Classless Reincarnation
29 I Like Sitting On My Ass!
"The Underground? Let's go!"
Jack's eagerness made poor Lizzy doubt her "choice" of following him. "Wait, wait! One does not simply walk into the Underground!" She interjected, all eyes turning to her.
"The Shops you need are constantly moving around to hide from the Dawn Guard. Not only that but there are always countless layers of passwords needed to access them too!"
So this was like a secret organization, eh? Talk about exclusive! Hearing this, Jack not only didn't back down, but a grin even found its way to his lips.
"I understand. Thanks, Lizzy!"
Then he left the place, happily whistling, taking everyone present by surprise. He wasn't insisting that she help some more? Was he giving up already? As soon as they left the shop…
"Kid, you should use that Lizzy girl! We can definitely use her as bait. She's an alchemist, after all. We can—" The ghost already had a superb plan in mind.
"No, thanks!" Jack instantly refused.
She wasn't just an alchemist to him but a key subordinate. She had saved him from turning into a fox after all. He wouldn't throw her away, and he'd get her to follow him willingly.
"Say, old ghost. As an archmage, you should be pretty knowledgeable, right? You should also be able to resist magical scrutiny, right?"
"Kid, are you trying to insult me? Of course, I can and am!"
"Good! That will come in handy."
Jack then sent his foxes to get loot. Except, it was all worthless things that made his mentor raise a ghostly brow. Cloth, chairs, table, crystal ball… what for?!
Then he picked the most expressive fox for a special mission.
"Tell me, are you ready to become a legend?"
"Woo?! Woo!" (Legend?! Awesome!)
Thus began yet another training round, Jack teaching his "pupil" strange gestures. But the more the ghost saw, the more confused he became. Those were 100% useless!
Before long, the fox army was all back. Jack (disguised) grabbed everything they handed him and set up shop on a random street with plenty of temporary stalls!
In a matter of seconds, he had erected a small tent.
| Mister Immortal Divination! |
This looked… so bad!
Were it not for the sign, anyone would have simply assumed that a homeless dude lived there! There was also an enormous sense of disharmony to it.
Just the tent's exterior alone was an offense to the eyes. The foxes had brought enough cloth, but none of it matched! It was an explosion of colors.
"Kid, have you gone insane?" The ghost whispered as he hid his body from the gathering crowd. The people were already sneering, some even spitting in disgust.
But would Jack let something so trivial affect him? Nope! He added the latest and final touch before bringing his fox representative inside to sit still in the dark… and wait!
Outside, a few had gathered…
| Ask a Question: 10 G | Get an Answer: 20 G | Receive a Suggestion: 30 G |
They were now looking at the "Divination Tent" price chart, outrage coursing through them. What the fuck was with those prices?!
"10 gold to ask a question?! That's the price of a Life-Saving potion! Is this guy crazy or crazy?!" A man asked, baffled.
"Not just that… but that's just for the question, not the answer! There's definitely something wrong with this guy's head!"
"Hey, you asshole, come on out! Who are you trying to fool? Do you think the people of Dawn are retarded?! Come out, you wanna-be scammer!"
Inside the tent, a certain ghost mage was turning transparent. Never had he been so embarrassed! "Hey, kid, what are we doing here seriously?! This idea's horrible!"
"Oh? Do you think so? I'll take note for the future." Jack nodded, not showing any trace of shame whatsoever. He wasn't fazed in the least by the insults either.
This pricing style had been made precisely for people to gawk at it in wonder. After all, there was no such thing as bad publicity! It was a good start, but… "Do it."
The tent's entrance suddenly flopped open just as the crowd was getting heated. Then appeared a colorfully-dressed fortune-teller (fox), its features hidden.
Oh? Many watched the scene with expectation. Would he try to defend himself? Recoil in shame and flee, perhaps? But they had underestimated the man's shamelessness.
He actually modified his sign!
| Loiter: 5 G | Ask a Question.… |
Loiter 5 Gold?! This guy was the epitome of insane!
"Hoy', do you think this street belongs to you?! I'll stand here if I bloody want, and there's nothing you can do about it!" Someone instantly protested.
There really was nothing Jack or his foxes could do about it, nor did he ever expect this to work. This was just to have them make some noise.
Instantly, a rumor began about the shameless new "Divination Scammer!" Barely a few minutes later, all the surrounding streets knew about it!
Many came to witness this sight, even a soldier from the Dawn Guard! He entered the tent to check that they had the authorization to be there.
As Jack saw the soldier enter…
"Old Ghost, now's your turn! Mind magic, fry his brain!"
The poor soldier never stood a chance. Yet, as he left the tent, he seemed… happier?! After partially erasing his memory, the old ghost reluctantly gave him a few magical tips.
The poor soldier left the tent glowing.
"Everyone, stop clamoring! The loitering fee is too far-fetched, but everything else is in order. Want to use the master's services? Cough up the coins!"
W-what?! What the heck was up with this?! Even the soldier said it was fine?! Could he have been tricked? Or perhaps was there more than meets the eye to this shoddy tent?!
Instantly, the crowd was energized, some brave men even volunteering to test the waters. "So what if it's 10 G? I can afford that much: out of the way y'all!"
Customer after customer began entering the tent.
Each would be welcomed by mystical gestures made by the fortune-telling fox. That's when they knew that guy was the real deal! He looked so freaking mysterious!
Little did they know that it was gestures Jack had copied from an amazing Scammer from his past life. The guy had cheated Awakened… but it seemed to work on mages too!
That would put them in a receptive mood. Then, he'd quickly read them to guess their problems. Afterward, it was the old ghost's time to intervene and give (accurate) advice!
As for all the nonsensical questions about love and whatnot, Jack would give equally nonsensical answers that were vague enough to appear profound.
The best thing was that every repetition would make them 30-60 gold richer, the coins pilling up like a small mountain near them! Was this the feeling of success? Yes, yes it was!
They could even hear people outside making a ruckus.
"I'm telling you, it's like he could read my thoughts! He's no joke! Heck, I think he's as good at divination as he's bad at business!"
"Eh, I still think the whole thing's a scam! There's no way that—"
"Good. You should leave! I can take your spot, right?"
"Never mind… I'll try it!"
Every time Jack heard them bicker, he'd grin. But just as he was happily reveling in their success, the Old Ghost really couldn't take it anymore:
"What's the point of this all? You're basically just selling my knowledge at a discount! This is utterly ridiculous! What happened to locating the Underground?!"
"Hehe, is that so? Then tell me, old ghost, how do you think we can find our target?"
"Tch— We can either go to them or let them come to us! Then we—"
"Hehe, let me stop you there. There's one more option…."
Jack retorted but stopped just as a new customer entered their tent. The latter seemed suspicious of them, almost about to jump at their throats, yet he was still here.
"So you're that Diviner that—"
"You're not here for yourself. In fact, you think this is a huge scam, but you're so desperate for him…no, her that you still came. Ah, but you're right… this IS a scam."
The fox went through the motion, yet the confident voice belonged to Jack. Had he just admitted to his customer that this was a scam?! The guy was already trembling in…
"I'M SORRY! Please forgive me—!" At this moment, he hated himself so much! Why hadn't he shown more respect from the beginning?!
Meanwhile, Jack was laughing inwardly… tricked another! He had even gotten the gender wrong but corrected it instantly after seeing the guy's body language. Yep, all guesswork!
The Old Ghost quickly gave a few tips to resolve the man's problem. It was something about his sister harmed by an old, incomplete magical technique. But right before the customer left...
"Actually, I'm in a good mood. Here's a freebie: Underground Market." Jack meaningfully added, the man bowing deeply as thanks.
He wanted to ask more, but the "Diviner" was already shooing him away. Underground Market, was it? He'd help his sister... but then he'd check the place out no matter what!
Back in the tent, Jack gestured to one of his foxes.
"Follow him, will you? Be discrete!"
The old ghost gulped hard.
"Why search or bait when you can trick people into doing it for you? Besides, I quite like making gold while sitting on my ass." Jack casually remarked, looking hella smug.
But just as he was showing a shit-eating grin, a commotion happened:
"HOW DARE YOU! Divination isn't something to parade around for a few measly coins! Come on out, you blasphemer!" Jack's Danger Sense was already blowing up!
Damn.... what now?!
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