i'm not a bad man

Chapter 55 Lu Xi’s people
I very much agree with Tu Lin's thinking and appreciate his flexible spirit, but I need him to give me a clearer explanation about being a woman, because it is divided into two types of changes: mental and physical. If he If he just wants to be a woman mentally, there is still some executability; if he wants to go all the way and directly become a woman physically, then this is a bit ridiculous and the risk is extremely high. If he wants to After changing gender, Qiao Jiao still didn't have that feeling for him. Wasn't that all her sacrifice in vain?
As I thought about it, I burst out laughing, because I already had the picture in my mind of Tu Lin's sex change, but failed to get Qiao Jiao; in the end, a 1.8-meter-[-]-meter woman sat alone on the beach, thinking of her ridiculous behavior , drinking and crying sadly; then, an innocent child came to the beach and tried to comfort her: Auntie, why are you crying so sadly?Tu Lin replied bitterly: Who the hell is aunt? Call me uncle.

I couldn't control it anymore and laughed loudly: "Haha..."

Qiao Jiao was so angry that she slammed the table and shouted at me: "Are you mentally ill? Do you really like to base your happiness on other people's pain?"

This time, I couldn't hold it in any longer. Even though I tried hard, I couldn't stop laughing. Qiao Jiao's anger level also reached its peak at this time. She picked up the unfinished red wine on the table, He raised his hand and splashed it on my face.

I was completely poisoned by laughter. Even so, I still wiped my face and smiled... If I wasn't afraid that Qiao Jiao would kill me, I could at least laugh for a cigarette.

I finally stopped, and then forced myself not to think about anything related to Tu Lin, and then I said: "Sister Jiao, I am really not laughing at you for liking Sister Lu. Being gay is not uncommon. , I also recently watched a movie with this theme, starring Leslie Cheung and Tony Leung... As long as a relationship can be interpreted deeply and movingly, whether it is a man or a woman, it is worthy of the audience's aftertaste and thinking... So, if it extends to you and Lu Xi, I really can probably understand.”

"Then what are you laughing at?"

I punched my chest with my fist, and after making sure I could hold it back, I replied: "My friend probably fell in love with you at first sight, but he knew that he couldn't change your sexual orientation, so he found another way and said that he would I turn into a woman and let you be a man to please you!"

God knows what kind of suffering I suffered before I could say this sentence completely. After I finished saying it, I couldn't hold it in any longer, so I burst out laughing again.

Qiao Jiao had a disgusted expression on her face and said after a while: "Even if all the women in the world are dead, I still won't like the woman he has become. Don't be disgusted with me."

I couldn't hold it in anymore, because after Qiao Jiao gave the answer, the scene I imagined seemed to be right in front of me...

For the first time in my life, I felt tired from laughing too much; at this moment, I was even a little grateful to Qiao Jiao and Tu Lin. If it weren't for their joint efforts, I wouldn't have known that a person could be so happy.

happy!I couldn't help but pick up another unfinished glass of red wine on the table and drink it all in one gulp.

……

"Han Chao, you don't have to be too proud, and you don't have to come to talk to me with the attitude of watching a joke... I know that you have thoughts about Lu Xi, but your results will not be any better than mine, because I I know Lu Xi so well that no one in this world can get into her heart. Therefore, she and I have been best friends for almost 20 years, but I don’t dare to reveal my feelings to her, and have kept this feeling hidden until today... ...She is just a heartless woman. Believe it or not, she must have found a place to sleep now. She doesn’t care about my mood at all.”

I don’t know why Qiao Jiao suddenly mentioned this to me. At this moment, I put away the smile in my heart, and then looked at her with a puzzled look. She would not comment like this for no reason. Lu Xi, it must be because he got such feelings from certain events.

No matter what purpose she had in telling me this, it was an excellent opportunity for me to get to know Luxi, so I calmed down and wanted to listen to what she had to say.

Before Qiao Jiao spoke, I took out my phone and looked at it again.After I told Lu Xi that Qiao Jiao was fine here, she didn't reply to the message. She was probably asleep. From this, Qiao Jiao's evaluation of her still had some credibility.

Qiao Jiao finally spoke again: "Honestly, are you interested in Lu Xi?"

"You like her as a woman, let alone me as a man."

Qiao Jiao gave me a fierce roll of the eyes and replied: "Don't think that because you have a gender advantage, everything will be fine... From junior high school to her work, there have been many men who like her, but she has never accepted any man... ...It is precisely because of this that I had the illusion that she, like me, also likes women...until today I discovered that she neither likes men nor women...she is an emotionally unstable person , don’t know what love is at all, and don’t need love.” “Is this your evaluation of her after being with her for 20 years?”

"If you don't believe it, you can try... Don't say I didn't remind you. Before you, there was a friend who chased her for three years and gave her everything, but she remained indifferent. In the end, she actually let this friend in After being on the blacklist, this friend developed depression, and until now, he still has to rely on medication to maintain treatment."

I laughed: "You tell me this just because you want me to give up. This kind of routine is so unoriginal."

Qiao Jiao didn't want to talk nonsense with me, and directly took her mobile phone, then opened WeChat, found the man's circle of friends, and finally showed it in front of me...

I probably glanced at it a few times, all expressing my pain about not getting Lu Xi and my fear of depression.

I couldn't help but not believe it, so I fell into silence. After a long time, I opened my mouth and said to Qiao Jiao: "As long as a person is alive, it is impossible not to have emotional needs. I think you still don't understand Lu Xi well enough... If If she doesn't have emotional needs, she won't be so obsessed with Jay Chou's music. You have to know that music is a way to express emotions and also entrusts certain emotional needs... I have played music before, so I understand the feeling. , really similar to the desire for love.”

"She likes Jay Chou's music? Is she still obsessed with it?"

Looking at Qiao Jiao's unbelievable look, I couldn't help but feel puzzled, and then asked: "You don't know she likes Jay Chou's music?"

"do not know."

"In order to find a set of Jay Chou's vinyl records, she often went to second-hand trading websites to hunt for goods... It was because I had such a set of vinyl records that we became friends... You made love to her quickly How is it possible that a friend of 20 years doesn’t even know this?”

Qiao Jiao shook her head again, and then fell into confusion, as if she was questioning herself.

"So, it is impossible for one person to completely understand another person. Even if you have known each other for 20 years, there will be a blank space in the middle... Maybe when you accidentally ignore it, she is no longer the Lu Xi you know. .”

Qiao Jiao had a look of reminiscence on her face, and after a moment, she suddenly said: "To be honest, there was a gap period between us since we met, and we didn't contact each other for almost two years."

I waited for Qiao Jiao to continue. She lit a cigarette, calmed down, and then said: "That was when we were in the second grade of junior high school. Her father brought her to Shenyang because of a job transfer... At that time, they She left quietly. I inquired for a long time, but could not find out her whereabouts. I thought I would never see her again in this life. Two years later, when we were in high school, she followed her parents back home. She went to Qingdao... But after she came back, her personality was different from before. She became a little cold and never told me what was in her heart."

"Yeah, you don't even know what happened to her in those two years. Why do you say that you understand her and that she has no emotional needs?"

Qiao Jiao looked at me and then fell into silence; I also had some subtle changes in my heart at this time. This was really a wonderful night. I was actually trying to piece together a relationship with a woman who could be called a love rival. Life in Deer Creek.

Through my information, Qiao Jiao learned about the fact that Lu Xi likes Jay Chou's music. Through her words, I also learned that Lu Xi is very indifferent to feelings. As a result, Lu Xi's image in my heart gradually became three-dimensional. Unfortunately, , but in the end it cannot be complete, because neither I nor Qiao Jiao know what happened to Lu Xi in those two years. The only thing that is certain is that the experience of those two years led to the development of her personality. There were big changes. Maybe it was at that time that she started to like Jay Chou's music...

I had a hunch that my crisis did not lie with Qiao Jiao in front of me, but with the unknown two years in Luxi. Qiao Jiao seemed to have the same feeling. She put out the cigarette in her hand and lit it again with great concern. One.

(End of this chapter)