How to Raise Your Regressor

"Ah, is it that?" Neia suddenly exited her 'to be or not to be' state and looked up at me.

I can only wonder what weird conclusion this dumbass has arrived at now.

Whatever it is, I'm sure it couldn't be far from the truth.

She must have looked too deeply into my words and actions and arrived at an answer that's literally on the opposite end of the spectrum. Classic Neia.

You know what? Let's hear it.

I want to know just how wrong she is.

"Is that what?"

"Are you perhaps annoyed at Clementine because she tried to deliberately put her life in danger?"

"…"

That's… within my expectations, actually.

This just confirms my suspicions about how this Dragon sees me.

Neia seems to think that I believe my own life has no worth but the lives of others have.

And I do believe that, but in a way different than what she imagines it to be.

She seems to be under the impression that I CARE for their lives but don't care for my own. She's wrong.

Objectively speaking, the life of someone else is worth more than mine because even if I die, I'll just move onto my next life with all my memories but they won't.

However, that's objectively speaking. My own subjective opinion might vary.

For example, before today, I might have sacrificed my life for Clementine's because I would have looked at such a situation objectively. But now? I'll push her into a bottomless pit if that's what it takes to prank her.

In other words, all life is worthless to me; I just by default deem the lives of others to be slightly less worthless than mine.

"Is… is that true?" Clementine looked at me with trembling eyes.

Why is she acting like this? She should know that it couldn't be far from the truth.

"…It sure does not seem like it," Lecia commented as she stared at my face.

Ah, looks like I was so disgusted by Neia's answer that I couldn't control my facial expression in time.

Sed.

"Look, Ms. Neia."

"Yeah?"

"I'm not saying you are the dumbest person on this planet, but please hope they don't die."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Now," I turned to Clementine. "You are interfering in Ms. Neia's training. Please leave."

"Not until you tell me why you're angry."

Bruh, just why is she hung up on that?

Even if I assume that by some divine miracle, she really has no idea why I'm seething with wrath, what does she hope to achieve by repeatedly asking me about it other than angering me even further?

I swear to god her incessant nagging is becoming more annoying than her prank itself.

Or maybe that's her strategy?

Hmmm.

Damn, she's good.

"I see," I nodded. "Well, Ms. Neia, looks like we'll have to postpone our training for today. We'll continue this tomorrow."

"Wha!?" Clementine exclaimed. "I'm not letting you leave!"

"Conflict resolution in a relationship is not one of your strong suits, is it?"

"…" She bit her lips, then spoke in a low voice. "I've never been in any kind of relationship before this, so I don't know what I should do…"

"Oof. Well, I don't know what you should do either, but I'm pretty sure that what you're currently doing is not it."

"Then what should I do? Please, tell me."

"Ask Neia. I have something to do."

"Oh, come on!"

"No, seriously. My plan was to quickly teach the basics to Neia then leave her to train by herself. I have to meet some people, after all. But that plan went down the drain due to some… unforeseen circumstances."

Hmmm, now that I think about it, how late is too late for an abortion? Clementine is a few weeks old while Lecia is 13 years old.

Shouldn't be that late, in my opinion. I'll be just doing what their birth mothers might have regretted not doing.

I'm supposed to be their mother figure, anyway.

"…" Clementine averted her gaze.

"Ms. Neia, please teach them the basics of forming meaningful relationships. They are in dire need of it."

"Wait, why me?" Lecia retorted.

Why her? Hmmmm….

Ah right, this dumb bitch choked me to death. I almost forgot about it.

…I really might be suffering from short term memory loss, though in my defence, it wasn't important enough to remember.

"Well, after what you did last time, I'd say that you need this lesson more than Clementine does."

"…" Lecia pursed her lips as she averted her gaze as well.

That's a lot of averted gazes. Wow.

"I'll be leaving them in your care," I nodded to Neia.

"No, wait!"

Before the dumb Dragon could protest in any way, I swiftly activated flight magic using my DVH heart and beelined straight for the door.

I pushed that door open (after slowing myself down a bit) and went up the flight of stairs.

Because this Guild was apparently too stingy to install a fucking lift, I was left with no choice but to fly.

No way in hell am I walking up these stairs.

I mean, my body is just so shit that it can hardly handle climbing the stairs to reach my room on the 2nd floor. Climbing up 40 floors is more impossible than having Hitler love Jews.

Of course, some might say that I should stop relying so heavily on magic and start training my body, and to them I say, 'Fuck off'.

Making my Shit Body into non-shit is too tedious of a task. Why should I work so hard when I can literally solve all my problems using magic?

Can't climb stairs? Just fly.

Can't attack with swords? Just use floating ice swords.

Can't win an argument with a child? Just trap them in a time prison.

Can't jump out of a window? Just use magic to stop your heart.

It's all ez.

Anyway, while I was affirming my life choices, I had reached the 40th floor aka the ground floor of this Guild.

I cancelled my magic spell, opened the door and went to my room (without flying; sed).

It's 6:20, huh? Damn, I'm going to be late, and it's all because of Clementine. She really had to go and pull that stupid prank on me and waste my time.

Well, I mean the meeting is at 6:30 so I still have some time, but it's time for my evening coffee.

And I'm not going anywhere without my coffee. It's important to maintain a work life balance.

If not for Clementine, I could have had my coffee and still attend the meeting on time, but that's no longer possible.

Fuck you, Clementine.

I didn't get to teach Neia anything either. Well, anything other than the philosophical lesson on the meaning of holding a gun.

Anyway, after having my coffee and a nice, relaxing shower, I finally made my way towards Azell's office. Upon reaching, I knocked and entered.

"You're late," came an impatient voice from the sofa placed in the room for entertaining guests.

Wait, that makes it sound like it was the sofa who rebuked me.

"Good evening to you too, Princess."