Code Zulu Alpha: Nerd in the Apocalypse!

Putting that thought aside for the moment because it wasn't exactly my business to begin with, it was now time to tie up some loose ends before we started going back on the road again. However, Edith requested a couple more days in preparation so it was just about enough time to figure out some things and manage things within my control.

As our little story time with Sebastian ended, we went back to our rooms but the first thing I did was ask Nancy for a pencil and some paper.

"O-Okay!"

"Thank you," I said as I waved her off.

It didn't take long before she came back with the items I asked for so while everyone else was busy doing their own thing, I decided to sketch the witch we met in the mountain to show it to Terry—the drunk dude at the party last time—tomorrow.

I figured it wouldn't hurt driving around the other estates the Rivas Family now had some ownership of, and meeting the same person without alcohol in his system had more merit compared to an overly honest drunk who'd tell you just about anything that comes to mind.

However, I didn't even notice that Nancy was watching me the whole time and she couldn't believe what I did on the piece of paper that she gave me.

"W-Whoa…" Nancy muttered while wide-eyed and fascinated.

"Ah—"

Then she looked up at me with puppy eyes, "C-C-Can you d-draw me too?!"

"Sure?"

"R-REALLY?!"

"Yeah?"

"Ah— A-Are you d-done with that though? I-I don't want to d-disturb—"

"Oh! D'you want me to draw you now? I can finish this one up later—"

"C-Can you do it in my n-notebook?! Please?"

"Okay, no problem with that—"

"YAY~! I-I WILL BE BACK! D-DON'T GO ANYWHERE!"

In any case, it seemed like Nancy was taking her time finding her notebook so I quickly finished my sketch—but with the commotion she made from seeing me draw, it attracted the attention of the ladies behind me who were trying on some make-up that surprisingly enough, was also made from the Rivas Family's products AND was a product line from Elsa herself who for some reason was present at the moment.

I was shocked to fuck, "W-What are you doing here?!"

She couldn't believe her ears, "Haah?! It's your room but this is still my home! Can't wait to have all these girls to yourself?!"

I chortled, "Don't change the subject! Again, why are you here and not at the opposite end of the mansion where Mauro's supposed to be pinning you to a wall or the ceiling?!"

"Ceiling? We could do that? I guess we can try—"

"Think, Elsa! Think! I was just trying to make a joke!"

"Ha-Ha. Funny! Do you know what's really funny though? It's bold of you to assume he does the fucking while I'm the one who does the actual heavy lifting from day one! Powerlifter my ass— what a joke!"

I shook my head as I chuckled, "Where is he anyway?"

She rolled her eyes as she huffed, "He took off with Logan the moment they heard there was this barn find in one—"

I cut in excitedly, "W-What did they find?!"

"MEN! Why are you all so excited about that?! Ugh— I do understand the reason but we should be busy doing our thing right about now!"

"Hey. I'm not an expert but sometimes, you two need to lay off for a bit so that the sperm count—"

"Hah! Don't tell me about his sperm count… You won't believe the amount he lets out every single time!"

I tried my best to get the picture of another guy ejaculating out of my head before I answered, "Trust me, I do know about that… If that's what we're talking about…"

"Huh?"

Then everyone else confirmed it for me, "He's not lying./ Correct./ It's true!/ Trust me, there's no way I'm not overflowing every time he cums in me…/ I can prove it to you?/ Tastes really good too, will re-order again, kek…"

I then waved them all off as flagged down Elsa, "Again, I'm not an expert but Mauro might've something called Hyperspermia. I'm not entirely sure about its causes but from what I've read, it could be from taking 'certain' medications, eating a lot of protein-rich foods, etc. but the two I've mentioned represent Mauro's case really well."

"So… You also have it?"

"Well~ I do have symptoms of it—as everyone else proved in this circle—but I'm not on the juice and I eat a very balanced diet. No infections in my prostate nor do I have pain, dizziness, or delays when I… you know, so chances are, I might just have both the volume and sperm count… And I've seen mine multiple times, it's still white in color— I'd hate to ask but—"

"Sometimes, it is, yes… W-What was it again? Hyperspermia?"

"Yeah—"

"Wait— If his condition's predisposed to release a lot of it, why am I still not pregnant?"

"That's the thing. Volume doesn't always mean high sperm count. A cotton candy might look like it's a lot but if you compare it to a jawbreaker with the same size… You get what I mean?"

"So… Can you tell me more about it?"

"Well~ I shouldn't be the one telling this to you because I'm not a doctor—"

"Just tell me!"

"Fine. There's a lower risk of pregnancy if you're with someone that has the condition and even if you do, there's a higher chance of having a miscarriage…" then I paused as I saw Elsa's face getting somber, "Hold on… Hold that tear, alright?"

"You just told me that I'm not gonna get pregnant! How's that—"

Kaley comforted her from the side, "Just listen to him for a bit, alright? He knows his stuff…"

"O-Okay…"

I cleared my throat before I continued, "Alright… What I've said is true but that doesn't mean the chances of you getting pregnant is zero. A doctor—which we have at home—can simply extract your eggs and Mauro's semen from his grande serving cup, fertilize it, then put it back to you, and voila! You're fucking pregnant! That's a sure-fire way to do it but if you wanna do it the old-fashioned way, you gotta lay off for at least a week before doing it again but do expect extra, extra servings because he'll be backed the fuck up… just saying… NNN works for some people but I straight-up almost died from that so I do the exact opposite of that…"

"W-What's NNN—"

'No-Nut November, Non-Stop Nut November is the way to go!'

I shook the thought from my head as I replied, "N-Not important, but anyway, don't get too mad when he gets back because if that barn find is actually gold, he'll definitely fuck you even if you tap out."

Elsa then let out a smile before she chuckled, "I'll be the judge of that! But yeah, thanks for the info. I guess we'll pay your place a visit too? When's the earliest we could come? I don't want to put all of the blame on him because there's also the chance that I could be the one at fault—"

"It's not anyone's fault, alright? But yeah, you can join us on the trip back and—"

Then Nancy finally came in with her notebook, "FOUND IT!!! H-Huh? What did I miss?"

Quinn answered, "Where were you? We just finished fucking and even Elsa joined us!"

"WHAT?! HOW LONG WAS I—"

"I'M JOKING! But we were just talking about semen. I didn't think I'd be this invested but care to weigh in?"

Nancy never looked so confused, "I-I-I was just about to g-get drawn… I don't… I-It's a g-good reward, I guess?"

"BAHAHAHA! I COULDN'T HAVE SAID IT BETTER MYSELF!"

I any case, it didn't take long before everyone remembered that I promised that I'd draw Nancy tonight but she was in tears because they dragged her a few feet away so she'd have proper make-up on for her portrait.

I tried to flag them down, "G-Guys… It's just a simple sketch—"

Elsa roared for the first time, "SHADDAP! SIMPLE SKETCH OR NOT, SHE NEEDS TO LOOK AT HER BEST!"

"I actually like her looking like—"

"LOOKING LIKE WHAT, HUH—"

Nancy managed to cut in, "Y-You can do m-my eyes b-but please don't cover my f-freckles! H-He said i-it looks cute so p-please leave them on!"

"Shi~ Are you sure, Nancy? I thought you hated them?"

"N-Not anymore, I guess? I stopped wearing contacts too—"

"Then that's great! We've been telling you a lot of times that you're pretty but all it takes is Mr. Lucky over there to convince you, huh?"

"I-I guess so? He's really nice but he's not as scary as Sebastian…"

I then cut in while making the room completely ice-cold, "Is that so? Challenge accepted."

"STOP! YOU DOOFUS!"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~!!!"

For the sake of brevity, let's just say I was beaten because of reading the room wrong and I discovered that their makeup also covered bruises really well…