Dead on Mars

Translator: CKtalon  Editor: CKtalon

Tang Yue typed one character at a time on the keyboard: “In the middle of the fourteenth century, Italian poet, Dante Alighieri, created the famous long poem, Divine Comedy. He was the first person that brought light to the dark Middle Ages that eventually developed into Renaissance humanism. In this long poem, Dante’s first personfsuzkvbfccccccc…”

“Tang Yue!”

Tomcat lifted Tang Yue’s face off the keyboard and slapped him in the face.

“Get some rest if you’re too tired.”

“It’s fine. It’s fine. I can take it.” Tang Yue rubbed his eyes and shook his head as he yawned. He continued typing: “Dante’s first person narrative tells of his journey from Earth to Mars…”

Tomcat shook its head, pressing Tang Yue against the chair and moving the computer away. If this continued, Dante might end up becoming the first Earthling to land on Mars.

It made Tang Yue sit at the side to rest and gather his senses. Tang Yue’s mind had recently been filled with Martian orbits and Orion to the point of being possessed. At night, his sleep talking would involve the mass of the lander, and how a hundred tonnes added to a hundred tonnes equaled three hundred tonnes.

“How many?” Tomcat raised one claw in front of Tang Yue.

“One.”

“How many?” Tomcat raised another claw.

“Two.”

Tomcat suddenly raised four claws. “What’s one plus two?”

“Four.”

“Look at you. Your mind is in a complete mess. You can’t even do simple addition. Tang Yue, don’t do anything for now. Have some rest. Miss Mai Dong needs some rest as well. The two of you need to relieve your pressure as well; otherwise, your bodies won’t make it.” Tomcat waved its paw and returned to its seat in front of the computer and stared at the monitor’s data.

The second mock had failed, slapping Tomcat in the face. Even at this moment, his face was still burning in pain.

Tomcat had no idea what had gone wrong either. It was indeed unreliable to rely on the rough simulations of the workstation. It needed a wind tunnel, a fatigue test, a structural integrity test, and a lot of specialized test machines. Each machine was huge, and Kunlun Station had none of them.

Tomcat really wished to stuff the entire Orion II spacecraft into the assembly factory and test all of its parameters in detail.

“When can the third mock proceed?” Tang Yue asked. “How confident are you?”

“The fourth mock ended five minutes ago,” Tomcat answered.

Tang Yue was alarmed.

“What was the result?”

“I created the biggest fin stabilization armor-piercing sabot in history,” Tomcat answered. “The sixty-meter-long truss successfully liberated itself from all its burdens and charged down at Mach 7. It was a spectacular sight. I believe that it could easily penetrate an Iowa-class battleship’s armor, and also skewer the Gerald R. Ford-class aircraft carrier in passing.”

…

“Tomcat, tell me honestly. Are those darn simulations ever going to succeed?” Tang Yue asked. “You told me previously that Orion II can descend vertically. Were you just bullsh*tting me?”

“Of course not.”

“Look me in the eye and say it again.” Tang Yue sat straight.

Tomcat stared at the monitor as its paws and slowly stopped. It fell silent for a second before turning its head.

“If I were to say that Orion II wouldn’t be able to descend at all, would you give up?”

Tang Yue was taken aback.

“No.”

“Then why ask such a question?” Tomcat folded its arms. “Orion II’s vertical descent is possible in theory. Do you know what it means by ‘in theory’? A high school student who fails all his subjects can, in theory, get accepted by Tsinghua University. It can happen as long as there are favorable conditions, with the entire world revolving around him. As long as he works hard enough, allowing his results to improve significantly, and that he happens to spot all the questions on the exam.”

Spot the questions on the National College Entrance Examination?

As someone who had been through the exam, Tomcat’s analogy was something Tang Yue was very familiar with.

The question setters of the China’s National College Entrance Examination claim: I’m not bragging, but if millions of you can spot our questions, count it as us losing.

“As long as Orion II doesn’t have any accidents during the landing—that the engine or the attitude control doesn’t malfunction, that the guidance system works normally, that the truss doesn’t suffer from excessive stress, that the seal of the lander’s docking mechanism remains intact, that the atmosphere doesn’t have any anomalies—and every detail perfectly matches our expectations, it will be able to land safely.”

“Do you believe what you just said?” Tang Yue asked.

“Yes,” Tomcat said indifferently. It didn’t show any expression, looking like it firmly believed in the fulfillment of everything it said.

It really believed that the Orion II spacecraft could land without any problems.

“Even if it’s a one in ten million chance of success, I’m still willing to believe in it,” Tomcat said. “I know you’re very worried, but we only have one path to take. We should be thankful that there’s a possibility of success. Think about it. If Orion II cannot even land in theory, what would you be doing now? Sitting there in despair? The fourth mock failed, but there’s the fifth mock. If the fifth mock fails, there’s still the sixth, seventh, eighth, and ninth mock! We can keep testing until it succeeds.”

Tang Yue suspected the veracity of Tomcat’s words, but he wasn’t able to verify if it was lying.

Perhaps Orion II just didn’t have any chance of landing successfully. The so-called “in theory” was something Tomcat had fabricated to fool laypeople like them. It was doing this to give them false hope before the comet arrived. It was to prevent Tang Yue and Mai Dong from falling into utter despair for the last few days of their lives.

If the cat was really acting, Tang Yue and Mai Dong definitely couldn’t tell.

Tomcat did have such motives. In a perilous situation, it was obligated to protect the safety of Tang Yue and Mai Dong.

“I guarantee you that before the comet hits Mars, I will definitely think of a way to get Miss Mai Dong down.”

Tang Yue observed Tomcat’s face. It was as calm and unperturbed as it usually was. To be honest, it was impossible to tell anything from the facial expressions of a robot cat, so Tang Yue had no idea how much of what Tomcat said was true.

Tang Yue sighed.

“Three mocks after the third mock. If this mocking continues, the comet will be hitting us in mockery, Boss.”

“You should have some confidence in me.” Tomcat patted itself on the chest. “I’ll be doing the fifth simulation in a while. Do you believe that I’ll definitely succeed this time?”

…

Five hours later.

“Failure is the mother of success.” Tomcat sat squarely and said in all seriousness.

“I told you during the ninth failure. The explosion was earlier than the previous ones.” Tang Yue curled his lips. “After failing so many times, is your success suffering a difficult labor?”

“Rest easy. I guarantee you that the next test will be a success.” Tomcat had originally planned on pledging its character as a cat, but recalled that it had used it in the previous simulation. The outcome—Orion II exploded seventy seconds after atmospheric entry.

“Mr. Cat, how confident are you that the next test will succeed?” Mai Dong asked.

“Miss Mai Dong, look out the window,” Tomcat said. “What do you see?”

“Mars.”

“That big.”