristan has transmigrated as Jennifer. I wonder what he thinks about having a sore shoulder because of the weights on his chest.

"I mean the World as you see it."

I'm 70% sure that this woman understood absolutely nothing from my answer.

"But I don't remember anyone, much less the World, prepare me for anything… I did everything on my own," there was a certain crassness in her tone.

See?

"Really?"

I doubt she did everything by herself, especially in a world as harsh as this.

Not to mention if she did, she would be the protagonist of this world, not Azell.

Huh, a story where the Regressor is not the main character? Sign me up, baby.

"From the day I came into this World, I have achieved everything through my own effort. There was certainly no one around me who 'prepared' me for what I've gone through," she scoffed.

It would seem I have offended her. Noice.

The farther she stays away from me, the easier it will be for me to die I mean have peace of mind because no one likes having wankers around.

"I find that hard to believe."

"I imagine you do," she smiled. "The world is much harsher than what you imagine it to be, Samur. You are the only one you can truly rely on-"

"Pfft!"

Oh shit, I almost burst out laughing. She's going to kill me.

No, wait.

"…" Jennifer squinted.

"I, uh, get where you are coming from. However, contrary to the implications of your… edgy talk, I was simply wondering about your statement from an objective point of view. Statistically speaking, in a world full of living, sentient beings, the probability of you having done everything with absolutely no help is astronomically low."

"But the probability is still there, isn't it?" She folded her arms.

"Yes, but practically it is zero. I mean, you would have to be an absolute antisocial piece of shit who even the vilest and craziest people would steer clear of. And I doubt you are that kind of person."

Unless she is.

Hmm, I wouldn't put it past her- no wait, Azell and Ms. CR have interacted with her.

Sadge.

"Hoh, you really wanna go there?" Jennifer's eyebrow twitched.

This woman and her obsession with breakfast, ugh. Even after all my efforts to distract her, she's still hung up on that.

It's almost impressive, in a way.

"I don't want to go anywhere, Ms. Jennifer."

Let's try to resolve it diplomatically.