D.E.M.O.N.S: Getting Summoned Weekly isn't so Bad
1110 Chapter 1110 Sassy Forms
"Hey Kamiko, when do I need to sign up for Lust?" asked Kat.
"Um… I think you've got twelve months?" offered Kamiko "It's not a super tight deadline, we are encouraged to explore our options before committing… but it's not forever. Why, did you want to sign up soon?"
Kat nodded, "Yeah I mean… I guess I haven't spent too much time on it, but I just don't see myself picking any of others, even with my asexuality. Lust just seems… cool. The only other one I can see myself going for is Wrath but… I don't want combat to be my life, and Lust does have an enforcer division if that's something I ever want to get into,"
Kamiko nodded, "Yeah, no I understand. I've heard a lot of good things about Lust as a group. School has taught us that not all branches of Lust are quite as… family friendly, but the one here? They like to brag about having some of the highest approval ratings across all hubs. The head office for Lust is pretty happy with them despite the lack of overt sexuality everywhere,"
"Right… so how do I sign up?" asked Kat.
"You either go in person to fill out forms, download a bunch of forms, or look up the online version of the forms, and fill those out," said Kamiko.
"That's… shockingly normal," said Kat.
Kamiko and Sue shrugged together before Kamiko continued, "Yeah, filling it out doesn't even take that long, or so I've heard. In fact, if you want we can go through and fill it out now, seeing as you won't have access to it back on Earth. Though, if you'd rather I can print out a copy for you to take back home. You can just deliver the completed forms later,"
"I'll just do it later, I doubt you'd be interested in watching me fill out what are basically government forms," said Kat.
"No I totally want to see," said Kamiko, to Kat and Lily's surprise. "Apparently the 'additional information' sections are rife with a bunch of interesting little details that is more or less Lust insulting all the other factions, and sometimes themselves. I've never bothered to look them up… but this is a great excuse!"
Sue shrugged and said, "For me, I'll just fill out the forms as well and save them for when I get to Rank 3. I'll probably need to look over them again when I actually submit them for real, but I can make a good start, so I don't mind doing this together,"
Kat shrugged, "Well, if you're all ok with it," said Kat.
A round of nods followed Kat's declaration, everyone was happy enough to go through the forms now. It started out with basic stuff, name, date of birth, dimension of origin, confirmation that yes, Lust, is the faction you're trying to join and a few other standard things. It didn't take long, though Kat did have to think about who to put down in the 'parents' section. Luckily there was an option to tick to see Kat's guardians were her adopted parents, or well, just adopted mother in this case. No need to presume things about Callisto for now. When Kat got to the rules, she found her first bit of shade. It was to do with laws, and said the following.
'All members of the Lust faction are encouraged to uphold the law, both for the Hub, and whatever additional private arrangements building holders put in place. Lust will not protect you from any rule breaking, and will encourage law enforcement to be thorough in their punishments if it is deemed necessary.
Additionally, Lust has taken an additional interest in crimes of a sexual nature. In the event you get charged for any of the following: Public Indecency, Corrupting the Youth or Rape. Lust will force additional punishments onto the signer of this contract. While Lust does encourage freedom, self expression, and of course, casual sex, it must also be kept in mind that Lust offers services for these things. There are areas, including residential ones, where a number of riskier sexual fetishes can be explored safely for all involved. Going out of your way to ignore these facilities and cause issue to the general public will be met with creative punishments.
Yes that's right, unlike Sloth who will shield you from the consequences of sleeping at work, Wrath who will pay for a certain amount of property damage if a fight breaks out, Envy who makes allowances for theft, Greed who champions tax evasion where possible, including handing out seminars on how to avoid as much tax as legally possible, Lust takes the opposite approach. You have been offered a chance to indulge. Use it responsibly or we will hurt you.'
"I see what you mean about insulting the other factions," said Kat pointing at the notice.
Kamiko nodded, "Yeah. It's not quite as bad as they make it out to be. Greed for example, would argue that since it isn't illegal it's technically not tax evasion. Sloth will still make you do the work you miss sleeping on the job, they just don't care if you stay late to finish it because you slept during the day,"
"What about Envy though?" asked Kat.
Sue spoke, "They have a rehabilitation program for kleptomaniacs… but they also have really good lawyers. As long as whatever is stolen has been returned in less then a week, and still remains in the condition it was found in, or better, then it's really hard to get anything to stick. They… nearly are as bas as Lust is making them out to be.
"Oh… right…" said Kat. "What about Gluttony and Pride?"
Kamiko answered with, "Gluttony doesn't make any excuses for their members either. It's why Lust isn't mentioning it. Gluttony also goes out of their way to provide ways for members to eat as much as they want, of basically whatever they want. Though that is a double edged sword… Mum complains a bit of weird Gluttony demons that like eating things very much not compatible with their bodies. Sure most of the time, it's technical edible because demons can eat anything… but in sufficient quantities it can become a problem,"
Sue then took the lead, "As for Pride demons, they have great lawyers as well, some of the best… but you do still have to pay for them. Pride demons sort of keep each other in check. Paying for a lawyer you don't need is shameful, as is getting caught doing something you're not supposed to… but if you didn't do it? The lawyers are basically free and they get to be all smug about it."
"Right," said Kat with a nod.
Kat kept going and found other entries that made fun of the other factions, such as one talking about the free benefits Lust gave away, poking shade at Greed for being willing to give away things. Other sections talking about the services on offer, with a note on the 'degradation sessions' that poked fun at Pride for needing a good working over. Surprisingly, the one that talked about food, instead of an attack on Gluttony, was an admittance that Lust's version wasn't as good. "Why do you think they'd admit something like that?"
"The surprise," said Sue, "Now you're really thinking about it. They can't just keep criticising everyone else otherwise it seems like they have unrealistic expectations of themselves. By admitting Gluttony does something better, they can show that they can self-reflect,"
Kat nodded and continued reading, mostly just brushing over all the sexual offers they had available, both as work, and as a service for pampering yourself. Sue kept pulling attention towards them, but she was mostly ignored. Each fetish listed, and god there were a lot of them, had their own little quip that were always related. Some of the… safer ones to mention were as follows.
For Humiliation, the note was: Only people with no other value in this world pick this option. They're basically worthless, and we don't really need them, but they need to go somewhere right?
For the other side, Domination the note was: We always need more people to punish the idiots. Sometimes we even get idiots from other factions, and you can put them in their place.
Sue insisted they were both very compelling arguments for people who enjoyed that sort of thing. Kat really wasn't sure what to make of any of them. Nothing seemed to stand out to her… but Lily blushed quite a few times looking through the rather extensive section. Kat knew that a lot of those memories would need to be locked away in 'The Talk' box, just because of the horrors learnt… but Sue's laughter every time Kat found something objectionable helped pull her mind away from the horrors and enjoy the time with her friends. While it did take longer to read with the running commentary, Kat wouldn't have wanted it any other way.
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