Everybody is Kung Fu Fighting, While I Started a Farm

6

Panda Novel

"Eh? The Proud Dragon Repents technique is actually available on the Internet?"

Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms, first style: The Proud Dragon Repents.

"Slightly bend the left foot, pivot right arm inward, draw a semi-circle with right palm and push outward. The stronger one's true qi is, the more powerful this move would be…"

Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms, second style: The Dragon Soars in the Sky.

"Leap into the air and smash down from up high. Deliver an agonizing blow upon your foe as you streak down from above, a powerful strike of immense proportions. As you land, the winds in your palm would keep your foe beneath caught, unable to evade as they would be forced to take the brunt of your blow…"

Snort!

Jiang He, who was copying the Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms couldn't stifle a laugh right then.

"Which genius uploaded this stuff? Writing down every move of the Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms and even giving a proper explanation… is this guy an idiot?"

3

"Oh… forget it."

"If the one uploading these is an idiot, what am I when I'm copying everything word for word?"

1

Jiang He steeled himself and continued to copy away, making up to six pages of notes.

And when he was done, he crumpled the papers into a single lump, got a shovel and began to dig into his yard.

When he managed to make a hole, he threw the paper in it and turned on his System, using 100 farm points to redeem a 'nitrogen fertilizer' which he threw into the hole as well.

5

He then refilled the hole, before bringing out half a bucket of water to wet it.

Done.

Mission accomplished.

Dusting himself, Jiang He shook his head, unable to stop himself from laughing. "What I'm doing is a little retarded, isn't it? Cultivation is a slow, planned process. Who on earth would plant it?"

2

"Most importantly, I copied that cultivation off Baidu, and it could be something someone fabricated… Hmm?"

Jiang He's ears were suddenly twitching just then.

Having almost reached the level of martial artists, his hearing had become very sharp, and he had actually heard a soft 'crack'.

The soil beneath his feet was stirring, as if something was about to break through to the surface.

2

"Woah…"

Jiang He's eyes were bulging as he stared tightly at the position where he had planted the Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms. He then found a jade green sprout firmly parting the earth as it drilled its way out while growing at a speed visible to the naked eye.

3

Then, in around ten minutes, it grew into a small tree shoot.

"That… That… That is just unbelievable. It really works?!" Jiang He gaped.

8

The truth was that planting a 'cultivation manual' was actually a sudden eccentricity that came to mind.

1

Since he was idling anyway, why not make a copier and then plant the papers as a joke?

1

He didn't expect that this could really happen.

And now, the tree shoot continues to grow.

Dumbo had run over here as well, its canine face having 'what the hell' written all over it.

6

Jiang He sneered and said, "Dumbo, if you dare leak this tale, I am going to kill you and eat your flesh!"

4

Dumbo shuddered, and quickly half-crouched while putting its two front paws over its eyes, gesturing that it saw nothing.

1

Still, dogs were very curious creatures by nature, and just three seconds into blindfolding itself, Dumbo split a small seam between its claws, sneakily studying the 'tree' that was now over a meter tall.

It was unusually shaped for a tree, resembling a green stick being held up.

At first, the 'stick' had a few leaves, but all of them fell off when it grew up to one point five meters.

Soon, the upper end of the stick began to split into eighteen bald branches.

Each branch soon matured, each of which blossomed with a single white flower on their tip, letting loose their pollen when a small breeze came blowing.

"What… the… hell!"

Jiang He didn't even dare to blink as he kept his eyes fixed on each of the white flowers.

The dancing pollen had actually taken the shape of tiny dragon silhouettes that soared in a circle over the center of the flower just then. The waves of draconic roars were deafening, but despite finding it thunderous, Jiang He realized that his neighbors were not startled, let alone other villagers.

"Maybe the sounds in my yard can't be heard outside?"

It was not impossible after all: The System had determined that his farm was 888 square meters which incidentally was this entire yard, and it wouldn't be surprising if there were such an effect.

"If sounds here won't be heard outside, would the stuff I plant be seen by others?"

"Wait, the flowers are withering and about to bear… cultivation manuals!"

Jiang He stirred. Looking up at the flowers again, he saw that the dragon silhouettes that had been dancing amongst the flowers had suddenly vanished, sprinkling pollen over each flower.

Soon, the flowers shriveled, turning into yellowed papers.

At first, the papers were the size of fingernails, but it took just fifteen minutes for them to expand up to half the size of an A4 paper when they stopped growing.

Jiang He understood immediately.

The cultivation manual that he had planted was ripe.

While it was as paranormal as it was ridiculous, it was a reality that happened right before his eyes.

Extending his hand, Jiang He plucked off one paper.

[Ding!]

[Farm points +10]

A System notification jingled in his head.

"Eh?"

Gasping in surprise, Jiang He couldn't be bothered to look at the paper in his hand just then, and looked instead at his System.

[Name: Jiang He]

[Cultivation: Quasi Martial Artist]

[Ability: None]

[Owned Land: 888m²]

[Farm Level: 1 (EXP 3/50)]

[System Backpack: 3 boxes]

[System Shop: Unlocked]

[Farm Points: 493]

2

"My EXP actually increased a bit?"

Jiang He was a little surprised. His EXP had only increased up to two after harvesting 99 cucumbers and 84 corn ears, but now one page of cultivation manual had increased his EXP by 1 point as well as 10 farm points!

"If I stick to this method, I could gather some farm points and EXP so that my farm level increases."

Jiang He was feeling inspired even as he looked at the yellowed paper in his hand.

On it was a line of beautifully written calligraphy that read: Dragon Soars in the Sky!

And then…

And then there was nothing else.

Jiang He: "???"

"I wrote over four pages, and this is what I get?"

It was only the name of the move, without any content for cultivation… useless!

2

"Forget it, I'll just consider that I was farming for EXP and farm points." Jiang He consoled himself, breathing a long sigh while showing a face full of disappointment.

After all, he had spent 100 farm points to exchange for the nitrogen fertilizer, and earning 18 EXP along with 180 farm points was a profit however he saw it.

[Ding]

[Farm Points +10]

Jiang He plucked off another yellowed people which had the four words 'The Proud Dragon Repents written over it'.

The third yellowed paper read 'The Dragon Fights in the Wilderness', which was the fifteenth style of the Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms.

Eventually, after plucking off all eighteen yellowed papers, Jiang He stacked them by their ascending sequence when—

[Ding!]

[A low-level martial art has been detected in the Host's crops. Consume 500 farm points to learn?]

Delighted, Jiang He quickly said, "Learn! Hurry up!"

[Farm points -500]

In his head, another system notification jingled.

Right then, Jiang He was already imagining a dragon's silhouette taking into the air even as he moved his hands, blowing up everything in its path…

But nothing happened at all after half a day.

Blinking, Jiang He exclaimed angrily, "System, you've already deducted my farm points. Where is my Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms?"

[Ding!]

[This martial art requires the energizing of True Qi. The Host had yet to cultivate up to Rank 4 martial artist and therefore could not learn it.]

1

"What…"

Jiang He almost puked blood just then as he seethed. "What about the farm points I lost?"

[The deducted farm points would be restored to Host in 24 hours. Please be patient.]

2

Dang it!

Jiang He promptly turned off the System, afraid that it would add the line 'Please press 9 to repeat, or press * to return to the previous menu'.