i'm not a bad man

Chapter 14 Sister 1
After waiting for a while, Ren Ran answered my call. She seemed to have drunk a lot of wine, so when she spoke, her voice was obviously a little floaty: "Call me so late, do you miss me?"

"Sister, can we meet? Right now."

The person on the other end of the phone was stunned for a moment, then suddenly laughed: "You still haven't learned your lesson... Aren't you afraid that my husband will come to find you?"

"I'm not afraid, I just want to chat with you..."

"Uh... we've known each other for a year and a half... I've never seen you seriously say who you want to chat with... are you really the Korean Chao I know?"

I smiled and replied: "In the past, it was Han Chao who made you happy... So, you think Han Chao has no pain... In fact, I am also in pain and sad... When I am in pain, it is really painful and sad. It was also really sad at times.”

Ren Ran's tone was a bit concerned: "What's wrong with you?...Actually, when you were looking for Xiaowei in the bar, I felt something was wrong with you...At that time, you ran too fast, and I followed behind , even failed to catch up with you..."

"Let's talk when we meet... Where are you? I'll find you."

"I'm drinking with Xiaowei and the others... It's better for me to go find you, so that you don't have to meet Xiaowei and the two of them can't talk properly."

"Well, I'm here at May Fourth Square."

"Wait for me for 10 minutes."

……

After finishing the call with Ren Ran, I lit up a cigarette. After taking a few deep puffs, I focused on the big box. There was money left by Lu Xi before he left... …

If it wasn't sympathy or pity, there was no need for her to keep it, because I had planned to give this vinyl record player to her for free. Based on this original intention, I opened the website for buying and selling second-hand items again, and then gave it to Lu Xi He replied to the message: "That record player is worthless, I am going to give it to you... If you really think I am an unlucky guy, take pity on me... It would be better for you to treat me to a meal and drink than to give me money." Comforting…”

After sending this message, I walked over to the big box and took a look inside under the light of the street lamp. There was actually a thick wad of cash inside. Although I couldn’t tell the exact number, judging from the thickness, she He probably left me all the money he originally spent on vinyl records.

No wonder celebrities are said to be high-income earners, and they are so generous even in giving alms!

In a daze, Lu Xi texted back: "You may think this record player has no value...but in my eyes, I think it has value..."

"What's the value of it? I bought it second-hand from Xianyu... If you insist on saying it's valuable, it's only 200 yuan, which is not enough to go to a bar and buy a dozen beers."

"But it has accompanied you to many places. Maybe there are deserts, seas, grasslands, and hillsides full of flowers along the way... When you look at these scenery, it plays Jay Chou's songs for you... …Isn’t the spiritual enjoyment it brings you inferior to a dozen beers in a bar?”

When I felt so uncomfortable before, I didn't even have the slightest urge to cry, but now, my eyes felt a little warm.She is right, if there is still happiness in my life, it must be immersed in the scene she described...

How wonderful!Driving my beloved RV, listening to my favorite songs, traveling through the ever-changing scenery, the singing is a kind of protection. I hide inside, forgetting all the worries and dangers, and all I can see is what is about to fall. The setting sun and the wheat waves swaying in the wind.

If there is no urgent need to eat, if the car can run without gasoline... If there is such a road that does not charge a toll and can go smoothly, I still want to be on the road... I don't want to stop.

Stopping is for money and survival. This is what makes me feel helpless the most.

Sighing softly, I finally sent a message back to Lu Xi: "When you put it this way, this record player is really like an old friend of mine. If it were alive... I suddenly felt a little reluctant to part with it, but now I feel more like it." I need money... I can only ask you to be nicer to this old friend of mine."

After sending this message, I bent down and took out the money Lu Xi had left in the box. The money was heavy on my hands, which made me unable to accept it calmly. I had to do something for Lu Xi...

But Lu Xi didn't seem to ask for anything in return. She didn't reply to my messages. So, I was immersed in the night and completely cut off from the world.

This state lasted for about 10 minutes until Ren Ran came.

……

Ren Ran came by taxi, and I saw a taxi parked on the roadside from a distance, with the lights on, and Ren Ran was paying the taxi driver... Then, she got out of the car and stood in May Fourth Square. The person across the street looked in my direction.

I don’t know why, but when I see Ren Ran, I feel a sense of security in my heart. Maybe it’s because she is older than me, or maybe, when we are together, she never needs me to spend a penny, she has a A magical card with endless money in it. It was only recently that I learned that she had exchanged her youth and dignity for this card.

……

Ren Ran is so beautiful, just like a white rose blooming in the dark night, and I am a lonely watcher. I am waiting for her, and I am also waiting for that glimmer of hope...

"Sister, this way."

Ren Ran looked over here looking for the sound. When he found me, a smile appeared on his face and he walked over quickly...

We faced each other in the dark night, and after being silent for a while, she asked me first: "Why did you come to May Fourth Square alone?"

"It's a long story." Ren Ran straightened his hair that was messed up by the sea breeze and said with a smile, "Then please speak slowly. I have plenty of time to listen to you."

I don’t know what happened, but I had a lot of things to say, but when I really had the chance to talk, I didn’t know where to start. So, I just watched Ren Ran, but my thoughts were not calm... …

At this time, Ren Ran turned around and looked again, and found that the RV was parked not far away, and said in surprise: "Don't your RV never move, why is it parked here?"

"I really haven't moved anywhere before. Now I'm thinking of leaving..."

"Then why didn't you leave?"

Facing Ren Ran, I finally said truthfully: "Yesterday, when I was on the road, a friend called me and said that he was in trouble and wanted to borrow money... so I gave him all the money I had."

"So, you ran out of travel expenses, and then went to the bar to find Xiaowei to get back the things you gave her?"

"That's the right order."

Ren Ran had a dumbfounded expression on his face: "You are really weird. If you don't have money, you can just ask and borrow it. How can you give something away and still want to get it back?"

"Borrowing money is a favor. When there is a favor, there is concern. When there is concern, you can't travel lightly... It's better to get back what you gave away. At most, you will be looked down upon by others, but there is no burden in your heart..."

"Are you so afraid of human relationships?..." After a short pause, Ren Ran said with some doubts: "We have known each other for almost a year and a half. There are so many friends in the bar, but it feels like you don't get along with anyone. "

"Because I never thought about staying here...so the friends I met in the bar are just passers-by."

"Then me too?"

After saying that, Ren Ran looked at me. She wanted to get a different answer from me, but on such a sentimental night, I couldn't deceive her, so I nodded and lit a cigarette at the same time.

Ren Ran smiled: "No wonder you are so bold that you dare to sleep with me... To put it bluntly, you are just relying on yourself that you won't stay here. If something really happens, you can pick up your pants and leave at worst."

I was a little speechless, and after a while I said, "You were the one who seduced me first."

"I was acting."

"I didn't know you were acting."

"Look at you looking like a scoundrel...forget it, no one will mention this matter in the future...let's talk about you borrowing money. Who did you lend the money to? Is it a friend we play with?"

"Those fair-weather friends we hang out with won't lend it to me... You have much more money than me. If they want to borrow something, they will come to you first."

"Do you have other friends in Qingdao?"

"Yes, you have met him once...do you remember? About half a year ago, I took him to the bar. He didn't say much during the whole meeting, and finally went to settle the bill."

Ren Ran thought for a while and replied: "I have an impression... is he the one you met at the construction site?"

"Ah."

"What's up with him?"

I took a deep breath from the cigarette, and after a while of silence, I replied: "His wife was born prematurely and had a caesarean section in the hospital. He had no money to pay for the surgery."

"That's not true. There are still people like this these days."

"You have been in your comfort zone for too long and don't know the sufferings of the world!" After a pause, I added: "He is a very hard-working person. He has saved some money in the past few years in Qingdao. , but...his father was recently diagnosed with sepsis, and he spent all his savings to treat his father...just in time, his wife was born prematurely...so he was forced to have no other choice."

Ren Ran nodded, and then looked at me with a strange look. After a while of pondering, she sighed: "Actually, you are quite kind...but why does everyone think you are a bad person?"

"I don't give a damn what other people think."

Ren Ran smiled, and then said seriously: "You don't care about other people's opinions, but we are really curious... Is there really such a person who can live his own way? Ordinarily, at your age, you should be When you are working hard in society... do you really not want to have a career of your own and a stable family?... And your parents, don't they care about you? Don't they have any expectations for you? "

When Ren Ran talked about my parents, my mood suddenly dropped, and then I remembered that unbearable past, and a burst of heart-breaking pain arose.

(End of this chapter)