i'm not a bad man

Chapter 396 Am I really that good?
Qiao Jiao's phone number was connected, but there was no answer. Considering that there was more than ten hours of time difference between us, she probably hadn't woken up yet, so I didn't call her again, but just waited. Waiting for her call back.

It seems to be raining outside the window. At first there is the sound of small raindrops, and after a while it becomes very dense. Compared with the snow in the small town, this is a rainy place. Even in dry winter, it will rain continuously. Up and down for several days.

I just lay on the bed, listening to the sound of rain falling on the ground immersed in it. I am not a person who likes rain very much, but if I can lie on a comfortable and warm bed, I am not so repelled. At most, I just feel a little Boring; so, every rainy night, I hope there is someone around me who can talk to relieve my boredom.

This is also the reason why it is difficult for me to live alone. I don’t know if it is my illusion, but I always feel that there has been a lot of rain in the past two years. Especially when I was in Qingdao, there was an extreme month when it rained continuously. A month, so sometimes when I recall those nights related to Qingdao, they are always accompanied by loneliness or wanton entertainment.

Probably because of too much rain, I fell in love with bars, because there, it was always easy to find a woman who was willing to accompany me to have fun on a rainy night.

It's a pastime, but for me, it was always a less glorious life, so I don't miss it too much.

……

Because I was bored, I simply sat up and looked around at the room, which was only about ten square meters. Compared with a few years ago, this room had not changed at all. I just moved the desk from the wall to the window, and then changed it. It was difficult for me to feel fresh because of these two changes, and I inevitably fell into boredom again, until my eyes once again glanced at the newspaper I used to cover my smiling face...

This is a newspaper from March 2008. In the most eye-catching position, it says that the NBA Rockets, composed of two stars, Yao Ming and McGrady, won a history-making 3-game winning streak; but my emotions were not affected. Affected by these 22 consecutive victories, I am more concerned about the year 22, because I have been to Wenchuan and seen the earthquake ruins; based on the time in the newspaper, there will be a world-shaking earthquake in more than two months. Big earthquake.

This great earthquake changed the fate of countless people, and many people were destroyed and displaced. If I could travel through the time on the paper, would it change this history?

At least tell the people there that on May 5.12, you must take refuge in an open place. Maybe you can save countless families and change the fate of countless people.

I admit that this is a bit naive, but in Xiangxi, a land that has its own sense of mystery, I still have some fantasies about science fiction events that I know are impossible to come true; you know, when Lao San and I were drinking just now, he also He talked to me about dream control and taught me some methods to control dreams. This is undoubtedly a psychological suggestion for me. I always feel that there are some opportunities in this world that can transcend science and transcend space. and time restrictions.

I lit a cigarette and recalled in my mind how to control dreams. I thought I would try it tonight. It would be a comfort to be able to return to 2008 in my dreams.

Just when I was immersed in it, my phone suddenly vibrated. It was Qiao Jiao's voice call back to me.

I hurriedly answered the call. Although I had a clear purpose for calling her before, I suddenly fell into silence the moment I connected. Instead, it was Qiao Jiao on the other end of the phone who spoke first: "You just called me. Is there a phone call?”

"Ah."

"I just woke up. I slept too late last night." After a pause, Qiao Jiao asked again: "Didn't I agree not to contact you again?"

"Lu Xi has left, which means the agreement has been terminated."

"she left!?"

"I'll leave at noon today."

Qiao Jiao fell into silence on the other end of the phone. After a long time, she replied: "I thought she would spend the New Year there before leaving... It seems that I still don't know her well enough... Maybe she just wants to clear her conscience. "

No one can guess what Lu Xi was thinking, so I couldn't respond to Qiao Jiao's words.

"Didn't you keep her when she left?"

"No, I just sent her down the mountain."

"Do you dare to be more specific about the scene of your separation?"

"What's wrong with that?" I responded, then squinted my eyes and took a deep drag on the cigarette before speaking again: "When she was leaving, she asked me to drive her down the mountain on my godfather's tractor. .”

Qiao smiled delicately: "It's quite romantic... suddenly it feels like a picture!"

"Since when can tractors be associated with romance?"

Qiao Jiao asked, "Have you ever seen a tractor in the city?"

"never seen it."

"So isn't this romantic enough? Even in big cities like BJ, Shanghai, Guangzhou and Shenzhen, no one can do this... When something is unique, it is romantic."

"What you said is really fresh." After a pause, I added: "If you like tractors so much, when you come to Hunan next time, I will drive my godfather's tractor and pull you to do farm work every day... …”

"No, in your case, this matter has lost its uniqueness."

"Riding a tractor has lost its uniqueness, but doing farm work has not... You have to know that no matter which big city you are in, doing farm work is something that cannot be achieved."

"Okay, Han Chao...let Lu Xi ride the tractor and let me do the farm work."

"Aren't we talking about uniqueness now?"

"Even if it's uniqueness, it still has the possibility of favoring one over the other, you damn scumbag..."

Although Qiao Jiao was scolding me, I didn't hear any sign of anger in her tone. I suddenly understood that maybe she wanted to use this method to ease this embarrassing situation for the three of us. , after all, everyone knows that Lu Xi is her best friend who has been with her for nearly 20 years.

At this time, Qiao Jiao lowered her voice and said to me: "Damn scumbag... you know... when I decided not to contact you, I was already mentally prepared to lose everything, because I felt As long as Lu Xi goes to Hunan to find you, you have no reason to give up on her... How can it be so easy to give up if you like someone, and I just gave you more companionship that she couldn't give... When she even gives you companionship You, you really have no reason to reject her... So, can you tell me what's on your mind?... Why did you let her go?... Letting her go means you chose me. Am I right?"

Qiao Jiao's words reminded me of my mood when I parted from Lu Xi. This mood was not vague, but when I really wanted to express it in words, I fell into a state of being at a loss for words...

After a long time, I spoke: "If you let me choose [-] times, I will still choose you..."

"Remember what you said now."

"In another 1 years, I will still choose you."

"Am I really that good?"

"I really do... Jiaojiao, you are the woman I don't want to give up no matter what. I have a lot of fantasies about being with you. These fantasies have no shelf life and no end... So, I want to be with you now. Meet each other, and then turn these fantasies into reality bit by bit, until the moment our lives end..."

Qiao Jiao on the other end of the phone suddenly fell into silence, which made me a little panicked, so I asked tentatively: "Is it too gross?"

Qiao Jiao choked up: "It's not stupid... If you still have more, say more and put together a basket. No, a basket is too small. I want to turn the sea into a container. All the sea water is yours." sweet Nothing."

(End of this chapter)