i'm not a bad man

Chapter 598 The romance of a bouquet of flowers

I can't remember how long ago I told Qiao Jiao that "music is the best cure in the world", but this is indeed a very important insight in my life; therefore, when I feel that life is difficult, I I will be addicted to music, and the result of addiction is mastery, so mainstream instruments are my specialty.

However, I haven’t played the saxophone for a long time. I find it inconvenient to carry, and my RV is small, so the guitar that accompanies me most is the guitar. But it doesn’t matter. Even if I haven’t played it for so many years, I am still proficient in playing the saxophone. Some songs, I don’t even need sheet music. Regarding music, I am like a storage machine. As long as I live, those melodies will always be in my heart.

But, will Qiao Jiao really admire my musical talent like others?

In my memory, she is not a person who particularly likes music, but online games are her favorite.

Maybe it doesn't matter whether she really likes music or not. What's important is that she wants to save me, on top of this tall building, facing the rain and the blurred lights of the city...

I have always felt that people are products of the environment. In such an environment, even if there is no way to achieve inner salvation, at least my heart is soft... because she finally came back to me, even if I didn't have a relationship with her She talks a lot, but as long as I close my eyes, I can feel her breath, mixed with the smell of rain, as if to nourish the dead wood in my heart...

For the first time, I felt that I actually liked her so much...I liked her so much that it was like a flower blooming in my heart. This flower may be red or white, but it doesn't matter. As long as it blooms, it will be fragrant. .

……

I opened my eyes, took a deep breath, and finally asked her, "What music do you want to listen to?"

"I really have a song in my heart that I want to listen to..." After a pause, Qiao Jiao added, "EndOfTheNight... I think it's very suitable for city nights..."

"EndOfTheNight?"

I searched the music library in my mind, then tried to play the intro for Qiao Jiao, and asked, "Is this it?"

Qiao Jiao looked at me...

"Not this one?"

"It's this one..."

"Then keep quiet!"

"I'm surprised. This song is very popular. I thought you wanted to read the simplified music score..."

I smiled and replied: "For more than a year, I would spend five hours a day listening to music. When I encountered something good, I would keep the music in my heart. As long as there was a music, I could pick up the score... …”

After saying that, I started to play this niche piece that Qiao Jiao said from memory. At first, I had to pick up the score, and the performance was inevitably a bit stiff, but after one play, I could already do it fluently, so, I quickly immersed myself in the pleasure brought by the melody...

In my senses, this city shrouded in darkness has gradually undergone some changes. Those yellowed street lamps are like turning into a piece of oil paper at dusk and falling apart on the wet streets. When the wind blows, the dusk The essence of it, like the butter in the bread, leaked out under the countless wheels passing by on the ground, and also rose into my heart. My spirit seemed to have climaxed...a burst of joy, a burst of loneliness, a burst of emptiness, and another. Fills up instantly...

So, it wasn't until the end that I opened my eyes and looked at Qiao Jiao standing next to me. She still had her eyes closed, and the rain had wet her hair. Her body seemed to be imprisoned, but her spirit was acting out of control. Jumping...so that the moment I put down the saxophone, she hugged me tightly...

I was caught off guard and hugged her with my hands hanging. I didn't hug her as tightly as she did, but I gently touched her back, for fear that the flower would bloom and then wither...

"Asshole, do you still say you are trash?...How can a trash bring a person's emotions to hell and to heaven? How can a trash make a person feel so hateful for a second? I'll kill you, and the next second I'll want to spend the night with you... in bed with you."

My heart was beating wildly, but Qiao Jiao hugged me tighter. She choked and said: "But we have never done anything. We are more like friends, the kind that you can take control of. I am willing to die for you." , you may be willing to die for me, but you just can't live together, sleep in the same bed, have our children, fight for a goal together, let alone live, old, sick, and die, even the ashes have to be mixed together... …I admit, when I listened to you playing Sakas, this was what I was thinking about…I was filled with aftertaste, but the moment I hugged you, I was left with only regret!”

After saying that, Qiao Jiao pushed me away hard. She seemed to have used all her strength. My back hit the guardrail of the high-rise building. There was a burst of pain. I finally felt the pain and was no longer so numb.

I don't want to agree with what she said, but what she said is true, not only her, but also Lu Xi...

Recently, when I think of them, I always feel like I have to take the first step, because as much as a person wants to do something, he has to pay a huge price; therefore, if I dare to kill Guan Yubo, I probably won’t be able to do it myself. What will happen?

I finally endured the pain of the impact and said to Qiao Jiao: "Don't talk about dying, you all have to live well."

"how about you?"

"I!?"

My tone was very serious, but the next second I said in a very soft voice: "I am not afraid of death. I stopped being afraid of death a long time ago... However, I have a little romance in my heart. I hope that after I die, I can be buried in A place with mountains and water should also be open... I like dusk. If it is an open place, the light of dusk can shine on my tombstone... In my life, I have always been anxious and unhappy. Only the light of dusk is the laziest, so I would stand up to the light of dusk and lazily watch others being anxious and unhappy... No, I still hope that others can live a happier life, because in this world It’s really not easy to live once…”

"Have you said enough?"

I was a little surprised... Of course I didn't say enough. I really thought a lot about death. I thought that people would disappear completely due to death; I also thought that people might not disappear and that I would stay in this world. A period of time, and then reincarnation again, anxiety again, pain again, everything has no end...

But Qiao Jiao had already pulled me and ran towards the safe passage leading to the elevator.

"The saxophone hasn't been picked up yet..."

"You are a person who doesn't want to live a good life every day, why do you care about the saxophone!" Follow my Weixin public account: *** to view the latest chapters!Reply to "works" to get all book txts.

……

The scene changed. When I stopped again, Qiao Jiao and I were already standing at the door of a flower shop. Qiao Jiao chose a bouquet of flowers, handed it to me, and said, "I don't know what you think about death." The thing about this... Before you die, I'll give you a bouquet of flowers... I once heard someone say that the first time a man receives flowers is next to his own tombstone... I don't want you to be like this ...I don’t want your life to be all pain and regret...I want to tell you even more...even if you really die, I will not give up on you...I will give you a bouquet of flowers first, and when you really die, As you wish, I will find you a place... find a place with mountains, water and open space, where you can watch the dusk and be lazy..."

(End of this chapter)