Guide on How to Fail at Online Dating

Edited by Divetus

Jing Huan found that sure enough, people can't stay in their comfort zones all the time.

After being forced into defeat in two matches, his heart ached as he looked at the points he had lost.

It wasn't because of Qiufeng; rather, it was because a combination of two sealers really did prove to be more difficult to fight with than one support and one DPS. They couldn't keep up with the damage rate in the first place. Although Jing Huan was fully equipped, his summoning beast's rank wasn't high. The Nine-Tailed Fox's grade wasn't up to par and would get killed in two swings by their opponents.

After Regardless of Lovesickness and Chunxiao sent them out of the PK arena, Qiufeng wanted to comfort his teammate but then his friend notifications lit up.

[Friend] Chunxiao: Did you two team up tonight to just give away points? Philanthropist?

[Friend] Qiufeng: Why didn't you go easy on me!

[Friend] Chunxiao: My wife is rushing to get up to 4000 points. Why are you with Xiao Tianjing again?

[Friend] Qiufeng: My teammate isn't here tonight ah. I originally didn't want to fight, but suddenly, I discovered that Yearning For wasn't online, so I called her up. [evil chuckle]

[Friend] Chunxiao: I suggest you dissolve the team on the spot. With Yearning For, she's always gaining points, but with you, she's actually losing points. The more matches you two play, the better she'll find Yearning For.

Qiufeng angrily smiled, sending out a disdainful emoticon.

Jing Huan spoke into the microphone for a long time, then remembered that he hadn't pressed the key to speak, so Qiufeng couldn't hear him.

He didn't use YY very often and wasn't used to the program's default push-to-talk setting. He slowly pressed F2. "Qiufeng, maybe you should find another teammate?"

Qiufeng responded, "No ah, the first two were because I misfired. In the next few, I'll definitely take you to the top."

"No," said Jing Huan. "It's because I'm too noob, and your score is so high. It's not worthwhile to team up with me."

After the promotion of the multiplayer team competition, a new rule for the arena was added recently: high rank players teaming up with low rank players to play in the arena would obtain 20% fewer points when winning and lose 20% more points when losing.

"No, I just want to team up with you." Qiufeng paused a bit. "And weren't you with Yearning For this entire time? He's the one with the highest rank in the entire server."

Jing Huan's movements slowed.

It really was like that.

However, because they had lost very few matches, he had never thought about this point, and Yearning For had never mentioned it to him.

"Get ready ba." Worried about her leaving, Qiufeng started to urge her.

"Oh… alright ba."

Entering the match pairing interface, Qiufeng coughed. "By the way, Xiao Jing, the All the Lovers in the World event is happening soon. Do you want to do it with me? I'll carry you."

Jing Huan repeated blankly, "All the Lovers in the World event?"

Qiufeng suddenly remembered that Xiao Tianjing was new to NCH, but her technique always gave him the wrong impression of being a veteran player. "It's NCH's year-end event, similar to the Valentine's Day and Qixi Festival events. However, the All the Lovers event is specifically for increasing intimacy scores. If you complete all 100 levels, you can even get a brocade bag apparel that will expire in a year. When you hang it on your outfit, it looks very nice."

When Qiufeng mentioned it, Jing Huan then recalled what it was.

This event was actually very popular with players— especially female players.

Who didn't want to have a high intimacy score with their partner?

In the game, the higher the intimacy score between a husband and wife, the stronger the exclusive skills of a husband and wife. Although, no matter how strong the skills were, they couldn't be better than a sect's exclusive skills. However, in showing off a couple's love, they were first-class.

But there was also an obvious drawback.

"The quests are time consuming and have little experience value. God Xiang probably won't do them ba?" Qiufeng chuckled and said, "If I remember correctly, he's never done it these last few years."

Jing Huan also felt that Yearning For wouldn't do it.

After all, he himself had never done it before either. Probably, the only person who would look forward to this event was sadly Lu Wenhao.

Just as he refused Qiufeng's invitation, his cellphone in front of him suddenly rang.

It was the group chat Long Road Ahead had pulled together before, and now there were already five people in it.

Little Road Little Road Certainly Wouldn't Get Lost: @Xiao Jing ya, Xiao Jingjing, I love you so much! Come out quickly and Gege will give you a kiss!!

Chichi: ?

Xiao Jing ya: ??? Gege is still in the group, don't try anything with me!

Xiao Jing ya: [Go Away, Quickly Leave, Do You Still have Face.JPG]

Little Road Little Road Certainly Wouldn't Get Lost: I saw your contribution to the team, and I'll always remember you.

Little Road Little Road Certainly Wouldn’t Get Lost: Xiao Jing, don’t fight with Xiangxiang in the arena anymore, just go with Qiufeng! Throw away all his points into a pit for me!! With you there, he’ll never surpass me during his entire life!!

“&#k2026;”

Fuck.

Jing Huan felt humiliated.

Once, he had also been a powerful figure in his old server who could call down the winds and the rains. At that time, there had been more than 100 people in his guild. For those who saw him, who didn't greet him as Ge?

Now, he's become a burden.

A king-sized burden, even.

It's all because of Yearning For!!

If it weren't for him, how could he have fallen to this state!

Xiao Jing ya: You just want to deceive me, so that Gege can help you climb ranks. 🙂

Xiao Jing ya: [sharing song - I'm Not Fooled By You]

After sharing the song to the group and seeing that Yearning For never popped up, Jing Huan opened a private chat window and habitually sent out a few expressions.

Xiao Jing ya: Want to provoke Gege [draw a circle]

After sending that sentence, he skillfully picked out a few cute emoticons and sent them all over at once.

Xiang: En.

Jing Huan paused when trying to lock the screen.

Replying so fast?

Xiao Jing ya: 0.0 Gege! I thought you weren't here ne.

Both of Xiang Huaizhi's long legs were casually hanging off the armrest of the sofa, and he was leaning his head against his hand. His eyes were deep and fathomless, his thoughts completely unknown.

If you thought he wasn't there, then why send him messages.

Xiang: Just finished dinner.

Xiao Jing ya: I've eaten too la. I'm playing in the arena right now. ~\(≧▽≦)/~

Xiang: I know.

Xiao Jing ya: Huh? How did you know??

Xiang: …

Xiang: Just looked in the guild group chat.

"Xiao Jing, heal up my summoning beast a bit," The voice of his teammate came out from his earphones. "What are you doing ne? Why aren't you moving?"

Jing Huan looked up and found that they had cut into a battle. He reflexively locked his cellphone. "Ah, coming."

Xiang Huaizhi held his cellphone, quietly waiting for a few minutes.

That person fell silent. Usually he replied in seconds, but this time, they didn't even send an emoticon.

Baba Xiang came over holding a newspaper and sat at Xiang Huaizhi's side on the sofa. "Why the long face? Was dinner not delicious?"

After he said that, Baba Xiang lowered his voice. "Your mom only has two hobbies now: cooking and playing mahjong. No matter how bad it might taste, you have to bear it. Don't let her see through you."

Xiang Huaizhi lowered his eyes and set his cellphone to the side. "That's not it."

At this time, Mama Xiang's voice came from the mahjong room. "Husband!"

Baba Xiang immediately stood up and ran to the door of mahjong room. "What's the matter?"

"Go to the snack street and buy us some chicken feet."

Baba Xiang frowned. "I'll call over some delivery."

Mama Xiang retorted, "That shop doesn't do delivery."

Baba Xiang looked very reluctant, but he had just nodded when he heard a sentence from behind him.

"I'll go." Xiang Huaizhi stood up and picked up his coat on the sofa.

He hesitated for a moment, but ultimately took his cellphone with him and put it in his pocket. "How many do you want?"

After Xiang Huaizhi left, Mama Xiang looked at her husband and asked, "You were nagging him again?"

After all, she had brought him up from childhood. She could see at a glance that her son wasn't in a good mood.

"I didn't actually say anything," Baba Xiang replied.

*

Xiang Huaizhi carried two bags of chicken feet as he walked down the road.

The cellphone in his pocket had been vibrating the whole way, but he had walked straight ahead with no intentions of looking at it.

Passing by the supermarket, he thought about it and decided to go in and buy some bread for breakfast tomorrow.

While checking out, the girl in front of him was on the phone. They weren't standing that close, but Xiang Huaizhi could still hear her call.

"Hmph, he has sent me another 20+ messages and made several phone calls."

"I'm definitely not acknowledging him."

"Who told him to get so close to other girls ah! We clearly agreed that he would only play the game with me, and then he turned around to take other support girls around to get points! No way, this time, I must make him dangle there to make him realize his own mistake!"

Xiang Huaizhi: "…"

Just outside of the supermarket, Xiang Huaizhi took out his cellphone and began to read the messages he had just received.

Seems to be similar, but he's different from that girl just now, to some extent.

Xiao Jing ya: I just got sent into a fight. [kitty rolling around]

Xiao Jing ya: Wuwuwu, Gege, I lost a lot of points tonight…

Xiao Jing ya: I'm the most pitiful person in the world now.

Xiao Jing ya: Can't win the fight, and Gege has also disappeared. T▽T

Xiao Jing ya: [screenshot]

In the screenshot, the little fox fairy was doing a crying character action.

The scene behind the little fox fairy was a wild map. Xiang Huaizhi frowned and looked up to check the time. It was just past 8:30, the arena wasn't over yet.

Jing Huan sat in front of the computer, propping his chin with his hands and hanging his head, boredly looking through different video selections.

A WeChat prompt popped up at the top of the screen and he immediately stopped browsing through videos and clicked it open.

Xiang: Weren't you fighting in the arena?

Xiao Jing ya: Qiufeng's teammate just came online, and I found an excuse to leave la.

Xiao Jing ya: The points are all the efforts of Gege bitterly laboring away while taking me with him, I'm not willing to just lose all of them. QAQ

He made it sound nice, as though the person who had just lost all the points in the arena wasn't him.

Xiang: How many points do you have now?

Xiao Jing ya: 2422

Xiang: So you lost sixty.

Not mentioning it was okay, but as soon as he said that, Jing Huan's heart ached.

Xiao Jing ya: Wuwuwuwuwuwu~~(>_<)~~

After crying, Jing Huan thought something was wrong again.

Xiao Jing ya: Huh? Gege, how do you know how many points I had before?

Xiao Jing ya: Gege, you were investigating my points!!!

He hadn't actually done any detective work. If anyone wanted to know his points, you only needed to enter his ID at an NPC to check.

Xiang Huaizhi's pace slowed down a bit, and it took him a long time to type.

Xiang: I wanted to see how far away you were from 3000 points.

Xiang: But now, it seems that you don't particularly want the reward at 3000 points.

Xiao Jing ya: Ah??

Xiang: Otherwise, why go give away points with Qiufeng.

Xiao Jing ya: He's the one who invited me….

Xiang: As long as he invites you, you go?

Jing Huan was stunned.

He blinked, first slowly typing out the word "I", then suddenly stopped. He quickly scrolled up and down the screen, looking back and forth at their conversation several times.

Was he delusional?

Why did he feel like… something was weird?

Hadn't Long Road Ahead also lost a lot of points before? He hadn't seen Yearning For say anything about it ah.

An awkward and outrageous idea came to him abruptly. Jing Huan felt it was impossible, but he couldn't help but flirt with Yearning For.

Xiao Jing ya: Gege.

Xiang:?

Xiao Jing ya: Are you actually jealous? >0<

Sure enough, just after the message was sent out, the top of the chat box immediately changed to "Typing…"

Jing Huan could imagine the urgent and full of denial appearance of the person across the screen and found it a little funny.

He stared at the screen to see what Yearning For would say.

A minute went by.

"Typing…"

Five minutes went by.

"Typing.."

Ten minutes went by.

"Typing…"

Jing Huan: "…"

Fuck?

No way ba, Da Ge?

I just wanted to tease you, but you're not about to write an 800 word composition to scold me for being amorous ba???

12 minutes later, Jing Huan bit his lower lip and decided to break the deadlock.

He turned on the keyboard, typing slowly.

"Gege, I was just saying that—"

Buzz.

Xiang: No.

Xiang: Just, if you team up with other people to fight in the arena again in the future, don't try to team up with me anymore. I'm not in the habit of wiping other people's asses.

—

Juurensha: Ohhhhhhh XHZ, you're super jealous.

Divi: This is such jealous, childish behaviour XHZ!!! If I was Huanhuan, I'd just be like "fine, I won't team up with you then." See how XHZ feels then when his wish came true. >:(

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