Broken wings

Although Xiao Xiu is young, she still understands a little, her scalp is numb, and her body begins to move, she doesn't feel pain, but she doesn't have the courage to lift the sheet at this time, she is obviously awake, obviously consciousness still exists, but her fingers don't even dare to move, she doesn't dare to let him know that she is awake, don't dare.

After a while, Xiao Xiu heard his brother's shouts in his room: "Didn't you say that you wanted me to read this book? I found it for you, do you still want to read it?"

Xiao Xiu heard the voice on his body: "Look." Cousin's voice.

Then he moved again, and after a while, his brother's voice came again: "If you don't read it, let's go out and play, these books have been found, and it will be good to take them back when you go home." "

The movement under him stopped, the bottoms were lifted, the pants were lifted, the sheets were covered, and the door was closed. My cousin's voice came from outside the door: "Ah, okay, then let's go out." "

Hearing the sound of the two of them going away, Xiao Xiu's tears dared to fall, and after a long, long time, she didn't lift the sheet in front of her. She has grown up in a nest since she was a child, she has been taught by the atmosphere at home and in the school since she was a child that she can't speak, she is at a young age, if she encounters such a thing, if she has a little courage, can she stop him when he lifts the sheet? can she stop him when he takes off his pants? Is it okay to have a little courage? Can she shout 'Brother help!' to his brother who is only two walls away

As long as she shouted, her brother would come to save her,

she knew that her brother would come, and her brother would save herself even if he tried his best. Just like I told my mother before, even if my mother is cowardly, she will take herself to seek justice.

But her eyes would only widen, she would only be

shocked to the point that her whole body would stiffen, she would only choke on her throat and bear it all, even after he had long since left.

If she had been subjected

to someone else, given him a scolding and let outsiders know about his deeds, would she not have suffered this kind of thing? Even before, why would she only shed tears when she was molested by others, and she would have to be afraid of the intimidation of others? But she did not have the courage or the courage to rush in front of her to help her fight off the bad guys. The cousin came again and again, and each time he avoided his brother's attempts to violate her body, but she didn't dare to say it to anyone. At that time, she was still young, and she didn't have so much deep self-awareness, she just blindly avoided his harassment, because she was a neighbor, and the face of her father and the whole family was gone, she didn't dare to say it to anyone, she didn't dare to say it to her brother, according to her brother's temperament, she knew that she would fight with him when she encountered such a thing, she didn't have the guts, she thought about killing him and going to prison by herself, but she still wanted to live, she didn't want to spend the rest of her life in prison, she thought about whether she could forget it when she grew up in the future, she wanted these memories to stay at that time forever, and never appear in her mind again。

My brother went to work in other places, and my

cousin also left, this matter, Xiao Xiu was buried in the darkest corner of her heart alone, and she cried when she thought about it, no one had ever spied into this corner, and no one had ever soothed her young heart, she was just next to each other, thinking that it would be good to grow up.

Grandma's daughter needed help from her grandmother in the family, so she sent Xiao Xiu to her uncle's house and asked Xiao Xiu to eat with her aunt, which was the family that violated Xiao Xiu. Xiao Xiu thought about cooking and eating by himself, but he couldn't make a fire, and he didn't have money, so he couldn't buy vegetables to cook, so he could only follow his aunt.

The aunt had her own things to do, and she had to take care of the little Hugh

Hajj, which was a drag oil bottle, and often showed impatience, but the little Hugh knew that she was causing them trouble, and if she was older, if her grandmother left a little money for herself, she could take care of herself, but Xiao Xiu had nothing but the schoolbag she was holding tightly.

After a period of time with my aunt, Aunt Guan asked for a penny twice, because she wanted to buy pen and ink, and when her grandmother came back, her aunt told her that Aunt Guan asked for money many times, and her grandmother laughed with her, saying that her father and mother had come back to her.

Later, Xiao Xiu went to the

place where his brother went to work for the summer vacation, and went to the temple fair with his brother, and his brother had a favorite girl at that time, and several brothers pouted and said that they would not go to her house, but her home was in the countryside and uninhabited.

Xiao Xiu sketched a picture in his head, uninhabited, in the countryside, in earthen houses, are they going to bring themselves over and sell them?

On the way to the carriage, Xiao Xiu suddenly cried and said that he would not go, and his brother saw that she was crying so sadly, so he could only give up.

Later, my sister came back from work, she cherished the days when she was with her sister, and stayed with her sister every day. Later, during a night chat, she told her sister about it, crying while talking, and her sister said angrily that she should not bother with him anymore.

But my sister

still got close to the children of relatives, one day, my cousin was at home by myself, and my sister was going to his house to get something, and Xiao Xiu was reluctant to enter his house, so she waited outside, and halfway my sister showed a head from the gate and beckoned to Xiao Xiu: "Xiu Ji, you come here." "

Xiao Xiu immediately became vigilant, and there was only one person in the house, and she asked, "What are you doing?"

My sister didn't say why, she just asked her to come over, and Xiao Xiu was so angry that tears came out in the end: "What do you want me to do in the past!".

"Here you go. "

Xiao Xiu walked over slowly, it turned out that her sister just wanted her to help tie her belt. And she thought that her sister had discussed with him and wanted to harm herself.

When she followed her father out to sell

something, she sold out of things, and her father wanted to go to see the cockfight, leaving Xiao Xiu Ji alone in the carriage, and on the way there, Xiao Xiu couldn't help but think, is his father going to sell himself?

Was it? Did they, the people closest to them, want to hurt themselves? Obviously not, but who could she trust at that time?

Later, Qi Weizong found that Xiao Xiu had not grown at all in the

three or four years that he had followed his grandmother, and he was worried that she would not be hungry, so he went home to work, and by the way, he brought Xiao Xiu to cook, and Xiao Xiu grew taller in a year.

But there are also people who have been beaten a few times because of the money, each time with a steamed bun face, and then sitting alone on their bed in a daze, sometimes they start to giggle after being in a daze for a long time.

After the harvest of the family's land, Qi Weizong went to harvest grain with Xiao Xiu, and Xiao Xiu's tired little face was scorched and yellow, because he had to bend over all the time, and his arms were burned on his legs, and he was purple and black. However, Xiao Xiu saw that Qi Weizong was also very tired, so when Qi Weizong had eaten and rested at noon, he continued to collect grain with a sickle. Qi Weizong woke up and found that Xiao Xiu was not at home, and thought she had gone out to play, so he immediately shouted: "Xiu Hajj ——!".

Xiao Xiu was

working hard, and when he heard him call himself, he hurriedly raised his head and answered, and he could hear him shouting: "Where did you go——!" Xiao Xiu Ji's face was pulled down, and he went back with a sickle expressionlessly, Qi Weizong saw that she was going to harvest grain, and said to himself, "I thought you went." "

After collecting the grain in a piece of land, Xiao Xiu was tired and didn't want to move, so he went back and washed the clothes of the two people, and then went back to the house, Qi Weizong said to her outside the window: "You remember to cook some food yourself, and I will go and bring back all the food." "

Xiao Xiu was a little sick to his stomach when he was tired, and where could he still eat, so he wanted to tell him that he didn't eat, just make it for him: "I can't eat ......".

Qi Weizong thought that Xiao Xiu was passively resisting, and he didn't want to work, so he immediately shouted: "If you don't want to eat, don't eat! Do you think you can stop working without eating? I can't do anything at all! I have never seen a child like you! Who is it!".

Xiao Xiu's throat seemed to be blocked, and he pulled the corners of his mouth and said, "I'm just thirsty ......."

"If you are thirsty, drink tea! If you don't want to eat, you don't have to do it, do you like to eat or not!" Then I heard him slam against the door, and Xiao Xiu laughed stupidly at the air, but tears welled up in his eyes.

When all the grain was harvested, Qi Weizong

saw that there were people who went to the countryside to sell fruits, so he asked Xiao Xiu if he wanted to eat it, Xiao Xiu nodded, Qi Weizong weighed her a few catties of fruit, let her sit on the side and rest, Xiao Xiu took a bite of melon, only felt that it was really sweet.

After a long time, if you give a little sweetness, the whole world will be sweet.

Although she was poor and bitter when she was a child, and she grew up like this, there are still many moments in her memory when Qiweizong doted on her.

In fact, Xiao Xiu didn't tell anyone, she committed suicide many times in the years she followed her grandmother, she didn't know what it was like to die at that time, but she felt that the days were dark, and she really couldn't live anymore. She remembered that she was beaten by her grandmother once, and she knew that she was wronged, but her grandmother didn't believe it and beat her. At that time, as long as she was wronged, the dark corner of her heart opened the door, and all the things that had hurt her lingered in her ears, why didn't she die? If you die, you don't have to bear all this, and nothing will happen when you die.

She found out the expired ones in the house, all kinds of medicines, and ate them all, and then put on neat clothes, slept in her brother's room, and waited for death to come.

But she woke up again, and her grandmother yelled at her angrily, "You can't call you when you're ready!" and left.

Xiao Xiu was dazed, but she did wake up, and she was going to die but she had to get up to eat?

Later, when she was older, in fact, she knew that her experience was nothing, in her grandmother's generation,

her father's generation, suffered much more than herself, and people didn't look for death all day long, after all, when she was older, it was not like when she was a child, and there was only that small family and school in her own world.

Later, her cousin got married, the whole family was beaming, ready to welcome his bride, Qi Weizong also went to his house to help, Xiao Xiu was alone at home, Qi Weizong called someone to call Xiao Xiu several times, she was unwilling to go. Later, my uncle came over, wrinkled his eyebrows, and said, "Why is it so difficult to invite? "

Xiao Xiu felt that every time she

stepped into his door, it was disgusting and made her want to vomit, every time she saw her family talking and laughing with him, she wanted to tear him apart, and when she saw her family blessing him, she was so disgusted that she didn't even want to deal with her own family, of course, no one noticed her emotions, she was so inconspicuous after all. Then she absurdly drank his wedding wine, ate his banquet, watched him marry his wife, and tied the knot, even though she didn't eat a few chopsticks dishes, she wanted to pick her throat and vomit it all.

The more atmospheric and graceful a person is on the surface, the more human-faced and beast-hearted he is when he opens his heart, everyone praises him for being a good young man, and he is full of praise for him, and he is not even shit in Xiao Xiu's heart.

The

two people who had hurt her had wives, had children, and lived happily ever after, and no one remembered the evil deeds they committed back then. However, she is still paying the price for the experiences she experienced in her childhood, she doesn't dare to pass by men, she doesn't dare to touch men normally, she is extremely wary of outsiders, she doesn't even dare to get along with boys, she is afraid when she sees men, she is afraid from her heart, and she feels creepy when she sees groups of men.

It wasn't until she went out of her hometown in recent years, saw the outside world, and came into contact with more people, that her heart was a little better, and she didn't think about the things in the past, but she had come out. But because of the age of getting married, and arranged to meet the boys in the neighborhood, Qi Xiu was not ready to get married, and she didn't want to get married, she almost stubbornly thought, if there is no person who hurts me to the bone, I will live a single life, and I don't want to find a man to abuse myself.

But it has been nearly 20 years, and when she grew up, Qi Xiujin still remembers these things and the psychological damage caused to her by these two people, although she is the only one who remembers, although no one helps her to channel her psychology, although no one helps her teach the person who bullied her, although Liu Xici also thinks that she will forget it when she grows up.

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