I became auspicious

Under the bright palace lantern, I looked at Zhao Jihuan seriously. His expression did not change, with a smile in his eyes, and asked:"Why? Is it because of the good concubine?" I nodded and said helplessly:"It's not just her, you There will be many other concubines in the future. I find that I can't accept it, while the relationship is not deep enough, or else..."Zhao Jihuan sighed softly, a trace of depth flashed in his eyes.

He put down his chopsticks, turned around, held my face in his hands, looked at me seriously, and said,"You look at me for ten seconds. If you can do it, I agree." I felt the slightest movement on his fingertips. Cool, my heart trembled slightly. I broke free from his hand, stood up, and stayed away from him. My voice was trembling and I said,"Can't you just treat me as dead? I am no longer here. I miss me in my heart sometimes."……"

Before I finished speaking, Zhao Jihuan suddenly stood up with a whoosh and held my face tightly with both hands. I struggled in terror, trying to escape his grasp. He was so strong that I had to hold his hand with both hands to try to make him relax. I shouted:"You will meet many different women in the future. You will meet the ones you like, the ones you like, and the ones you admire."……"

However, Zhao Jihuan suddenly chuckled, and his laughter was full of ridicule and anger. I saw his face twisted, and the fire in his eyes was burning, as if he was going to burn everything. His breathing was rapid and heavy, and each breath was accompanied by violent rise and fall of his chest. His laughter echoed in the air, hoarse and shrill, creepy.

I quickly stopped struggling, looked at him quietly, and asked softly:"Are you okay? What's wrong?" Zhao Jihuan just stared at me quietly, his face twisted, and the corners of his mouth twitched slightly. He said word by word:"You're dead too?! You're dead too?! You're dead too?!" His voice was filled with madness and ridicule, as if he was laughing at the absurdity of the world and his own helplessness.

I was frightened by his state, and there was an inexplicable fear in my heart. I could only coax him softly:"No, no." I gently hugged him and patted his back, trying to calm him down. I don't know how long it took before his body slowly softened and he hugged me back quietly.

I said with lingering fear:"Do you still have this problem? Is it because of your grandpa?" Zhao Jihuan's body stiffened instantly. I quickly patted his back and comforted him:"It's okay, it's okay." I thought of the situation just now and suggested :"Let's sit and eat first."

I pulled away from him and looked at his face. His eyes have returned to their original gentle look. I asked him to sit down and served him food. I tried to continue our conversation:"Come and eat food." Zhao Jihuan just lowered his head in silence and ate without responding.

I looked at him and understood that his psychological barrier would not be easily eliminated. I looked at his side face while eating, and felt mixed emotions in my heart. I must ask clearly about this.

Soft light shines on our dining table, and the food on the table is steaming and fragrant. Create a quiet and peaceful atmosphere. We ate in silence.

However, this moment of tranquility was quickly broken. Zhao Jihuan suddenly took a deep breath, as if to calm down the excitement in his heart. He turned his head, with a trace of shame in his eyes, and said to me in a slightly trembling voice:"I'm sorry, did I scare you just now?"

I looked at him with a trace of sympathy in my heart. There was an indescribable pain hidden in his eyes, as if he was trying his best to hide something. I smiled softly and tried to lighten the atmosphere:"A little bit, do you want to say this now? If you don't want to say it, just say it." The corners of Zhao Jihuan's mouth curled up slightly, showing a disdainful smile:"You have a high position and heavy responsibilities."There was a hint of desolation and helplessness in his voice.

I felt a chill rising up my spine and shuddered. Zhao Jihuan's expression became complicated, and a trace of sadness and helplessness flashed in his eyes. He lowered his head, folded his hands on the table, and intertwined his fingers tightly.

"do you know? Zhao Jihuan's voice was choked with sobs,"Sometimes, status and power do not bring happiness and satisfaction, but instead bring endless pain and responsibility.""His hands were shaking slightly, as if he was trying to control his emotions.

I listened quietly without interrupting him. I knew that at this moment he needed to vent his inner pain and pressure.

"Whenever I stand at a high place, overlooking all living things, I feel an invisible weight on my shoulders."Zhao Jihuan's tone became serious,"I must make wise decisions to protect the country and the people. However, every choice comes with sacrifice and pain. I lost family, friends, and even myself."

There was a trace of tears in the corner of his eyes, but he was quickly forced back. He raised his head and looked at the moon outside the window, with a trace of confusion and confusion in his eyes. At this moment, he was no longer the majestic one. The prince is a man who is deeply tortured in his heart. His pain and helplessness infected me, making me feel an inexplicable sadness and helplessness.

I gently held his hand and tried to give him some comfort and support..

He lowered his head, clenched the wine glass with both hands, and his voice was trembling:"Twelve years ago, again twelve years ago. I remember that there was snow all over the sky and the fields, and Chu State had no chess to play. My father sent me as an envoy to Chu to persuade him to surrender.……"

His voice became smaller and smaller, as if he was falling into the abyss of memories. I listened quietly. His eyes were empty and confused, as if he had lost everything on that cold snowy day.

"My grandfather entertained me very warmly. We drank and ate meat that day. Finally, my grandfather handed me an edict. I opened it and saw that it was a surrender document written and sealed."Zhao Jihuan closed his eyes, as if trying to recall the scene at that time,"I was very strange at that time and was about to ask. Grandpa stood up and patted me on the shoulder and said: 'I know you have questions, Huan'er, we are in a high position. ah! Grandpa is the lord of a country and will never surrender. But Grandpa is the lord of a country, and he wants to protect the people of the country.’"

He took a deep breath and seemed to be trying his best to calm down his emotions."My grandfather smiled bitterly and said: 'Since you have come to negotiate peace, I must have conditions. After surrendering, the people of Chu State will enjoy the same rights as the people of Chen State and can travel freely. You can marry freely, and you will not suffer from the pain of war in the future. The royal family of the Chu Kingdom will retain their fiefdoms and titles to maintain wealth and peace forever.’"

He paused for a moment, a trace of sadness flashed in his eyes,"I was just very happy to agree!!! But my grandfather said: 'Huan'er, the king must not act arbitrarily, he must follow the law of heaven.' My grandfather didn't wait for me to say anything, He smiled and said,"Huan'er, please go! I believe you will be a wise king in the future." Then he pushed me out."

His voice was a little trembling,"When I met my uncle at the door, he just nodded. I took it Looking back after the edict, I saw my grandpa standing at the door with a hunched body, holding a wine glass, smiling and waving to me. At that time, I thought that my grandpa just drank too much, and he was anxious to go back to recover. So he strode away. Who knows what happened next? The sun hadn't risen the next day when I heard the urgent news. My grandfather took poison and died for his country!!!!"

Zhao Jihuan buried his head in his hands, and his shoulders trembled slightly. Everything around him seemed to have stopped, except for his heavy breathing and choked cries.

When I looked at him, I felt like I was back in that snowy day. Everything in front of me became blurry, leaving only a vast expanse of white. Snowflakes are falling on the groundFalling on my eyelashes, they turned into drops of cold tears.

Zhao Jihuan tried to calm down and said slowly:"I tried to recall everything that day, but found that my memory has become blurry. I only remember my grandfather's kind face and the edict in his hand. That edict. It seemed to weigh a thousand pounds and made me breathless.

When I woke up, it was already a few days later. I lay in bed, dizzy, as if I was still dreaming. Every morning, I would walk outside , trying to find traces of dragonflies. However, the dragonflies in winter have long since disappeared, leaving only a bleak scene.

When I was a child, my grandfather used to scare me when I was catching dragonflies, deliberately scaring them away. I pouted my mouth angrily. , but he smiled and said:"Huan'er, don't be angry, I will definitely catch you the most beautiful dragonfly next year."However, now that he is gone, I am left alone to pursue that beautiful memory.

Every night, I dream of that scene: Grandpa was drinking, the glass broke, and his face was bleeding. Or it was my brother The bleeding calf, my brother’s final instructions, and Wang Yingjiao’s smiling face, these nightmares followed me like a shadow and kept me awake all night. I lay on the bed, tossing and turning, with my mother’s crying and my father’s sigh echoing in my ears.

The pressure was like a mountain. In my heart, I can't breathe. I once thought about giving up life and finishing it. However, Yuan'er's appearance made me find hope again. He looked at me with a firm light in his eyes:"Brother, Do you want to die? Yuan'er will accompany you."

At that moment, I seemed to see my own weakness and powerlessness. I slapped myself hard and shouted:"Everyone has to live! We all have to live! The Chen Kingdom still needs us!"My voice echoed in the empty room, like the howl of a lonely wolf."